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Reminding her brother
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Reminding her brother
A really cute 21-year who I had tons of fun said I remind her of her brother. She's really easy going and we shared a kiss. Wouldn't mind seeing her again. How to proceed?
07-08-2015 03:13 PM
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AneroidOcean Offline
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Post: #2
RE: Reminding her brother
(07-08-2015 03:13 PM)Angry Beaver Wrote:  A really cute 21-year who I had tons of fun said I remind her of her brother. She's really easy going and we shared a kiss. Wouldn't mind seeing her again. How to proceed?

As long as you weren't getting the let's just be friends vibe I'd take it as a positive sign. In person you would respond with "your brother must be cool as hell" or "and you remind me of a bratty sister"

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07-08-2015 03:46 PM
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RE: Reminding her brother
Have you tried telling her that you want to see her again?
07-08-2015 03:49 PM
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Post: #4
RE: Reminding her brother
OP..How old are you?

Sounds like your doing fine....Just don't over think it and definitely dont over talk it with her. If you've already kissed then just make it clear to her that YOU don't think of HER as your sister. There's plenty of advice on this forum about how to "escalate" but in a nutshell you just need to build on the attraction you've already built.

Put another way you don't need to come out and say "I want to fuck your brains out" but she needs to be thinking "he wants to fuck my brains out"

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(This post was last modified: 07-08-2015 04:06 PM by PapayaTapper.)
07-08-2015 04:05 PM
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RE: Reminding her brother
She's saying it's an issue and apparently doesn't want to meet me again. Could be a "gentle lie". I'm thinking about using Game of Thrones reference...
07-08-2015 04:09 PM
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RE: Reminding her brother
(07-08-2015 04:09 PM)Angry Beaver Wrote:  She's saying it's an issue and apparently doesn't want to meet me again. Could be a "gentle lie". I'm thinking about using Game of Thrones reference...

Hard to know the truth (cause what hamster will tell you and the truth are usually not the same) with just what you've provided but...it sounds like maybe you didn't escalate fast enough the time you "shared a kiss" and you've been friend zoned.

Worst thing you can do now is give a shit about her. I know it sounds counterintuitive but I'm telling you the more you give a shit the less she will. Cold hard fact. Just search "oneitis" on the forum and youll see what I mean...Lots and lots of advice but I'd suggest you go on to the next one and then maybe circle back to this one later when you care less

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"The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure."
Joseph Campbell
07-08-2015 04:23 PM
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Post: #7
RE: Reminding her brother
Shot away the "you must have a cool brother and Lannisters always were my favourite family on GoT" If she doesn't come around then that's that.

Thanks for the input
07-08-2015 04:29 PM
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Post: #8
RE: Reminding her brother
Did she tell you that you reminded her of her brother after you kissed her or before?
07-08-2015 04:35 PM
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Post: #9
RE: Reminding her brother
(07-08-2015 04:29 PM)Angry Beaver Wrote:  Shot away the "you must have a cool brother and Lannisters always were my favourite family on GoT" If she doesn't come around then that's that.

Thanks for the input

No harm in that. Good luck and happy hunting for the next one!

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- Does She Have The "Happy Gene" ?
-Inversion Therapy
-Let's lead by example


"Leap, and the net will appear". John Burroughs

"The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure."
Joseph Campbell
07-08-2015 04:37 PM
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RE: Reminding her brother
We kissed. She went home. Told her I want to see her again. She went cold, responded almost two days later that I remind her brother and "no go". So probably she found someone else.
07-08-2015 04:38 PM
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RE: Reminding her brother
Perfect situation for a lesson from Uncle Wayne...This is the gospel...enjoy







(07-08-2015 04:38 PM)Angry Beaver Wrote:  We kissed. She went home. Told her I want to see her again. She went cold, responded almost two days later that I remind her brother and "no go". So probably she found someone else.

_______________________________________
- Does She Have The "Happy Gene" ?
-Inversion Therapy
-Let's lead by example


"Leap, and the net will appear". John Burroughs

"The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure."
Joseph Campbell
07-08-2015 04:45 PM
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Post: #12
RE: Reminding her brother
(07-08-2015 04:38 PM)Angry Beaver Wrote:  We kissed. She went home. Told her I want to see her again. She went cold, responded almost two days later that I remind her brother and "no go". So probably she found someone else.

Mindblown2

Didn't you think that would be relevant to the situation as to what advice we'd give you? In the future, give relevant timelines and specific detail of the situation or you can't expect to get good advice.

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07-08-2015 05:00 PM
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RE: Reminding her brother
(07-08-2015 04:38 PM)Angry Beaver Wrote:  We kissed. She went home. Told her I want to see her again. She went cold, responded almost two days later that I remind her brother and "no go". So probably she found someone else.

No worries. We've all had missed opportunities. The trick is to learn from the mistake, move on and try not make the same one again.

