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How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
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magicone Offline
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Post: #1
How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
I do not know if it was discussed before, but when a man is in a LTR for 3 years already, and the girlfriend (who depends financially on him, and is a HB 8) starts behaving terribly (starts fights out of anything, disrespects him, uses the smartphone to flirt with other men, etc)
how the man can take back the gifts made to her (smartphone, jewelry, etc)
and turn the situation in his favour?
02-14-2015 12:10 PM
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456 Offline
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Post: #2
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
Let her keep the physical items -- just kick her out (if you live together), cut her off, and dump her!

Hard move to make, but the payoff is immense.

Elaborating: often this terrible behavior is her tacit admission that she's over the relationship but not strong enough to forego the benefits and perks. If you can't quell the bad behavior, and she's openly disrespecting you, she's no longer worthy of your heart. Cut it off before she does. You'll maintain hand this way, with her begging to come back if she misses you and realizes what she had, and you hopefully being in the judge's seat and denying (because you will have moved on, at least internally). Not before entertaining a final "take me back" fuck in the process, though.

I don't mean this to sound ruthless or ignorant to whatever love you two shared, but when you eventually DO break up, you'll pinpoint this crux (what moved you to ask for advice) as the clear sign. Men should be more pro-active in breakups.

Leaving behind gifts of "mere" monetary value is a fine reminder of the real value (yourself) you are taking away from her. Also it is more of a high road -- an indian giver is disdained universally.
(This post was last modified: 02-14-2015 12:23 PM by 456.)
02-14-2015 12:17 PM
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eradicator Offline
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Post: #3
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
you can certainly get her cell phone service shut off. Change the locks and leave her shit outside if it as bad as you say. You should have dumped her long ago though before letting it get to this point.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=pla...FO1O020uyw
02-14-2015 12:19 PM
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CleanSlate Online
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Post: #4
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
I would not try to take things back. Consider it a sunk cost and move on, and be smarter next time.
(This post was last modified: 02-14-2015 12:19 PM by CleanSlate.)
02-14-2015 12:19 PM
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magicone Offline
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Post: #5
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
I have been advising the guy the same for the last 2 years, and everyone has told him the same, but he absolutely has no better options.

The situation is the same for the last 2 years, and he is ok with it, because he cannot do any better at all. He is asian looking, fat, 45 years old, while the girl is a simply hot 21 years old cutie.

All his life he banged just rarely and when he "got lucky" he banged just 4s and 5s,
and this LTR is an 8.

He can´t do any better, he just wants to use game to turn the situation in his favour.

The LTR 8 stays with him only because of his good financial situation, while she (HB 8) is completely broke
(This post was last modified: 02-14-2015 12:23 PM by magicone.)
02-14-2015 12:22 PM
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LINUX Away
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Post: #6
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
If:

You intended to make it a gift
You actually gave it to her, and
She accepted it

You can't get it back in most states. I'm not sure about Australia..

Ditch her and move on.
(This post was last modified: 02-14-2015 12:25 PM by LINUX.)
02-14-2015 12:23 PM
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eradicator Offline
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Post: #7
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
(02-14-2015 12:22 PM)magicone Wrote:  I have been advising the guy the same for the last 2 years, and everyone has told him the same, but he absolutely has no better options.

The situation is the same for the last 2 years, and he is ok with it, because he cannot do any better at all. He is asian looking, fat, 45 years old, while the girl is a simply hot 21 years old cutie.

All his life he banged just rarely and when he "got lucky" he banged just 4s and 5s,
and this LTR is an 8.

He can´t do any better, he just wants to use game to turn the situation in his favour.

The LTR 8 stays with him only because of his good financial situation, while she (HB 8) is completely broke


no idea if seeking arrangement is popular in your country, but worth a shot. you need to change the locks and kick her the fuck out of your life. the gifts are sunk costs, but definitely get her phone turned off.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=pla...FO1O020uyw
02-14-2015 12:28 PM
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Sonsowey Offline
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Post: #8
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
Relevant video about these intractable social conundrums




RVF Book Club February: Julius Evola - Revolt Against the Modern World
(This post was last modified: 02-14-2015 12:32 PM by Sonsowey.)
02-14-2015 12:30 PM
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Tigre Offline
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Post: #9
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
You give a gift because you want someone to have something. You don't bestow the gift, then maintain one hand on it ready to recall it back should things not go as you want them to.

