Post: #1

I've met this girl who seems to have all the attributes I'd want. I've gotten into an exclusive relationship and all is well for the past 3-4 weeks. At the end of this month she's going on a 9 day cruise with her fat, older, virgin sister and it was planned before she met me. Now I understand what happens on cruises, and I wouldn't be surprised one bit if something happens. I have no reason to not trust this girl, but with the lack of communication, the constant onslaught of attention and the lack of time in the relationship, somethings could easily give. So my questions are

How can I find out if anything happens. There won't be a text trail. Should I ask and gage her response when she gets back, or hope she tells me on her own. Id be slightly hesitant about having sex with her right when she gets back, this girl doesn't like condoms.

Is there any solid pre-cruise game I can run? It seems like showing any signs of concern is immediately going to fuck me, but seeming naive also seems weak.

Do I give up now and start gaming new girls so I have some prospects lined up while she's gone and after she gets home?

This may all seem insecure and I'd like to think its not, I put in a decent amount of work to get this girl and feel giving up because of this vacation is a shit play.

Regards

Post: #2

(01-12-2015 08:57 PM)MikeyMikeB Wrote:  I've met this girl who seems to have all the attributes I'd want. I've gotten into an exclusive relationship and all is well for the past 3-4 weeks. At the end of this month she's going on a 9 day cruise with her fat, older, virgin sister and it was planned before she met me. Now I understand what happens on cruises, and I wouldn't be surprised one bit if something happens. I have no reason to not trust this girl, but with the lack of communication, the constant onslaught of attention and the lack of time in the relationship, somethings could easily give. So my questions are

How can I find out if anything happens. There won't be a text trail. Should I ask and gage her response when she gets back, or hope she tells me on her own. Id be slightly hesitant about having sex with her right when she gets back, this girl doesn't like condoms.

Is there any solid pre-cruise game I can run? It seems like showing any signs of concern is immediately going to fuck me, but seeming naive also seems weak.

Do I give up now and start gaming new girls so I have some prospects lined up while she's gone and after she gets home?

This may all seem insecure and I'd like to think its not, I put in a decent amount of work to get this girl and feel giving up because of this vacation is a shit play.

Regards

To directly answer your question, I would go with the "start gaming new girls route." You have what sounds like a case of one-itis.
I always follow the ideology of: If you think she's going to get fucked, she is going to get fucked. And if you think she is not going to get fucked, she is going to get fucked.
Give her space and in the mean time gather up a nice roster so if she comes back and you detect anything or she is not checking in enough as you would like on her trip, put that chica on the back burner and follow up with new chicks in the rotation. Best thing forum taught me " Always have an abundance mentality."

Post: #3

http://www.solvemygirlproblems.com/2012/02/let-go/

Post: #4

She's going on a cruise and you're going to cruise to new heights with other sluts

You have 9 days, skies the limit, start prepping now

Post: #5

(01-12-2015 08:57 PM)MikeyMikeB Wrote:  At the end of this month she's going on a 9 day cruise with her fat, older, virgin sister

Possibly a nuclear cock-blocker right here.

If you had said "pretty/slutty hypergamous bff", then it would be a sure thing that her legs wouldn't stay closed.

Post: #6

I gotta agree with Windom, her sister might be a great cockblocker.

Fuck, I'd have so much fun when she's gone, like they've said, start planning asap man !

Why should you be the one sulking around when she's having fun on a cruise ?

Let her hamster worry about you and going out and doing things every night.

Post: #7

There's no such thing as an LTR kind of girl, just realize that 3-4 was cool, and know to be less exclusive in the future

Post: #8

Just know, if she's going on a cruise, she's bound to meet a lot of Semen.

Post: #9

So given the reality all of you present, do I bail? It seems I should have a great time when she's gone, and feel her out when she gets back,

Is there any clever ways to grill a girl on this shit?

Post: #10

(01-13-2015 01:04 AM)MikeyMikeB Wrote:  So given the reality all of you present, do I bail? It seems I should have a great time when she's gone, and feel her out when she gets back,

Is there any clever ways to grill a girl on this shit?

