Post: #1

When I was 16 I had my first official girlfriend. I was crazy in love with her and I thought the sex was pretty good. After the first time we had sex, I quietly excused myself, and went and jumped up and down in the bathroom in front of the mirror while silently shouting Yes! Then at 18, I had my 2nd girlfriend, and if I thought the sex was good with the first one, this one was even better. She loved having sex outdoors and in public places. Again, I was crazy about her. With the 3rd one to my amazement the sex got even better. While she was the most innocent looking of the three she was also the most passionate. You know what they say about Latin women – it’s true. With all of these women, I found them very attractive, I was in love, and the sex was great! BUT, then I started watching porn and thought to myself that if the sex I had was that great this stuff must be even better! With this thought, I set out to experience all of the different kind of sex there was to be had. The same way Roosh dedicated himself to getting flags I dedicated myself to experiencing different the wide world of sex.

I had just about all the different types of sex the average guy would ever wish for with all of the different types of women he would wish to have it with. I had 3-somes, 4-somes, 5-somes, orgies, sex parties, S&M, strippers, hookers, young, old, all types of hair color, eye color, major races, cultures, and ethnicities: Brasilians, Russians, Thais, etc. I had sex in strip clubs, in department stores, in airplanes, I had sex with girls who were high on coke, pot, etc. I tried all the different positions and holes. There’s even some stuff I am ashamed to admit here. If you have seen it in some porn movie there’s a good chance I have done it. And while I won’t deny that some of it was a great experience and I even went back for seconds and more - there was nothing I really became attached to. Most of it was just a novelty that once done didn’t hold that much interest and many times didn’t even bring that much pleasure. Most of the girls I can’t even remember. After each series I would look back and compare it to what I had experience originally with my first three girlfriends and you know what? Everything always came up short. After spending years and a lot of time and effort to have all this different sex the best sex I ever had was what I had at the very beginning. Just plain old regular sex, no condoms, coming inside the girls pussy (this is important) with a girl I was very attracted to and cared about and she in return. But it took me awhile to figure out why this was.

If you don’t play golf you probably don’t understand why people love it. To enjoy golf you have to love it. There is nothing innately enjoyable about walking around in the sun trying to hit a little ball in a little hole. All of the joy of golf is in our own mind. And it’s the same with sex. The more we are attracted to a girl and the more feelings we have for her the more we will enjoy the sex IF it is acceptable. If she’s really bad then it will eventually have an impact but as long as she’s ok, it will be good. I enjoyed having sex with my girlfriends the most not because the sex was that great but because my feelings for them was! It wasn’t the sex that created the most joy it was my feelings about the girl that did. The sex was just a way of expressing your feelings and THIS is what women are born knowing. It wasn’t about the sex it was about my feelings for the girl. If you don’t like golf I can put you on the best golf course with the best equipment and you still will not enjoy it. How we feel about a person or something determines how much we will enjoy it. That was the first lesson. The second was: I didn’t like a lot of sex that other people seem to like. For example:

I don’t like having sex with strange women. I prefer to have sex with a woman I know and am comfortable with.
I don’t like having group sex. I prefer to have sex with one woman at a time.
I don’t like having to be abusive to women, slapping them etc.
I don’t like having sex with drunk or fucked up women.

But hey, this is just me. You may find you like having these kinds of sex or maybe even S&M sex. I have a good friend that enjoys having sex with lifeless girls. The point is, don’t let someone else definition of what makes them happy be your definition of happiness. Just because someone else enjoys something doesn’t mean you will and there is nothing wrong if you don’t. Don’t feel you have to enjoy someone else definition of what great sex is. I wasted a lot of years chasing someone else definition of what great sex is. For example, I knew from the start I didn’t like sex with multiple women/people yet I kept going, adding even more women and people hoping that would somehow magically make the sex better – it didn’t.

Now when someone tells me oh, they would love to bang three girls at the same time, I just smile inside and don’t say anything. I know it’s a road they will have to walk down for themselves and in doing so they will also hopefully find themselves like I did and come to realize what the best sex is – for them.

