Post: #1

The First Step To Becoming a ‪#ManOfExcellence‬ : Drop the ego at the door and look yourself in the mirror. Be honest with yourself... are you a man that the type of woman you desire would want to date? If not then what things CAN you change about yourself to make it happen?

Don't waste time focusing on the things you CAN'T change... if you change the things you CAN change like your confidence, body language, how you present yourself & your habits that will be enough to outweigh any complaints that you have about yourself that you CAN'T change. The things you CAN'T change are merely just excuses for you not to take action and to be unhappy.

Post: #2

(09-25-2014 09:45 AM)BrandonMarshall Wrote:  Don't waste time focusing on the things you CAN'T change

When you break it down, I don't think there are all that many things that a person can't change. It comes down to a few important factors (as the OP alluded to):

1. Perception

2. Commitment

3. Time (opportunity cost)

Perception is reality. This works both ways - your own perception of yourself, and the perception that others have of you. The "reality" is somewhere in between. Get some unbiased opinions and see where you come up short and where your strengths lie. One thing you probably won't get feedback on however are self-limiting beliefs and faulty thinking. These are the things that hold you back, the walls that are constructed in your mind that can only be broken down if you adopt the changes necessary.

We're the sum of our experiences, so if you haven't experienced a certain something, it's easy to see why it would seem hard or impossible. Try it in baby steps. Do something that's out of your comfort zone, to kickstart your mind into believing that it can be done. This will follow through to other bigger and better areas that need to be overcome.

Push boundaries at the same time as having a healthy respect for your limits (the real ones). Don't be afraid to ask for help from friends, or anyone you believe has a greater knowledge of something than you do. Maybe you have some expertise that could be of benefit to them(?) Establish alliances and don't baulk at the transactional nature of relationships; just do it with integrity.

A firm commitment to improvement needs to be made, otherwise you're just paying lip service and treading water. Some visualisation strategies are a good motivator here - imagine yourself at the peak of your powers, and all the good that can come of it. Conduct research and attempt to gain as much knowledge as possible on each element that will give you the edge. You're a jigsaw puzzle, so don't focus on one thing at the detriment of another, i.e. getting shripped, but not working on confidence, style, game or finances. By the same token, if your biceps are already jacked, get some symmetry happening and sculpt the other parts of your body that you may have been neglecting. I say this figuratively and literally.

This leads into time (opportunity cost). Improving oneself does not occur overnight, it takes time, and in most cases a significant amount. Understand that it's an investment however, and that the areas that are being focussed on are the right ones, since time is a limited resource. This can be finessed along the way as you discover what areas of improvement you are making gains in, and what areas may not matter as much as you thought they would from the outset.