So, anything that was gifted is in the past and already hers. It's a sunk cost and can't be changed.

Moving on to how to handle the relationship. He can have a blunt conversation with her. Tell her "I've been sensing some disrespect. Are you sure you really want to be here?"

If she says she wants to stay, make clear what the minimum standards are. In my world, respect, appreciation and tranquility count for a lot. If she can't agree to give him those things, he breaks it off.

Having a conversation like that means being ready for her to answer either for staying or going. He will need to improve his game before he is ready to ask that question in a truly fearless way (outcome independence, abundance mentality etc).
02-14-2015 01:07 PM
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JacksonRev Offline
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Post: #10
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
So the dude wants his bribes back?

There's no such thing as a "gift" that you can't walk away from, unless you're just skirting laws with your local congressman.
02-14-2015 01:19 PM
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WestIndianArchie Offline
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Post: #11
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
If he wants to use money to get his LTR back on track, he needs to buy a iPhone 6 Plus for a cute 18 year old.

The 21 year old may get scared that she's being replaced by a younger model.

Bitch sounds like a lost cause.

WIA
02-14-2015 01:23 PM
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R Smoov Offline
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Post: #12
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
Give her the gift of being alone.

Nope.
02-14-2015 03:46 PM
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Downtown Offline
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Post: #13
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
I broke it off with a fiance once and took back the ring. I just said, gimme that fucking ring back!

I still have it.
02-14-2015 03:55 PM
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HonantheBarbarian Offline
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Post: #14
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
Cell Phones are one thing, but I'd take the fuckin ring back too man!
02-14-2015 03:59 PM
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Tuthmosis Offline
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RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
   

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02-14-2015 04:31 PM
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Post: #16
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
Don't take back gifts you give to people, male or female. That's not being in control - it's just being an emotional cheapskate (or at least that's how it will be perceived).

When you give someone a gift, it is then theirs, so you have no right to it. Giving people shit to reward their good behavior is one thing; gifting something with strings attached is something entirely different.

If you want to harness something that you can give and take as you please without losing the respect of others, your attention and time are the most powerful things you wield, assuming she values them enough. The easiest way to find out if she does is to take them away without a word and see what happens.

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To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling
(This post was last modified: 02-14-2015 07:49 PM by Beyond Borders.)
02-14-2015 07:44 PM
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CJ_W Offline
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Post: #17
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
(02-14-2015 12:10 PM)magicone Wrote:  I do not know if it was discussed before, but when a man is in a LTR for 3 years already, and the girlfriend (who depends financially on him, and is a HB 8) starts behaving terribly (starts fights out of anything, disrespects him, uses the smartphone to flirt with other men, etc)
how the man can take back the gifts made to her (smartphone, jewelry, etc)
and turn the situation in his favour?

1)You can't. (it's ok we all know this "Man" is you, we've ALL been there)
2)Kick her out your house, take all of her shit out, turn off the phone service, let her keep the physical shit,
3)if you can. find a different place to live. . .Seriously, this is how bad you've fucked up
4) NEVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVERRRR do this shit again. letting her keep the physical stuff that you don't have to pay for monthly is your punishment for simpin' out. Live and learn.

5)Do NOT EVER let a girl live with you, period. just don't do it.*

6)find new women, don't let it get to an LTR, just bring them to your place and bang. Don't go on dates, except pre-bang to get the bang and even those dates should consist of going to a couple of bars then back to your place (buy Roosh's Bang and/or Read Tuthmosis' first date bang recipe)

7) continue to bang new women as much as you can

8)don't bring up a relationship EVER. let HER do that, if she never does, then don't bring it up

9)get over the fact that she will be fucking other dudes if you're not her "Boyfriend" I am 100% certain that your current girl has been fucking other dues on the side for months if not years, and is acting shitty because she wants an excuse to get "fired" from the relationship without feeling like a slut. Them's the breaks, let her go and do it right this time.

