Post: #1

I'm not one to pass along articles willy-nilly, but I thought the guys on here would appreciate this one:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/41769652

Highlights:

Quote:Man Who Ejaculated into Co-Worker's Water Bottle Convicted

A Fullerton man who secretly ejaculated twice into an attractive co-worker's water bottle -- that she later drank from -- was convicted Thursday of two counts of misdemeanor battery.

....

The victim, identified as Tiffany G. in court, cried after the verdict was read and a sheriff's deputy brought her tissues. She declined comment.

....

She testified that while working in Newport Beach, she left her water bottle at work on a Friday in January 2010, and when she returned on Monday, she took a swig and noticed a foul taste that seemed like semen, so she threw out the bottle.

After moving to the new office in Orange, she again tasted semen in her water last April 6. She said that after the second incident, she took the bottle to a laboratory to have it tested, because Orange police told her they could not open an investigation on speculation of a crime, and her superiors at work did not know what to do about it.

Post: #2

Thoughts:
The look on the guy's face is priceless.
She is incredibly hot.
What he did was disgusting.

Post: #3

When I lived in Wilmington, Delaware as kid there was a local Dominos pizza where some guys got arrested when it was found out that they had ejaculated on people's pizzas. This girl I knew as a teen said she had this friend who took a shit in some chile that got served at a party. Ugh...I'm sure shit like this goes on all the time anyplace that there are bored teens working in fast food. We've probably all ingested someone's spit, boogers, shit or semen unknowingly at one point in our life.

Post: #4

Quote:The look on the guy's face is priceless.
She is incredibly hot.
What he did was disgusting.

Agreed on all three counts (though I wouldn't call her incredibly hot). You could see the beta-gone-crazy in the dude's face. This is the long-term product of having zero game and being tantalized by a hot chick daily.

Yet another guy that game could have helped.

Having said that, I couldn't help but laugh at the notion that the chick instantly recognized the flavor of semen.

(02-25-2011 05:07 PM)speakeasy Wrote:  When I lived in Wilmington, Delaware as kid there was a local Dominos pizza where some guys got arrested when it was found out that they had ejaculated on people's pizzas. This girl I knew as a teen said she had this friend who took a shit in some chile that got served at a party. Ugh...I'm sure shit like this goes on all the time anyplace that there are bored teens working in fast food. We've probably all ingested someone's spit, boogers, shit or semen unknowingly at one point in our life.

I'm sure that's true. I knew a guy that used to put pubic hairs in people's burritos. The sausages in the kitchen would play rock-paper-scissors to see whose turn it would be to yank "a live one."

This is why you're better off making your own food. I'm not convinced that fancy restaurants (versus fast food) are any better.

Post: #5

Lol at her instantly recognizing the taste

Post: #6

(02-25-2011 05:01 PM)kerouac Wrote:  She is incredibly hot.

I'd say she has a plain face, and definitely not something I'd consider "attractive". Probably he is one of those Asian guys for whose every blonde is attractive. The guy was indeed a moron though.

It is also interesting that it was battery; I wonder if it stays the appeal.

Post: #7

She's looks good to me

Post: #8

(02-25-2011 08:32 PM)oldnemesis Wrote:  

(02-25-2011 05:01 PM)kerouac Wrote:  She is incredibly hot.

I'd say she has a plain face, and definitely not something I'd consider "attractive".

And I'll bet she has sharp knees too, right?

Post: #9

I love the defense

Quote:"My view is no crime was committed," Madrid said outside court. "He committed an outrageous, egregious act, but to have battery you have to have an application of force."
Deputy District Attorney Brock Zimmon declined to comment after the verdict, but during closing arguments he said Lallana left the bottle on the desk of his co-worker "as a trap."

as for the beta-male

Quote:Lallana was initially evasive, but eventually told detectives he put his semen in the water bottle because "her lips had touched" it.
"I saw her water bottle and I did it," Lallana says on a tape of the police interview. "For me, it's a release. I think about my wife."

Post: #10

She looks good, but something about that chin bothers me. He, on thr other hand, looks like the fat kid in fourth grade that stared at you all day.

Post: #11

this entire thread is hilarious, thank you OP

Post: #12

The funny thing about it is. All of us KNOW she's on some Rick James shit (Super Freak).

Post: #13

"Having said that, I couldn't help but laugh at the notion that the chick instantly recognized the flavor of semen."

LOL! This is funny. What is also funny is that she had it done to her TWICE. The first time she let it go and just changed her job location, but after the second time she had enough and called the police.

But, seriously, I always make my girlfriends taste my sperm. I think it is ok if she spits in the bathroom afterward, but it really turns me on to cum in a chick's mouth.

I wonder what percentage of the adult female population knows what semen tastes like? I am sure it is pretty damn high. Although, some chicks are really grossed out about getting cum in their mouths.

Post: #14

She looks like a real cunt. I don't know, maybe it's just the face you get when someone cums in your water bottle twice. But she looks like she has a horrible personality.

Post: #15

How do they know for sure it was his unless they made her do a semen taste test with several suspect loads?

I wonder if she recognized the texture? Never had a girl complain about the flavor.

Post: #16

As someone who worked in fast food as a kid, I can tell you that yes, some fucked-up things happen back there. No one ever nutted in or on food when I worked at Arby's back in the day, but spit? Definitely. One dude dropped some juicy, steaming hot roast beef on the floor, wiped it HARD against the floor, put it on the bun with some cheese sause, and bon a petit! We only did things like that to really rude or dickish customers.

That chick's face personifies SEXY to me. You can dissect regarding symmetry, jaw size, etc., but the sight of that wrapped around my johnson would definitely have her tasting ME in short order! I'd gladly have a bottle of water on hand for her to wash the taste out.

Post: #17

As funny as this is I look at my water bottles before I drink out of them. If anything is in it it gets pitched.

Side note.. I lived with a girl and she wouldn't put out sometimes so I put mine in her conditioner bottle when she did that to me. I was was the judge it would be a big not guilty.

Post: #18

(04-02-2012 05:36 PM)el mechanico Wrote:  As funny as this is I look at my water bottles before I drink out of them. If anything is in it it gets pitched.

Side note.. I lived with a girl and she wouldn't put out sometimes so I put mine in her conditioner bottle when she did that to me. I was was the judge it would be a big not guilty.

That isn't a punishment. Nut is probably a better conditioner anyway!

Post: #19

hahaha the girl is hot as hell indeed. Agree 100% with Timoteo's words.

Although the guy is fucking nutjob , I can't deny that is funny as hell to think that she INSTANTLY recognized the taste!