Post: #1

Well

Let's see what people have to say about what they want and don't want of their partners.

I actually read the article itself.
Here are the highlights:

The article starts with stating what we already know:

Quote:Men may desire physical attractiveness in women
because it is an honest cue to health and fertility; and women
may desire social status in men because it signals their ability
to provide resources critical for offspring survival...

For example,
ovulating women may sometimes prefer men higher in subclinical
psychopathy and narcissism

Where have we heard that one before?
Here, here and here.

Picking the right trait is not the only thing:

Quote:However, there may be more to mate preferences than avoiding the low end of desirable traits—people may also have evolved to specifically avoid negative traits. Furthermore,
although positive traits—dealmakers—reflect characteristic
that may improve reproductive fitness, the presence of negative
traits—deal-breakers—may represent even greater reproductive
fitness costs.

Ok.
If some one tells you that there is no "socio-sexual market", have him read the following:

Quote:people transact in mating markets by offering their own mate value while seeking to acquire mate value from potential partners. This model specifies that people who have more desirable characteristics have greater mate value, and thus control more demand in mating markets. Such people can afford to be choosier
regarding both positive and negative mate information

So - hot babes and alpha males "can afford to be choosier".

And I believe everyone here will agree to the following:

Quote:Thus, we expect mate value to be adaptively calibrated such
that people with lower (vs. higher) mate value will perceive
fewer—or have a higher tolerance for—relationship deal-breakers

That is why men, having less options, will not marry, or just go their own way (MGTOW) because why bother?

The paper took 6 studies and analyzed them.
It started with the definition of deal-breakers from 1983 and validate it.
The next one is more interesting, as it found that are less pickier about short term, but almost as pickier as women in long term. The other important finding is that people with higher sociosexual value are slightly more pickier when it comes to long-term and less pickier about short term.
My interpretation - Alpha males care less about hookups than lower value males. Surprising, but can be explained as Alpha male puts less "value" on hookups (If it happens to a beta male he would feel it means "more").

The third study found that as a woman age she has more deal-breakers. Men have some flat u-shape curve.
My interpretation - Female hamster gets heavier with age.

The fourth study looked at context - pictures were shown online to men and women of attractive person and they were asked would they date that person. Then they were told something disturbing about that person, and they were asked again about dating.

Quote:Men and women differed less
than one might expect from a positive relationship partner
preference model, suggesting that both sexes have similar
needs to avoid bad choices in relationship formation

The fifth looked at what deal-makers and deal-breakers were more agreed upon. They found a very (Not) surprising finding:

Quote:people with low short-term mate value have stronger dealmakers than dealbreakers in the short term
context. It may be that those with low value on the short term
mating market focus their efforts in the long-term mating
domain making them more discriminating in this context. That
is, they are more concerned with finding a long-term mate, and
thus have stronger preferences in that context.

The sixth was very interesting to me:

Quote:We expect that people
should weigh dealbreakers more than dealmakers when evaluating
potential relationship partners (friends, sexual and romantic
partners). In Study 6, we experimentally varied the number
of dealbreakers and dealmakers participants saw in a target,
and assessed their interest in the target

The study found that:

Quote:We hold that people in committed relationships
can afford to be more discriminating because they already have
a partner; those who are not can be less discriminating

Just like in the job market. When searching for a new job, you should be working. Then you can screen better.

The finding showed that both men and women have "low tolerance" to deal-breakers:

Quote:Unlike
many mate preferences, which tend to show sex differences,
the traits associated with avoiding low-quality mates appear
to be relatively similar between the sexes. Nevertheless,
women may pay an even higher premium than men do for
errors in mate choice because of biological differences in
minimal reproductive costs (Trivers, 1972). Women often
reported more dealbreakers than men—an effect that was
relatively stable across ages and stronger in long-term mating
contexts.

Don't thing you can generalize so fast. This study has limitations:

Quote:Because all studies relied on self-reports, acquiescence bias and socially desirable responding are important concerns

Also, the general finding is one we know of:

Quote:In summary, we showed that information about negative
traits was adaptively differentiated by context, sex, and other
individual differences such as sociosexuality and mate value.
Supporting both prospect (Kahneman & Tversky, 1979) and
error management (Haselton & Buss, 2000) theories, the
average dealbreaker damaged a potential mate’s evaluation
more than the average dealmaker helped it. This evidence
suggests that natural selection has punished mating mistakes
more harshly (i.e., death, disease, infertility) than it has
rewarded quality mating choices (i.e., living incrementally
longer, having incrementally healthier offspring).