Post: #2

Nice little read.

Those first ones are the ones a man never forgets. Even after countless other women where I would consider the sex to be better, the first ones are where the real transformation takes place.

Quote:I don’t like having sex with strange women. I prefer to have sex with a woman I know and am comfortable with.
I don’t like having group sex. I prefer to have sex with one woman at a time.
I don’t like having to be abusive to women, slapping them etc.
I don’t like having sex with drunk or fucked up women.

I am with you on these. Although I did have a threesome that was pretty good. I also had one that was too much work, much like this one:

Post: #3

Thanks and yes I did have some great sexual experiences. Brasilian girls are really good, they deserve their reputation. But a Brasilian girl on cocaine takes it to a different level all together. I also use to think that I need to be like guys like Roosh or Soup that goes out and get a lot of ONS. But the truth is I don't really like ONS. I don't enjoy sex that much with a drunk, strange woman I am only somewhat attracted to at 5am in the morning; when I am tired and all I really want to do is go to sleep. Unless you get lucky, getting sex from a girl takes a lot of work in any kind of situation, at least it does for me. And I have a feeling that's the way it is for most guys. Doesn't make much sense to me to have sex when I can't really enjoy it plus it increases the chance she will have regrets after and you won't see her again. (I lost a beautiful Olympic Silver Medalist and a really great girl because of this and I have regretted it to this day - true story. She felt I manipulated her and she was right. The worse part was, I didn't do it for me, I did it to impress my friends.) If I am going to put in all of that work I want to have sex when I am fully awake and I want to have it more than just one time. As a guy from here I was recently hanging out with said: girls really don't get good until like the fourth time anyway and I agree. (But while I don't like ONS I do enjoy having a one or two good lovers around.)

I understand that the hook up sex culture exist but I still believe women prefer to have sex and give better sex with someone that they have some kind of emotional connection with. My ex-girlfriends weren't naturally better than the Brasilians but because they were crazy about me they were willing to make a big effort to please me and ultimate that's what matters. When you have two people that care enough about each other to want the other person to have some great sex, you actually will and after you can just lay there and feel great about it all over again instead of thinking how you can get the hell out of there.

** Wow, and with this post I've become an Alpha Male

Post: #4

Interesting and thought-provoking posts, Nomad77. I especially agree with your philosophy about wanting a connection before the sex can really be meaningful.

Quote:Doesn't make much sense to me to have sex when I can't really enjoy it plus it increases the chance she will have regrets after and you won't see her again. (I lost a beautiful Olympic Silver Medalist and a really great girl because of this and I have regretted it to this day - true story. She felt I manipulated her and she was right. The worse part was, I didn't do it for me, I did it to impress my friends.)

Sometimes I wonder about this. I have lost girls because I didn't strike when the iron was hot, and I have lost girls because I pounced too early and scared the cat away. I think this is called buyer's remorse?

When would you suggest waiting, and when would you say pounce immediately because next time will be too late? I hope its not too broad a question.

I ask mostly because the last girl told me I was too aggressive and she wasn't comfortable and ended it after 2 dates, and I felt that she was a high value girl that I would've liked to keep around.

Post: #5

I have never lost a girl from waiting. The key to this is letting the girl know that you are sexually attracted to her, that you do want her, BUT that you are also choosing to wait until she is ready to give herself to you. You do this by escalating sexually just not taking it to the point where you are manipulating her and the situation to get sex. Girls knows when this is happening even when they are allowing it to happen. Because of my skill set and personality it's easy for me to simply overpower and manipulate a girl but no one likes to feel manipulated. I also don't like how I feel when I do it. You also have to be aware of a girl's comfort level. Every girl is going to be different. I have a simple rule I follow when it comes to sexually interaction with a girl: I call it the 80/20 rule. I am willing to do 80% of the work but she has to also contribute 20% - preferably more. Anytime I feel that I am getting less than 10% from her, I back off. For that matter, anytime I feel I am getting less than 10% in any way, I back off. "Chasing" a girl too much has never worked for me.