Take this with a grain of salt, because there's no unraveling most women, who live and think chaotically anyways.

Well you've known her a year, so if she comes back and is overly expressive and being too detailed about too many events or nights on the ship, offering up a ton of info without you asking anything, that might be a tell.

Or just the opposite, offers up every little detail and is extremely vague and seems to have too few events to talk about, generally avoiding convo about the cruise could be a tell too.

As members have posted before on RVF, women have an intuitive way of knowing when you're thinking about them. Who knows, if you actually aren't worried or thinking about her and gaming other girls while she's gone, it may turn out she only chats with a few guys and that's the extent of it.

If you grill her, it's gonna come off as needy and insecure. Let her cut her own throat, most every girl will when you make them feel comfortable enough.

Post: #11

Get new leads while she's on the cruise - to bang or not is your call.

Feel her out when she gets back. If you suspect she's cheating, bang the leads and bang her until you get tired of her. If you want to break up with her outright, make sure you're banging the new leads before you do. If you suspect nothing was afoot, keep leads in back pocket just in case.

G

Post: #12

You are being paranoid.

First of all, the majority of people who go on cruises are middle-old aged tourist peoples who spend most of their time eating a bunch of food, getting drunk and sitting on the deck. The other minority of people on cruises are couples. Yes, there are some people on there that may be normal decent looking where there's a possibility to hook up, but these people are few and far between. Secondly, since she is going with her sister who is an unattractive virgin, it's doubtful this is going to be some crazy wild party anyways.

If you want to be in a exclusive relationship with this girl just do nothing. Don't act overly concerned and just keep in touch with her while she is gone like a normal boyfriend would. There comes periods in a relationship where one of you will be away from the other for whatever reason, it doesn't necessarily mean that person is going to go crazy and fuck anyone because of it.

Post: #13

There is absolutely nothing you can do, in terms of her fucking other dudes on the boat for several reasons:

- No matter what, you will never find out, thats why brods dip to cancun for spring break, boyfriend or not, to "let loose".
- If shes truly into you and values the relationship and isnt a slut, then she will have the discipline and respect for you not to do anything questionable

As others have said above, if your gut tells you she will possibly do something unfaithful, then odds are her commitment to you is a bit lacking.

This is your subconcious mind picking up on inconsistencies in her behavior but your concious mind cant pin point exactly what you are feeling.

Its obvious you have Oneitis, it happens to all of us, but you need to learn to get it under control.

A girl I was dating long distance (does that even make sense), just the thought of her with another guy would eat away at me. What was fucked is the fact that I started thinking about it, foreshadowed the future to come, resulting in me getting dumped by a damages goods toxic brod.

Dont stress your self out about her trip. Either she will cheat or she wont. Either you guys will be together after her trip or you wont. Look at your self as the prize in the relationship, and you will walk at any given notice.

As much as she will be excited to go on a cruise, she should also be dreading your absence for the time of her trip, esspecially in the beginning of the relationship like this.

Signs of suspicion while on her trip:

- If you guys speak frequently, then she has no excuse not contact you daily, even just a mini update of the trip, unless theres actually no wifi
- If shes not saying things like "i miss you" or "cant wait to get home to you"

This all comes back to your gut feeling, if you sense something is off in her tone while on the trip, then chances are you are right.

In the meantime, go out and have fun, as far as I see it, this is your get-out-of-jail free card. While shes out in the middle of the ocean with a fuck ton of dudes(which she knows is mental torture for you, shes not oblivious of that) the least you can do is prepare for the worst and get back on your horse in the mean time.

Post: #14

Deep down you already know what you should do. We can't tell you because we don't know her or your relationship with her. However, the fact that you started this thread leads me to believe you've don't really trust her.

Always go with your gut. Always.

Post: #15

(01-13-2015 02:07 AM)sandman972 Wrote:  Signs of suspicion while on her trip:

- If shes not saying things like "i miss you" or "cant wait to get home to you"

I think the reverse is true - if she is saying things like that, excessively so, it's a sure sign of guilt.