My interpretation - Just don't fuck up on dates. Females amplify every fuck-up and will disqualify you as a mate.
If you don't fuck up - you can get the bang or the relationship (if you so desire).

Deal-breaker are more important than Deal-makers

Post: #2

Quote:My interpretation - Just don't fuck up on dates. Females amplify every fuck-up and will disqualify you as a mate.
If you don't fuck up - you can get the bang or the relationship (if you so desire).

I'd add a caveat, where a guy can do just fine on a date & not fuck up specifically.
Yet, cause hapless guy didn't do X, Y or Z specifically at a specific time (even though he had no idea,
cause the chick certainly wasn't going to detail it), he may still miss out.

Post: #3

- Smelly vag
- Bad breath
- Doesn't suck dick or does it badly to get out of it
- Is an absolute headcase when drunk
- Does drugs
- Whores herself out

Pretty much really.

Post: #4

My number 1 deal breaker is loose pussy. If it feels like I am fucking a bucket of water I am gone.

Post: #5

Kind of kicking myself in the ass right now - not that hard, but this is so obvious.

The lazy thing from the article. Woman's biggest dealbreaker. We all know women are attracted to a guy who's busy and ambitious, but I guess I never put a ton of thought into the opposite also being true. I mean it makes perfect sense - no brainer really.

But I'm often commenting to girls about being lazy or procrastination. I just thought about it as small talk. Something to joke around about.

I noticed the other day though I was talk this girl on Viber though and she went silent after I made a comment like that. I mean, I never did try to hit her up again, and I probably still can, so it's not like I'm sure she completely dogged me, but it stuck in my mind.

This article hit that point home at least, and I suspect that has happened to me before without realizing why. Admitting laziness is like admitting a major weakness. No bueno.

A lot of common sense stuff but still interesting article.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling

Post: #6

Smelly pussy.

I'm a freak about hygiene , and if I catch a whiff of stank down there, I'm gone. I mean, I have to keep going, but all I'm thinking is "I gotta get this bitch out of here as quick as I can."

Post: #7

(12-10-2015 07:03 AM)TheMaleBrain Wrote:  Also, the general finding is one we know of:

Quote:In summary, we showed that information about negative
traits was adaptively differentiated by context, sex, and other
individual differences such as sociosexuality and mate value.
Supporting both prospect (Kahneman & Tversky, 1979) and
error management (Haselton & Buss, 2000) theories, the
average dealbreaker damaged a potential mate’s evaluation
more than the average dealmaker helped it. This evidence
suggests that natural selection has punished mating mistakes
more harshly (i.e., death, disease, infertility) than it has
rewarded quality mating choices (i.e., living incrementally
longer, having incrementally healthier offspring).

My interpretation - Just don't fuck up on dates. Females amplify every fuck-up and will disqualify you as a mate.
If you don't fuck up - you can get the bang or the relationship (if you so desire).

Deal-breaker are more important than Deal-makers

Indeed, this confirms a lot of what I've witnessed first-hand. More and more today guys are being judged as being only as good as their worst quality (age, height, race, etc.), with a stiff ceiling to the amount of compensation game you can run (game, money, body, fashion, etc.).

Post: #8

(12-10-2015 09:15 AM)civpro Wrote:  

(12-10-2015 07:03 AM)TheMaleBrain Wrote:  Also, the general finding is one we know of:

Quote:In summary, we showed that information about negative
traits was adaptively differentiated by context, sex, and other
individual differences such as sociosexuality and mate value.
Supporting both prospect (Kahneman & Tversky, 1979) and
error management (Haselton & Buss, 2000) theories, the
average dealbreaker damaged a potential mate’s evaluation
more than the average dealmaker helped it. This evidence
suggests that natural selection has punished mating mistakes
more harshly (i.e., death, disease, infertility) than it has
rewarded quality mating choices (i.e., living incrementally
longer, having incrementally healthier offspring).

My interpretation - Just don't fuck up on dates. Females amplify every fuck-up and will disqualify you as a mate.
If you don't fuck up - you can get the bang or the relationship (if you so desire).