I don't want to "take" sex from a girl, I want her to "give" it to me. And there is a big difference between taken and given sex.

Post: #6

Love your posts Nomad, very insightful.

Still being new to sex at the moment I just want to increase my notch count. But maybe I am taking it for granted, because I'm making it seem like sex is all about numbers.

I haven't had sex yet where there was a true connection. Yea, strong attraction and lust, but little emotional connection.

It's something I want to experience sometime soon.

Post: #7

Thanks. There is nothing wrong with wanting to experience different girls. I did it and it just part of life and how we learn - from our experiences. But yes, sex with a girl you have a good emotional connection with is the best kind of sex there is - at least for me. I live for these kind of girls. When I encounter a girl I feel some chemistry with (that's where it starts) I am willing to put in a lot of work to build and create a sexual relationship with her.

I tell teens all the time, try to have sex the first time with someone you love and feel comfortable with. It's the best way to experience sex for the first time. After, you can experiment with all the other stuff. Looking back I am very grateful to my first three girlfriends for setting a standard that I now know was the best to begin with. When it comes to relationships girls instinctively know what we as men have to learn.

Post: #8

Quote:I have never lost a girl from waiting. The key to this is letting the girl know that you are sexually attracted to her, that you do want her, BUT that you are also choosing to wait until she is ready to give herself to you. You do this by escalating sexually just not taking it to the point where you are manipulating her and the situation to get sex.

Thanks. I think what I was doing wrong was either not escalating sexually at all, or going for broke every time I escalated. I didn't sit back and let the pressure cooker sit until the whistle was ready to blow, so to speak.

I'll keep this in mind from now on.

Post: #9

Well, your analogy is almost correct. You have to be the fire under the pressure cooker Just keep the heat to a nice simmer - not too high, not too low. Girls love sexual tension. The best sex I have had is when I was able to build the sexual tension to the point where the girl actually jumped on me.

Actually quote: "You started this and now you are going to finish it."

My first girlfriend was German by the way.

Post: #10

(06-28-2013 11:56 AM)Nomad77 Wrote:  Actually quote: "You started this and now you are going to finish it."

Great post...

Another one that works well after a girl wakes you from sleep by touching/caressing you... Wake up and say: "Your mouth can finish what your hands have started..."

Post: #11

Yep, I learned that ONS's are highly overrated a long time ago and I have only a fraction of your notches. While you still have to pull them occasionally to keep your mojo up, the best sex is one where there is built up comfort and attraction and the broad fully gives herself to you, both physically and emotionally.

Post: #12

I don't mind a ONS under the right circumstances. I will also go for sex right away, again, under the right circumstances.

1. I find the girl really sexually attractive and believe she will be good in bed.
2. She's into me.
3. She's not completely wasted.
4. I don't feel I have to manipulate the situation to the point where I feel like a used car sales man.
5. It's not 5am in the morning or I am not too tired.

Post: #13

@augen sehen Also keep in mind, girls can change their minds about you in a second and for literally any reason. If there is one thing I have learned in life is that there is no such thing as a sure thing. You can do everything right and still have it not work out. The problem is, you don't know what is going on in a girls life. There is all kinds of variables you simply cannot account for. At the end of the day all you can do is make your best moves based on the information you have and accept that the information you have will always be very incomplete.

I am pretty sure I just lost a woman I had four great dates with. Do I know why? Nope and I never will. Accepting this and just moving on is one of the hardest things you will ever learn to do.

Post: #14

(06-28-2013 12:32 PM)Nomad77 Wrote:  I am pretty sure I just lost a woman I had four great dates with. Do I know why? Nope and I never will. Accepting this and just moving on is one of the hardest things you will ever learn to do.

This is the single most difficult part of game for me. I'm perfectly fine making every kind of mistake, screwup, bad move, you name it as long as I can know specifically what I did wrong so I can correct my behavior in the future. The dating in a vacuum part is what drives me to drink...

