Post: #1

I went to visit a psychologist many years ago (probably 10 years ago) and I thought that it was a complete waste of my time.

I couldn't understand how a professional could ask me so many pathetic questions and how he was even employed as such.

I had a close friend that visited a psychologist at that same time and he told me exactly the same thing. He said his psychologist was as useless as it could get.

Have any of you ever received value from visiting a psychologist or get some type of therapy help? I am not sure if UK psychologists are the problem or psychologists in general lack efficiency in their area of work.

I was recommended by a solid forum member to visit a psychologist (about a little issue I have, I have talked about it on the forum before, nothing major) but I am not sure if that will be a completely waste of my time.

It would be good to get some opinions here on what some of you think about psychologists/psychiatrists in general.

Post: #2

There are lot of therapists out there who don't have any real knowledge, but there are those who are real gems. I've been lucky to have found two. The first introducing me later to their teacher. I've been talking with them both for over 15 years now and it has not only improved my life immeasurably by expanding my self-knowledge, but probably saved me in some way numerous times. You could say I became "red-pill", or "un-plugged" during my first year of conversations.

Just keep looking until you find that right person. You'll know when you do.

Post: #3

Research indicates that the strongest indicator of treatment is the relationship you have with the psychologist/therapist. This is referred to as therapeutic relationship or therapeutic alliance, the latter being the title of a book. I was fortunate enough to find a masculine, "red pill" therapist some years ago. My work with him turned my life around. So yes, they can be useful but it is largely dependent on finding the right professional. With that said, the field is saturated right now with other professionals who get licensed without having a doctorate, LCSWs and Licensed Professional Counselors. Unfortunately, the field also has a strong feminist influence which runs counter to the great contributors such as Freud, Ellis, Watson, Skinner to name a few.

Do your due diligence in researching credentials and experience. Ultimately, you may have to see a few psychologists before you find the right fit. Also, I find Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to be the most effective and efficient form of treatment. There is a good thread on the forum about A Guide to Rational Living by Albert Ellis. Ellis started REBT, Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy which is an a strong framework for restructuring irrational thinking. I had the pleasure of meeting Ellis when he was well into his 80s. He and Rogers are generally regarded as the most influential psychologists of the 20th century.

Feel free to PM me with questions.

Post: #4

My high school was threatening to expel me ibecause I kept losing my shit at school, but they were willing to give another chance if I agreed to go to therapy. This guy really "got it." He was this small, soft-spoken older guy and had an extremely humble nature about him, and at first I didn't think we were going to have any connection. Hell, I was extremely skeptical about psychologists in the first place and didn't plan to take it very seriously.

But I quickly realized there was a real quiet, unshakable strength about him. I noticed a difference from the first session in the way I managed my anger.

He had a reputation for doing a lot of work with Vietnam Vets who needed help with PTSD. A good thing to look for, I think, if you want to run into someone who can blend the academic concepts with a feel for how to have a real world discussion with other men.

Post: #5

Yes, they're useful....if you get a good one like beyond borders said.

But, like everything else in life, 20% are good 80% are bad. So you gotta look and try a few out.

Post: #6

I went to a therapist to help me get over my mom's death. She would make commentary about other aspects of my life that I thought were horseshit, but she really did help me through the grieving process.

I think therapists are useful for when you're feeling extremely isolated and like noone understands. A good therapist understands what you're going through and can help guide you through it.

Post: #7

(10-04-2015 01:08 PM)monster Wrote:  Yes, they're useful....if you get a good one like beyond borders said.

But, like everything else in life, 20% are good 80% are bad. So you gotta look and try a few out.

I agree I went to 2 in the past 10 years, the first was a really awkward guy who didn't really help me out much, decided I'd at least go to see him for 3 sessions because one wasn't really enough, it kind of turned out to be a waste of money, although I probably got a little out of it.