Post: #16

(01-12-2015 08:57 PM)MikeyMikeB Wrote:  How can I find out if anything happens. There won't be a text trail. Should I ask and gage her response when she gets back, or hope she tells me on her own. Id be slightly hesitant about having sex with her right when she gets back, this girl doesn't like condoms.

No way to know. Any technique would be unreliable. See below.

(01-12-2015 08:57 PM)MikeyMikeB Wrote:  Is there any solid pre-cruise game I can run? It seems like showing any signs of concern is immediately going to fuck me, but seeming naive also seems weak.

Nope. Be aloof and non caring (IDGAF) period. See below.

(01-12-2015 08:57 PM)MikeyMikeB Wrote:  Do I give up now and start gaming new girls so I have some prospects lined up while she's gone and after she gets home?

Bingo!

(01-12-2015 08:57 PM)MikeyMikeB Wrote:  This may all seem insecure and I'd like to think its not, I put in a decent amount of work to get this girl and feel giving up because of this vacation is a shit play.

Yes, it is insecure. To counteract, see above.

Post: #17

(01-12-2015 09:31 PM)Sonoma Wrote:  She's going on a cruise and you're going to cruise to new heights with other sluts

You have 9 days, skies the limit, start prepping now

True. If this girl is so super fantastic, she may be your future wife. These next 9 days are your bachelor party and your last chance to bang strange pussy for the rest of your life.

If she comes back and it turns out she's a slut...hey, at least you didn't waste 9 days biting your fingernails waiting for her return.

Post: #18

(01-12-2015 09:24 PM)coverdoc Wrote:  I always follow the ideology of: If you think she's going to get fucked, she is going to get fucked. And if you think she is not going to get fucked, she is going to get fucked.

Which is fucking stupid.

Post: #19

(01-13-2015 03:45 AM)RioNomad Wrote:  Deep down you already know what you should do. We can't tell you because we don't know her or your relationship with her. However, the fact that you started this thread leads me to believe you've don't really trust her.

Always go with your gut. Always.

This advice is key. Guys often hear their gut "rumbling" but hamster it away...and by the same token, don't discount the heavy dose of paranoia that is creeping into your thinking, since you may very well be making an incorrect conclusion.

E.g. When I was in Jakarta late last year, I picked up what I believed to be a massive club slut based on what she was wearing, how she was giving me "fuck me" eyes, and how she was grinding up on me and other girls in the club. I thought I had it in the bag, and that getting her back to my hotel to play hide the shish kabob was a given. Even though I did get her back, she was flatly refusing to in the 30 minute lead up to leaving.

I went absolutely caveman on her in the hotel, and I still didn't get the bang. Turns out she was devout Muslim, and although not a virgin, was "reformed" and not willing to fuck unless in an LTR.

You know your girl better than what I've depicted above, but it's food for thought.

Post: #20

(01-13-2015 06:35 AM)Rutting Elephant Wrote:  

(01-12-2015 09:24 PM)coverdoc Wrote:  I always follow the ideology of: If you think she's going to get fucked, she is going to get fucked. And if you think she is not going to get fucked, she is going to get fucked.

Which is fucking stupid.

Explain why you think it's stupid ?

Post: #21

After waking up and reading the advice here, I'm now in a much better place. I'm grateful this forum exists. My frame has changed from scared onitis bitch, to viewing this cruise as an advantage. I see this as an opportunity to find if this is a girl who can keep from spreading her legs when given the chance. I'd like to think I'll be able to tell if shit went down when she gets back, even if it takes a week or two to surface. Better to find out now then in several months.

Post: #22

The oxymoron of your thread title tells me everything I need to know: You have a case of the onesy's for this chick.

No such thing as a "New LTR". LTRs happen when you have been together for at least 6 months, but you haven't even been together for a month and have already surrendered your emotional state because you consider her your serious gf.

