DetlefMourning
Chubby Chaser
 
Posts: 290
Joined: Feb 2013
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Male writer actually takes responsibility for his appearance and vows to change
http://www.dallasnews.com/opinion/column...xcuses.ece
Holy shit!
Quote:I tried to feel exempt from caring about my body. I was part of a generation that grew up slouching down. We swaddled our girth with flannel shirts the size of car covers and threaded our legs into jeans that looked like we had barely survived a tiger attack. We celebrated our don’t-care attitude about appearance as if it were a political statement rather than a rationalization. It was easy to do in an era when you could skip showers and call it grunge.
Now that the world no longer gives guys free passes for sloth, men are going to have body-image issues, and I hope they don’t make the mistake of adopting the fool’s gold remedy of acceptance. The silliest, most inadequate and well-intentioned line of self-regard is, “You should love and be happy with yourself just the way you are.”
Loving yourself is not the complete acceptance of the way you are. It’s about trying to improve. I was not nurturing myself when I parked my mouth under an endless conveyor belt of cake. I was nurturing myself when I removed it.
So, instead of claiming that your civil rights are being violated every time it's pointed out that being really fat is bad for your health, you actually concede that there are valid health reasons to lose weight, regardless of what it may or may not do for your looks? And what about the revolutionary and radical idea that practicing self-care and self-love is actually about taking good physical care of yourself, instead of whining and complaining that the world doesn't like fat people and won't conform to your preferences? So having healthy self-esteem and not beating yourself up excessively for your faults, failures and shortcomings is not the same thing as accepting the unacceptable?
If a fat SWPL chick wrote this piece, it would be about how awesome and beautiful she is at any size, and how it's not her fault anyway that she's fat, and she gets plenty of attention anyways from (low SMV thirsty beta) males, so there's no need to change, beauty is a subjective thing for every person, and fuck you if you don't agree.
One of my favorite pieces of advice is "You're just fine the way you are, but there's always room for improvement." We decide for ourselves where we are, where we want to go, and how much hard work it's going to take to get to that place and if we're willing to make the effort to reach our goals. "Just be yourself" is the worst piece of advice ever given to boys growing up. Clearly, if "just being yourself" is not working, then either other people need to change, or you need to change. And I know which strategy is likely to yield more fruit.
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| 03-14-2014 11:28 AM |
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The following 9 users Like DetlefMourning's post:9 users Like DetlefMourning's post
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DetlefMourning
Chubby Chaser
 
Posts: 290
Joined: Feb 2013
Reputation: 5
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RE: Male writer actually takes responsibility for his appearance and vows to change
(03-14-2014 12:36 PM)Kieran Wrote: Another good example of the difference between how most men and women think. To men, self acceptance is more accepting your current circumstances and working with what you have to the best of your abilities. For women it's deluding themselves that they are okay as they are, and that they don't need to change.
Feminism has mutated from something that was once a noble exercise in getting women the right to vote and having autonomy over their own bodies...into basically policing thought crimes and trying to eradicate anything, anywhere that might puncture a girl's ego. They won their major wars (suffrage, erasing glass ceilings, comprehensive reproductive rights) but there's a racket in perpetuating this movement even though through its own successes it should have died out as a consequence. It's now about protecting a girl's feelings, no matter what, as opposed to anything to do with making women whole and complete members of the body politic, even though feminism still markets itself that way.
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| 03-14-2014 01:53 PM |
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The following 5 users Like DetlefMourning's post:5 users Like DetlefMourning's post
cardguy, Brosemite, Agastya, Suits, Kieran
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