The next one was about 4-5 years ago after breaking up with my BPD ex, that guy helped me out a lot, was full of insight, knowledge, and wisdom. He really shed a lot of light on how crazy my ex was from a mental health perspective, plus helped me to see my mistakes, and how I still had a lot of deep seeded issues to work on.

I think going to a therapist should only be if you're in a really rough place in your life, almost like you're hitting rock bottom and need to make a change, or are going through a really turbulent point in your life and need some guidance and you can't get what you're seeking from friends, family, mentors, etc.

Post: #8

Look into Orgone therapy, it's one that prefers not to prescribe prescription drugs.

Post: #9

NLP therapy is pretty effective, its based on brain science and I have seen great things come from it.

One session can show results.

Post: #10

I went to a CBT therapist during and after my divorce. At first I wanted a male therapist and met a few of them, but I didn't like any of them. One was rude and another one wouldn't answer my emails, so I settled on a female therapist in her mid-50s.

She did help me through a rough time in my life and helped get my shit back together. I'd say she's kind of purple pill with a few egalitarian tendencies. While this therapist wasn't a perfect one, she got the job done.

When I was struggling with my ex-wife's shit tests and histronics throughout the divorce process (having her son email me saying "I love you" and basically trying to play with my emotions), I would pour it all out to this therapist and she helped me straighten my thoughts out and clear my head, so I wouldn't make a stupid or costly mistake.

Post: #11

I think a lot of depression problems are really just low SMV problems. I mean, you ever think Ryan Lochte gets sad over life?

Post: #12

(10-05-2015 03:39 PM)civpro Wrote:  I think a lot of depression problems are really just low SMV problems. I mean, you ever think Ryan Lochte gets sad over life?

No at all, actually your comment does not make any sense (assuming that smv means sexual market value). You believe that life revolves around sex and women as if they were the pill to the perfect life.

I am not depressed by any means, actually I live a pretty happy life, my sexual life is 9 out of 10 but I have problems like everybody have.

I don't want to say what my problem is so I am leaving it here.

Post: #13

(10-05-2015 03:39 PM)civpro Wrote:  I think a lot of depression problems are really just low SMV problems. I mean, you ever think Ryan Lochte gets sad over life?

Everyone gets depressed. Rich, Beautiful, Successful people kill themselves all the time and people wonder why? They had it all, so much to live for.

Well, that may be true, but life is suffering and to live more is to suffer more.

Usually we have a place to point the finger to where the source of the negative is. We don't have the girl, or money, or a nice car, house, job, etc. Since we have a place to point the question disappears. The question Epictetus puts forth, "What is it about life that there is always something missing?"

For most there is an answer to that, so the question doesn't linger. However, for the person who has it all they have nowhere to point. No answer to the question, and that can bring the heat of it to un-manageable levels.

If anything I would say people with high SMV or Success or what have you actually suffer more. It's no wonder so many destroy themselves with drugs like the 38 yr old married female doctor of 3 kids who overdosed on Cocaine yesterday. Life for her sucked so much she had to sneak away and do drugs to escape the pain. Probably was having an affair too.

How many times do we hear stories of people who have it all and throw it all away, or commit suicide.

Anyone who doesn't think life isn't one damn thing after another probably isn't asking much from it.

Life isn't easy, and ever person who's brave enough to have decided to be born and go through it deserves a medal of some kind.

Post: #14

(10-05-2015 04:49 PM)pitt Wrote:  

(10-05-2015 03:39 PM)civpro Wrote:  I think a lot of depression problems are really just low SMV problems. I mean, you ever think Ryan Lochte gets sad over life?

No at all, actually your comment does not make any sense (assuming that smv means sexual market value). You believe that life revolves around sex and women as if they were the pill to the perfect life.

Great, you took my 'a lot' to mean 'all'. It's not a perfect pill but it's life's essential vitamin/nutrient.

Post: #15

My 2 cents is there are good ones and bad ones. The bad ones will follow too much of the pop psychology they are taught in school. The good ones will be more intelligent and focus on what works in the real world.