Post: #1

My super beta roommate has a female "best friend" who is an absolute knock out. I'm assuming he wants to fuck her, but when they get together it's like they're having girl talk and he's the gay BFF.

Today she came over and she begins spraying herself with perfume. He smells it and goes "Oh my God, you smell just like my mom" in a way that lead to an anecdote about how great his mom is and how much he misses her (My personal rule: You're allowed to bring up your mother ONCE per interaction with a female, and only if it's brought up or you're asked about her).

But I realized that with a different frame and attitude and made by someone else his comment could've been a good hamster-spinning neg. If left alone, "You smell just like my mom" could make her wonder if it's a compliment or an insult. Is your mom pretty? Ugly? Old? Young? A crazy cat lady? I remember saying something similar to this hipster girl once who was wearing these ugly brown loafers. I took one look at them and went "Awesome shoes, tell me where you got them so I can let my grandmother know." If I was a friend-zoned beta this could be perceived as me being genuinely interested in her shoes and my grandmother's fashion. But with aloofness and a smirk it has a completely different meaning.

So does anyone else have any similar negs they've found to be useful?

Post: #2

I wouldn't compare a girl to my mom. You might have a smirk on your face, but she's definitely thinking "fuck this momma's boy."

Replace mom with grandma like you did and it's much better. Makes her seem outdated and lame instead of making you look like a wimp.

Post: #3

I don't compare someone I just met with someone who brought me to this world and raised me. The exception is if she looks like an identical copy of my mother from younger days, it happened to me once.

The alpha thing he could've done when she started (I assume excessively) spraying herself is to playfully tell her something like "What the hell, Adolf? You trying to make a gas chamber out of my room?" after which you tell her or your beta buddy to open the window.

Post: #4

This is one of my favorite articles on the matter: http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2012/11/2...of-asshole

The alpha is always amused. Anything else, and the neg won't fly.

Post: #5

(04-03-2014 03:09 AM)Handsome Creepy Eel Wrote:  This is one of my favorite articles on the matter: http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2012/11/2...of-asshole

The alpha is always amused. Anything else, and the neg won't fly.

THIS ! So true. I do Alpha by keeping it funny, nonchalant, and non reactive. Easiest way for met at least !

Post: #6

(04-03-2014 03:09 AM)Handsome Creepy Eel Wrote:  This is one of my favorite articles on the matter: http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2012/11/2...of-asshole

The alpha is always amused. Anything else, and the neg won't fly.

Great post! I think Heartiste wrote about how a smirk on your face will do wonders, as well. You can say something asshole-ish and have it come off as completely mean, or if you say the same exact thing a certain way with a knowing smirk on your face it could be perfect hamster food. Confidence and stoicism usually help with concealing your emotions and keeping your cool, especially when you say something bound to get a woman's emotions worked up.

Post: #7

(04-03-2014 03:09 AM)Handsome Creepy Eel Wrote:  This is one of my favorite articles on the matter: http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2012/11/2...of-asshole

The alpha is always amused. Anything else, and the neg won't fly.

Yep, the "bratty kid sister" frame. Amused mastery is the best description (think that's Heartiste's line).

Sounds to me like the friendzoned guy talked too much. Just drop your smart remark, sit back, and watch it take effect.

Post: #8

Couple of thoughts about negs:

1) bad if they come from a place of bitterness

2) why do you feel required to use them? are you coming from a paradigm where you think you have lower value and need to knock the girl down?

3) if you feel like negs are necessary then you are probably talking to the wrong types of women (narcissistic, erroneously entitled, vapid) and are only enabling and encouraging their poor behaviour by providing them with attention (her drug of choice)

4) negs can be ok if used in a playful manner, just don't obsess over them, they should be an afterthought where you didn't even realize that you said that, not something you manufacture beforehand and walk into conversations with

5) let go of the whole alpha vs. beta thing, it can become an unhealthy obsession