Post: #15

Most of the time you have done nothing wrong. For example, her ex-boyfriend or husband could have come back into the picture. She could suddenly feel she's not hot enough to keep you around. Most of the time, it has nothing to do with you, it's a problem with themselves. Now, if you find that this is happening frequently ok, it could be something about you. But in general, I expect a failure rate of anywhere from 20 - 40% here in the US. This is why it's important to be working on more than one woman at the same time.

Even when you are in an official relationship the woman can just decide to leave. She will just be more diplomatic about it. The way you protect yourself is to follow this simple rule: lead physically but follow emotionally. You always want to feel you are following a woman emotionally. The moment you get ahead of her emotionally you are setting yourself up for a fall.

Post: #16

The greatest sex is when emotions are involved for sure. I'd love to have a girl that blows my mind- just haven't met her yet. It doesn't matter if you are fucking one or hundred girls. All that matters is that you have options and aren't with staying with a girl because you afraid that you won't get another.

I had that feeling with a threesome.

I've had kisses that were much more powerful feeling than 30 bangs.

I think this stuff is important because building a great experience is the core of game. The more powerful the experience, the less she will be in her head, and the more likely she will be to give your head.

The more I get into game the more I see I'm trying to transition to utter-dominance vs. pushing a boulder up a hill. Ideally, I want to create such a vibe that the pussy presents itself to me. This as opposed to constipated, struggling game which is my usual.

It's a magic trick- you take her attention away from the fact that you are having sex.

Post: #17

(06-28-2013 12:42 AM)Nomad77 Wrote:  coming inside the girls pussy (this is important)

+1

"Lifes about, shooting your load"

Post: #18

When I was 17 I raw dogged for the first time with this 21 year old chick that I was crazy about. The combination of me having sex, doing it raw, the chick being 21& hot, and me having feelings for her made it incredible. That was definitely top 5, if not the best.

Post: #19

(06-28-2013 12:42 AM)Nomad77 Wrote:  And it’s the same with sex. The more we are attracted to a girl and the more feelings we have for her the more we will enjoy the sex IF it is acceptable. If she’s really bad then it will eventually have an impact but as long as she’s ok, it will be good. I enjoyed having sex with my girlfriends the most not because the sex was that great but because my feelings for them was! It wasn’t the sex that created the most joy it was my feelings about the girl that did. The sex was just a way of expressing your feelings and THIS is what women are born knowing. It wasn’t about the sex it was about my feelings for the girl...

I don’t like having sex with strange women. I prefer to have sex with a woman I know and am comfortable with.
I don’t like having group sex. I prefer to have sex with one woman at a time.
I don’t like having to be abusive to women, slapping them etc.
I don’t like having sex with drunk or fucked up women.


...

Now when someone tells me oh, they would love to bang three girls at the same time, I just smile inside and don’t say anything. I know it’s a road they will have to walk down for themselves and in doing so they will also hopefully find themselves like I did and come to realize what the best sex is – for them.

To point out a thing quote by Zen/ Spiritual gurus - The JOY is within you, the HAPPINESS is within you. You may think it is in the THING outside but it all happens within you.

How we feel about the person and how they feel about us makes a huge difference.

Whether its LTR Love or MLTR open love or FWB with a lovely connect.

Maybe its a bit sappy but I have to agree.. I could not really enjoy great equation on the first time with someone.

Sex is Like a Dance, there is a certain chemistry & rhythm (physical, mental, emotional, spiritual) that has to be built with the PARTNER.
Sometimes it happens right away, just like that. Sometimes it takes a little while to establish synchronized rhythm. And with some people you may not be able to "Gel" at all.

I think the 3 some thing is more of an ego kick that you were able to GET it than anything. Being able get one hot woman to make it with you will be a huge ego boost and get lots of props & respect from other men. 3 some is the amplified ego boost.

The question is.. Doing it for an ego kick or doing it because you enjoying DANCING with someone for the pleasurable DANCE.