Not casting judgement on if the relationship is good or bad, or if she's gonna fuck around or not, but you've clearly seceded power in the relationship to her. Hope she hasn't caught on yet, did you ask her to be exclusive or did she ask you?

Invert your insecurity onto her and ask yourself this question: Do you think she is going to be worried about you fucking someone else while she goes away?

If not, you're doing it wrong.
If she knows that no matter what she has good old you to come home to, her propensity to mess around will be at an all time high. This is because she knows you're her willing beta provider, thus provoking her to seek out an alpha.

Post: #23

(01-13-2015 01:16 PM)NomadofEU Wrote:  The oxymoron of your thread title tells me everything I need to know: You have a case of the onesy's for this chick.

No such thing as a "New LTR". LTRs happen when you have been together for at least 6 months, but you haven't even been together for a month and have already surrendered your emotional state because you consider her your serious gf.

Not casting judgement on if the relationship is good or bad, or if she's gonna fuck around or not, but you've clearly seceded power in the relationship to her. Hope she hasn't caught on yet, did you ask her to be exclusive or did she ask you?

Invert your insecurity onto her and ask yourself this question: Do you think she is going to be worried about you fucking someone else while she goes away?

If not, you're doing it wrong.
If she knows that no matter what she has good old you to come home to, her propensity to mess around will be at an all time high. This is because she knows you're her willing beta provider, thus provoking her to seek out an alpha.

I never openly let women know my suspicions or give away power, I did it with my first serious relationship and the results were far worse then anything I've ever experienced. Have I seceded power? Maybe slightly but only in the form of my mental well being, she's none the wiser and won't ever be. If she does anything there will not be beta providing, or pandering or acceptance, I will leave and go no contact. As for letting her wonder if ill be fucking other chicks, Ill start that subtle tactic next time I see her and tips would be appreciated.

The reason this issue is coming up is she's playing me perfect (likely unconsciously). She's mixing taking up a bunch of my time, with hands down the best sex I've ever had in my life, by a vast margin. Its hard for me to push back and be aloof when I have her waiting for me on the other side. Also, I met her at a pool hall we frequent where every thirsty motherfucker is hitting on her, its difficult when you see tons of guys making passes to not view her as very high value (even though most of these guys are blue pill fags). Now do girls makes passes at me? Sure. But the frequency and in front of her, is very low.

Post: #24

Let's divide this into two timeframes: during the nine days she's away, and then after she comes back.

1.Does having her on your mind help you in any way, shape, or form?

Just start gaming in her absence, no big deal.

This is standard. I do this when I'm trying out a new restaurant for lunch when the girl I have some form of LTR with is gone for a day, much less nine. Damn. You already know the girl is a smokeshow and she has options. Your attraction is not in question. The health of the relationship depends on you being a boss.

Us finding new leads and adding girls to the backburner is integral to the health of the relationship - it keeps us spontaneous and fresh, while serving to neutralize the onset of beta behaviors and oneitis. And every so often you'll come across amazing girls that will depedestalize your view of your own girl.

By doing the above, dread game will start seeping in and she'll sense it and be more attentive to you.

What is going on right now? You are being affected by her dread game, which is a bad place to be. That's why you got to get out there during these 9 days.

2. After she gets back, use your judgement. We're men. We're smart motherfuckers and we are aware of the possibilities. We're not going to delude ourselves into believing she is something she's not, because we're willing to accept the ugly truths.

If she seems in any way off, make a decision. Or get her really, really drunk and innocently probe when she has less of a chance of lying.

Post: #25

A women giving away pussy is so easy, like breading air. By the tone of your post it seems that you didn't let her know that you'll eventually want to get new pussy every now and then. I'd like to go into details on how you set this up, but I have a feeling that you might be in Oneitisville for this chick, so I'll stick to the basics.

Work on your Inner Game because you really do care that this chick doesn't get Banged when you shouldn't have a drop of care, especially since the relation is Brand new. And absolutely no shame on feeling how you're feeling since we've pretty much all been there homey! Pussy is addictive man!