Post: #1

Gaming women is like the game of football. Your starting point (combination of looks, status, and game) is like the field position you start off the drive in. The better starting point you have, the shorter distance you have to go in order to score a touchdown (i.e. the less you have to work for sex). Although you don’t have full control over your starting field position, you do have a certain degree of say in it, determined by the play of your team on special teams (getting a good return on a kick or a punt…i.e. dressing well, improving your overall self, etc.).

Once your team is on offense, you can either choose to drive methodically down the field and pick up first downs along the way (i.e. build attraction, escalate, makeout, bang), or you can try to go for the quick strike and hit them with the long bomb (i.e. super direct game), although that is a high-risk-high-reward type of play. It could either get you some quick points (i.e. quickly leads to a bang) or if you fail to convert the pass, it could kill your drive by putting you in a third-and-long situation. Or worse, it could even result in a turnover.

Say you choose to drive down the field with short and intermediate passes, with some running plays mixed in, you are going with lower risk individual plays, but due to the sheer volume of plays you have to run, there are more chances that something could go wrong at some point (i.e. you get cockblocked, you say the wrong thing, other variables, etc.), stalling your drive.

Another thing that separates the elite teams (the true players) from the rest of the league is the ability to finish drives off once they reach the red zone (i.e. once you have the girl in the bedroom). Even with a compressed field and the defense hanging tough with its back against the wall, the great teams are able to find a way to punch the ball into the endzone for a touchdown (i.e. overcome last minute resistance to achieve the bang), whereas the mediocre teams end up settling for a field goal.

That also brings me to mention that there are several types of defenses. Some defenses are very aggressive and live by the motto of “Not another yard.” These are the girls with high bitch shields and may shut you down at any given moment. However, with the right personnel and execution, you may be able to exploit this defense’s weaknesses and put up some quick points on the board. The other type of defense is the “bend-but-don’t-break” defense. This girl will let you do your thing and pick up a lot of yards and first downs along the way (makeout, blowjob, etc.). She may seem very easy to score on, but once you get into the redzone (i.e. close to the bang), the defense holds and you’re left settling for a field goal after having a first-and-goal from the 5 yard line only moments earlier (think: this past year’s Baltimore Ravens that won the Super Bowl).

The venue or location you choose is like the stadium and environment you play in. Depending on your team’s style of play (power running team, spread aerial attack, etc….i.e. your style of game), you may do well in certain types of situations (snowy weather vs. dome) but not so much in others. Or you may find that your team matches up better against some teams but not so much against others (so find your niche type of girl). You just have to find your fishbowl (i.e. your homefield advantage).

With all that said, this game is not for the weak. But if played the right way (pride, persistence, toughness, and hardwork), it is a damn beautiful game.


Have a great weekend everybody. And for those of you in NY, stay safe from the blizzard.


"Practice doesn't make perfect. Only perfect practice makes perfect."
~Vince Lombardi

Post: #2

If pussy was football, you could call me Lawrence Taylor.

not really. My game is on par with my team right now (Miami Dolphins), but I just thought that was funny.


Gaming has been more like betting on football to me lately. No matter how much of a role you get yourself on, the end result is always in the red.

Post: #3

Dave Chappelle did skits on this

http://www.comedycentral.com/video-clips...tory--pt-2

http://www.comedycentral.com/video-clips...up-history

Post: #4

someone has post-football season depression. LOL!

hilarious analogy though.

Post: #5

I was skeptical when I read the title, but the metaphor is actually very good. Well done.

After my next bang I will dump a cooler of Gatorade all over the girl to celebrate.

Post: #6

Gaming Women is like Football. Unless, of course, you are Manti Te'o

Post: #7

Not a bad analogy:

   

Post: #8

At the end of the night it's time to break out the Hail Mary and just throw it out there.

Low chance of success but occasionally you score.

Post: #9

When you square up and try to take women head on, you will get concussed like a 50 year old ex NFL player. If you play the womens game, you will end up a loser long term with permanent damage done to you

Post: #10

Anyone watch the Lingerie Bowl?

Post: #11

I liked your football analogy. I love reducing everything to a sports analogy, especially the NFL. I like to compare my friend's style of play to certain pro quarterbacks'.

For example, high risk/high reward player would be a Brett Favre. It's either touchdown or back-breaking interception. A guy with a good niche/social circle but doesn't do well outside of his system would be a Kurt Warner. He's the greatest show on turf when he's playing his game, not much to talk about without it. A guy who has all the phsyical talents (i.e. tall, handsome), but just never developed like everyone thought and let himself go would be a Jamarcus Russell. A bust. And a guy who always fucks up (especially in critical situations) would be a Mark Sanchez. A guy who takes no risks would be an Alex Smith, the game manager who is always in danger of getting benched.

Post: #12

(02-09-2013 07:50 PM)Bacchus Wrote:  I liked your football analogy. I love reducing everything to a sports analogy, especially the NFL. I like to compare my friend's style of play to certain pro quarterbacks'.

For example, high risk/high reward player would be a Brett Favre. It's either touchdown or back-breaking interception. A guy with a good niche/social circle but doesn't do well outside of his system would be a Kurt Warner. He's the greatest show on turf when he's playing his game, not much to talk about without it. A guy who has all the phsyical talents (i.e. tall, handsome), but just never developed like everyone thought and let himself go would be a Jamarcus Russell. A bust. And a guy who always fucks up (especially in critical situations) would be a Mark Sanchez. A guy who takes no risks would be an Alex Smith, the game manager who is always in danger of getting benched.

Kurt Warner took two separate teams to Super Bowls with separate personnel and coordinators... so you can't argue that he's a "system quarterback". And his down years at the end of his time with the Rams and during his time with the Giants was because he had a broken thumb on his throwing hand. (He probably also was dealing with brain trauma caused by the Mike Martze offensive philosophy that left pass rushers free.) This is quickly becoming the espn forum...

In terms of using football as an analogy for game; I think it would depend on how much you see relations with the opposite sex as a zero sum game - with winners and losers. But it's fun to play with the idea for sure.