Its like pretending to like SUSHI because its fancy, but you really want a tasty Malaysian stir fry with gravy to satisfy your palette. Even then nothing wrong with SUSHI, maybe some days you want a subtler flavor.

This is the reason I created this thread -
/thread-21487.html
Fewer Clean Quality Polyamory/ MLTR girls vs Possibly Infected Drunk Girls. Thoughts?

I think it was more to do with what I enjoyed v/s did not enjoy.

Post: #20

+1

DEVI - I have to say it was pretty on.
Dominance - Makes you feel like a man - Ying & Yang
Emotion -
Variation - If you get bored of the same stuff
IMMERSION - ..

(06-28-2013 10:22 AM)Nomad77 Wrote:  Thanks and yes I did have some great sexual experiences. Brasilian girls are really good, they deserve their reputation. But a Brasilian girl on cocaine takes it to a different level all together. I also use to think that I need to be like guys like Roosh or Soup that goes out and get a lot of ONS. But the truth is I don't really like ONS. I don't enjoy sex that much with a drunk, strange woman I am only somewhat attracted to at 5am in the morning; when I am tired and all I really want to do is go to sleep. Unless you get lucky, getting sex from a girl takes a lot of work in any kind of situation, at least it does for me. And I have a feeling that's the way it is for most guys. Doesn't make much sense to me to have sex when I can't really enjoy it plus it increases the chance she will have regrets after and you won't see her again. (I lost a beautiful Olympic Silver Medalist and a really great girl because of this and I have regretted it to this day - true story. She felt I manipulated her and she was right. The worse part was, I didn't do it for me, I did it to impress my friends.) If I am going to put in all of that work I want to have sex when I am fully awake and I want to have it more than just one time. As a guy from here I was recently hanging out with said: girls really don't get good until like the fourth time anyway and I agree. (But while I don't like ONS I do enjoy having a one or two good lovers around.)

I understand that the hook up sex culture exist but I still believe women prefer to have sex and give better sex with someone that they have some kind of emotional connection with. My ex-girlfriends weren't naturally better than the Brasilians but because they were crazy about me they were willing to make a big effort to please me and ultimate that's what matters. When you have two people that care enough about each other to want the other person to have some great sex, you actually will and after you can just lay there and feel great about it all over again instead of thinking how you can get the hell out of there.

** Wow, and with this post I've become an Alpha Male

(06-28-2013 11:22 AM)Nomad77 Wrote:  Thanks. There is nothing wrong with wanting to experience different girls. I did it and it just part of life and how we learn - from our experiences. But yes, sex with a girl you have a good emotional connection with is the best kind of sex there is - at least for me. I live for these kind of girls. When I encounter a girl I feel some chemistry with (that's where it starts) I am willing to put in a lot of work to build and create a sexual relationship with her.

I tell teens all the time, try to have sex the first time with someone you love and feel comfortable with. It's the best way to experience sex for the first time. After, you can experiment with all the other stuff. Looking back I am very grateful to my first three girlfriends for setting a standard that I now know was the best to begin with. When it comes to relationships girls instinctively know what we as men have to learn.

(06-28-2013 12:25 PM)Nomad77 Wrote:  I don't mind a ONS under the right circumstances. I will also go for sex right away, again, under the right circumstances.

1. I find the girl really sexually attractive and believe she will be good in bed.
2. She's into me.
3. She's not completely wasted.
4. I don't feel I have to manipulate the situation to the point where I feel like a used car sales man.
5. It's not 5am in the morning or I am not too tired.

(06-28-2013 06:02 PM)Nomad77 Wrote:  Most of the time you have done nothing wrong. For example, her ex-boyfriend or husband could have come back into the picture. She could suddenly feel she's not hot enough to keep you around. Most of the time, it has nothing to do with you, it's a problem with themselves. Now, if you find that this is happening frequently ok, it could be something about you. But in general, I expect a failure rate of anywhere from 20 - 40% here in the US. This is why it's important to be working on more than one woman at the same time.