ABC ( Always Be Closing...from the movie Glengarry Glen Ross) For me one of the biggest things to learn was "no time like the present". If I'm making out with a chick then I'm going for the lay RIGHT THEN. It doesn't always happen but no way she's leaving not knowing I want to fuck the shit out of her. One of the biggest mistakes I made when I was younger was thinking I was going too fast and was going to scare her off. Bullshit. NOT pushing is WAY worse

_______________________________________
- Does She Have The "Happy Gene" ?
-Inversion Therapy
-Let's lead by example


"Leap, and the net will appear". John Burroughs

"The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure."
Joseph Campbell
(This post was last modified: 07-08-2015 05:21 PM by PapayaTapper.)
07-08-2015 05:20 PM
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RE: Reminding her brother
She responded to brother line, saying "he's the best". Whether good or bad, I responded saying something like "so you're voluntarily backing out of the best thing yet?".
07-09-2015 03:05 AM
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RE: Reminding her brother
(07-09-2015 03:05 AM)Angry Beaver Wrote:  She responded to brother line, saying "he's the best". Whether good or bad, I responded saying something like "so you're voluntarily backing out of the best thing yet?".
Bro you aint listening to what she's saying.... She's DONE and youre chasing her which ONLY makes her MORE done. If you guys made out and she's NOT chasing YOU she's done. The more you try to "sell" yourself to her the more pathetic you seem to her. It's just how theyre wired. You aren't going to "beg" your way into her panties cause guys begging makes her pussy dry

You need to go cold turkey silent on her.

I'd say go at least a month then maybe circle back if you want, but if she doesn't hit YOU up wanting to make plans to see you then what does that tell you?...Think about it

You have a great resource for learning (this forum) There's a lot of wisdom available to you. Like I said before you should search threads on "oneitis" which is what you are in. You'll see there's nothing you can do right now (The one possible exception is to have her see you with another hot bitch)....that's the immutable truth

I wish I'd had this forum available to me years ago.

I don't mean to come across as negative or harsh but like I said...We've all been there. That;s how I recognize the situation.

The good news is there's tons of other hot bitches out there to get

_______________________________________
- Does She Have The "Happy Gene" ?
-Inversion Therapy
-Let's lead by example


"Leap, and the net will appear". John Burroughs

"The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure."
Joseph Campbell
07-09-2015 12:43 PM
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RE: Reminding her brother
I've been family-zoned in the past e.g. "I see you more like a brother bla bla bla"
I always respond with a smirk and say "Well it's a good thing I'm a big fan of incest then"
07-12-2015 10:17 AM
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RE: Reminding her brother
(07-08-2015 04:38 PM)Angry Beaver Wrote:  We kissed. She went home. Told her I want to see her again. She went cold, responded almost two days later that I remind her brother and "no go". So probably she found someone else.

My Nigga. I hope you are young. If so, most of us have been there.

You are on the verge, if not already, of being on the pine for a long time, maybe forever. An orbiter. She hasn't found someone else. You fucked up. Nothing to be ashamed of though.

Let me guess, you "like her"? She knows it? I've had girls in make out sessions with wet panties later tell me I'm like a brother. It's a shit test based on my actions that turned her off. Or she was unsure because I gave her a reason. Either way, it was a no on her part.

It's probably too late to be a rude fucker and say you don't have girls as friends or all your sisters are dead and gone or some other twist cause you're a nice guy to her, but you can still lay out subtle and in her face cues that you're not going to be there to help her move her couch or buy her lunch.

And for all intents and purposes, you are too busy (not unwilling) to do that shit. She needs to be just on the outside of your friend group. You are now acquaintances that see each other regularly with other people around. Nothing more. Unless she gives you attraction signals- then, and only then- you must act on it immediately. Be willing to take the loss. Hold her, kiss her, escalate. If you try and she rejects, your mind will thank you later even though your initial emotions may be disappointed.
07-17-2015 02:18 AM
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Post: #18
RE: Reminding her brother
I'd like to thank everyone for the input.

It was a first Tinder date, I got a bottle of wine and took her to a park nearby , we talked on various topics, I got a nice "deep" solo on international relations in there, but mostly kept it light and teasing. I should have escalated A LOT MORE. That's it. New situation bringing in the brother angle that's all. On to the next one. I love that song.
(This post was last modified: 07-17-2015 07:02 AM by Angry Beaver.)
07-17-2015 07:01 AM
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Post: #19
RE: Reminding her brother
You played into her frame. It's okay.

Best thing you could have done was already mentioned by another member: "I definitely don't think of you as my sister." Even that may not have helped if she found someone.

You just validated her more by pursuing her further, which only helps her, not you.

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07-17-2015 06:20 PM
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RE: Reminding her brother
(07-08-2015 04:35 PM)LINUX Wrote:  Did she tell you that you reminded her of her brother after you kissed her or before?

"So who's the better kisser, me or your brother?"

"Remember my brother died
Remember"

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07-17-2015 06:28 PM
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RE: Reminding her brother
(07-17-2015 07:01 AM)Angry Beaver Wrote:  I'd like to thank everyone for the input.

It was a first Tinder date, I got a bottle of wine and took her to a park nearby , we talked on various topics, I got a nice "deep" solo on international relations in there, but mostly kept it light and teasing. I should have escalated A LOT MORE. That's it. New situation bringing in the brother angle that's all. On to the next one. I love that song.

Sounds like you're in the right state and have this in perspective. Good job. Just remember to go for the lay next time you get to making out. If it doesn't happen, so be it but she won't be thinking "brotherly" thoughts about you.

Also remember this: "Nothing gets you over the last one like the next one"

_______________________________________
- Does She Have The "Happy Gene" ?
-Inversion Therapy
-Let's lead by example


"Leap, and the net will appear". John Burroughs

"The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure."
Joseph Campbell
07-17-2015 08:43 PM
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