10) if any of the girls bring up wanting a relationship, just tell her that You're not a one woman girl, you're just looking for fun. Then shut up afterwards. It's in her court after that, if she leaves the let her, if not, then keep fucking her, but DON'T LIVE WITH HER. DONT BUY HER SHIT, DON'T DO FAVORS FOR HER, DON'T BE HER BOYFRIEND! BE the guy who women do favors FOR buy stuff FOR etc. Some women that you bang will just straight up give you shit. I've had women give me money, gifts, home cooked meals etc without even asking! You CAN have more women give you stuff too if you want to go down that road but that's another discussion for another time.

11) If you're NOT in shape, or with a decent wardrobe, work on that.





*Now if you're trying to get married. . .You're probably in the wrong forums BUT, it's best to look into marrying abroad either EasternEurope, China, or SouthEast Asia, or some parts of South America. Yes this means you'll probably have to move to those countries. If you're on this forum and you're not married then you probably already know this and know why.






Good Luck

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02-14-2015 11:45 PM
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eclipse Offline
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Post: #18
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
Eh... You really couldve avoided this in the first place by not giving gifts in the first place unless you know you would be happy losing them.

If she deserves it, and you can, I would probably just "borrow" the phone, then take the ring, then leave if you are in a shared or her place, or kick her out. Actually, the phone is probably more valuable to her than the objective material cost, because she has used it a lot and itd be logistically difficult to get back the progress. In that case, Id just "borrow" the ring.

If you really care what she thinks of you(or if legally it may be an issue), just keep borrowing it for a long time until she forgets about it(may wait months) and only then dump her.
(This post was last modified: 02-15-2015 12:44 AM by eclipse.)
02-15-2015 12:44 AM
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RockHard Offline
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Post: #19
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
(02-14-2015 12:10 PM)magicone Wrote:  I do not know if it was discussed before, but when a man is in a LTR for 3 years already, and the girlfriend (who depends financially on him, and is a HB 8) starts behaving terribly (starts fights out of anything, disrespects him, uses the smartphone to flirt with other men, etc)
how the man can take back the gifts made to her (smartphone, jewelry, etc)
and turn the situation in his favour?

So she depends on a dude financially but they're not married? Sounds like a hooker or a sugar baby. You're going on a game forum asking how to get a hooker in check? How about trying using some game?

Kick her to the curb and cut off financial support. You can always make more money but you can't make more time.
02-15-2015 07:21 AM
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Post: #20
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
If living together I'd suggest moving without her knowledge, kill the lease, move out when's she's at work, lock the place up, put her shit outside, possibly minus whatever you want to keep. Play dumb if she says you have it.

move somewhere new, let her keep the phone so you can text her that it's over. If you don't live together then call it a loss
02-15-2015 09:24 AM
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LAX Offline
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Post: #21
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
Unfortunately despite of all the advice you friend gets from RVF or yourself - he is in a hostage situation and this isn't going to change.

Instead of 'using game to turn the situation' where a c*** is using your friend for monetary value he should, given his background and tendencies, focus on either:
1. Learning game for what it's supposed to be used for
2. Replacing one parasite by another, hopefully a younger, more hotter one.

What's the point of making threats about taking gifts back? She already knows the deal and she knows she has full control.
02-16-2015 11:48 AM
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ManVsMachine Offline
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Post: #22
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
Jewelry is easy, you steal that when she's not looking and they can easily write it off / blame it on vindictive girlfriends or a conniving maid.


I just avoid buying women gifts Big Grin
(This post was last modified: 02-16-2015 11:54 AM by ManVsMachine.)
02-16-2015 11:54 AM
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Old Fritz Offline
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Post: #23
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
Why buy expensive gifts for girls at all?
02-16-2015 11:55 AM
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Post: #24
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
45-21=24

It was all about money unless he's a stud which he's not.

He should abandon her, cut off all financial support simultaneously (best life-shock value), not bit by bit, and sell anything she can't prove she owned.

It was a soft-prostitution relationship sounds like. She didn't fulfill her end of the contract. Should be handled like a bad business contract, nothing else.
02-16-2015 02:13 PM
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Playboy_Extraordinare Offline
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Post: #25
RE: How to take back expensive gifts when LTR starts behaving terrible
STOP SIMPIN AND MAN THE FUCK UP! Any woman that disrespects you is automatically checked and dismissed! You sound like a BETA male who is being taken advantage of without a doubt. Take all your shit back, change the locks, and tell her to kick rocks!
02-16-2015 04:23 PM
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