Even when you are in an official relationship the woman can just decide to leave. She will just be more diplomatic about it. The way you protect yourself is to follow this simple rule: lead physically but follow emotionally. You always want to feel you are following a woman emotionally. The moment you get ahead of her emotionally you are setting yourself up for a fall.

(06-28-2013 06:13 PM)soup Wrote:  The greatest sex is when emotions are involved for sure. I'd love to have a girl that blows my mind- just haven't met her yet. It doesn't matter if you are fucking one or hundred girls. All that matters is that you have options and aren't with staying with a girl because you afraid that you won't get another.

I had that feeling with a threesome.

I've had kisses that were much more powerful feeling than 30 bangs.

I think this stuff is important because building a great experience is the core of game. The more powerful the experience, the less she will be in her head, and the more likely she will be to give your head.

The more I get into game the more I see I'm trying to transition to utter-dominance vs. pushing a boulder up a hill. Ideally, I want to create such a vibe that the pussy presents itself to me. This as opposed to constipated, struggling game which is my usual.

It's a magic trick- you take her attention away from the fact that you are having sex.

Post: #21

Great insights. It sounds like you have developed a healthy and mature attitude toward sex.

Unfortunately I've yet to be involved with a girl that I have wild passionate feelings for. I hope that day comes to pass.

Post: #22

I feel the same way. Sex is that much better when it's with someone you really feel. They don't even have to be the best at sex, but at the same time they can give you the best sex if that makes sense. I know my girl probably isn't the best lay I've ever had, (though realistically she's up there) but I enjoy sex with her much more than any other girl I've banged. She just really knows how to please me.

Post: #23

(06-29-2013 04:23 AM)speakeasy Wrote:  Great insights. It sounds like you have developed a healthy and mature attitude toward sex.

Unfortunately I've yet to be involved with a girl that I have wild passionate feelings for. I hope that day comes to pass.

It'll more than likely end in disaster if it does. Feeling like that about any one girl entails losing control of your self, your emotions and your behaviour. Whilst there are some sweet, genuine girls who will reciprocate, many girls in the Western world will dump you out on your ass so fast your head will spin at the first sniff of beta.

Better to keep a balance. Derive 80% of your happiness and wellbeing from inner development and self worth through discipline and achievements, and let girls just be the icing on the cake. Love them, appreciate them, enjoy them, but don't derive your sense of self or happiness from interactions with them.

Post: #24

Love is a powerful biological force.

Think about it- love is what makes people take care of babies.

So, like alcohol, love has a very strong/dominant effect.

If you are a woman, you are controlled by this. If you are man's man (player), you realize the reality of this biomechanical situation and see love for what it is, and can take advantage of it.

Love works for the same reasons that sugar tastes sweet. But, we know that sugar isn't so healthy.

Same thing with oneitis.

It would be cool if psychiatrists acknowledged oneitis.

"Depressed? Sounds like a mild case of oneitis. Prescription: go bang 10 other girls"

That's the therapist that'd I'd trust for me.

A female therapist... either you are banging her, or she's too old to pass the boner test. If the latter is true, she's almost certainly not worthy of your trust.

Are there any NYC players getting with Med school chicks who have you as their patient?

Post: #25

(06-28-2013 11:03 AM)Nomad77 Wrote:  I don't want to "take" sex from a girl, I want her to "give" it to me. And there is a big difference between taken and given sex.

Agree, at least in the romantic version...focus first of romance, kissing, atmosphere, the sex will come... and will be better if you do your homework first. But what's a horny guy supposed to do? NOT fuck a drunk slut standing up from behind in the toilets of a bar or in his building's stairways? ...that is one of the reasons why I love FSU, girls are wild, drink like Cossacks, and prefer rough and dirty sex -preferably in the most unusual places. It's great to have GFs with who you emotionally, intellectually, ect, really mesh well, but it's equally great to have a quick drunk bonk with a (hot) horny girl who was a total stranger one hour before. Both are not indissociable.

Personally I appreciate as much GF sex as drunk fucks with horny sluts. But thinking about it, I suppose that I prefer drunk fucks lol.