Deal-breaker are more important than Deal-makers

Indeed, this confirms a lot of what I've witnessed first-hand. More and more today guys are being judged as being only as good as their worst quality (age, height, race, etc.), with a stiff ceiling to the amount of compensation game you can run (game, money, body, fashion, etc.).

and this is also why women love the bad boys etc. My buddy who is very new to game but is like a girls dream check list said something to me like "well when do I bring up that I have kids and am divorced?"

I replied "Bring that up WAY later, only if you actually need her to meet the kids etc". Chicks create their own reality, if they have decided that they like a guy they will rationalize any bad stuff they find out later. I remember having stage 5 clingers that rationalized me moving far away, or seeing other girls to keep up their obsession.

Dropping a deal breaker before her opinion is solidified will shut things down or "scare the cat" as a wise man once said. If a girl seems into you, as in you don't have to initiate or really work at the interaction its just fuckup avoidance.

Post: #9

(12-10-2015 08:22 AM)Dusty Wrote:  Smelly pussy.

I'm a freak about hygiene , and if I catch a whiff of stank down there, I'm gone. I mean, I have to keep going, but all I'm thinking is "I gotta get this bitch out of here as quick as I can."

Somebody please explain to me why women have an aversion to washing their pussy with soap and water?

Post: #10

(12-10-2015 06:29 PM)rpg Wrote:  

(12-10-2015 08:22 AM)Dusty Wrote:  Smelly pussy.

I'm a freak about hygiene , and if I catch a whiff of stank down there, I'm gone. I mean, I have to keep going, but all I'm thinking is "I gotta get this bitch out of here as quick as I can."

Somebody please explain to me why women have an aversion to washing their pussy with soap and water?

I'm pretty sure it's just laziness.

Post: #11

It's mostly diet, toxicity and yeast/Candida build up.

In essence, laziness.

A mate told me once he was with this vegan/tri athlete chick and her vagina smelt like roses and honey. There ya go.

Post: #12

I love sex in the shower - I dated a nurse who refused to have sex in the shower as she maintained that it would screw with her vagina Ph and cause increased yeast infections ... so why they use Ph balanced douche solutions... I still love sex in the shower and so nexted her - she also let her angorra white cat crawl all over us in bed - another freaking dealbreaker - sleeping with her animals.

Post: #13

Without any doubt, the biggest dealbreaker that comes up in reality quite frequently is an entitled and disrespectful attitude; particularly with American women (especially white American women). I can forgive and work with A LOT but I can't stand entitled and/or disrespectful women.

American women seem to think that it's just normal that a man puts up with constant bullshit from them. Several mini-relationships I've had have all ended because the woman thought that now because we were "seeing" each other, they now had a license to up the cunt factor a bit and/or complain about random superficial things. Of course when I dump them immediately without hesitation when the attitude/entitlement kicks up, they are shocked but almost always admit that they know their attitude/entitlement "is a problem and they are trying to get better about it" or they "have come a long way and are still a work in progress." All bullshit.

I suppose being raised by feminist mothers married to beta husbands and/or single moms combined with popular shows like How I Met Your Mother that showcase men being subservient little bitches to their respective cunt LTRs pollutes these women's minds enough to actually think that shit flys in the real world.

The real paradox is that by being a red pill aware/non-bitch man, you will attract these sort of women like flies on shit; a man who doesn't accept their bullshit is irresistible at first. But in America at least, the personalities are so toxic and beyond the pale that it is impossible to keep these women's behavior in-line indefinitely; eventually 20+ years of feminist/anti-male programming via their loser single mother, fat hipster BFF, television, the media, etc will be re-triggered by one or more of the aforementioned.

Post: #14

(12-11-2015 12:10 PM)The Black Knight Wrote:  Without any doubt, the biggest dealbreaker that comes up in reality quite frequently is an entitled and disrespectful attitude; particularly with American women (especially white American women). I can forgive and work with A LOT but I can't stand entitled and/or disrespectful women.

White women are pedestalized higher than women of other races in the United States, not only by men, but by other women as well. Hence the attitude.

Post: #15

So, I took her to my crib and everything went well as planned
But when she got undressed, it was a big old mess, Sheena was a man
So, I threw him out, I don't fool around with no Oscar Meyer wiener
You must be sure that the girl is pure for the Funky Cold Medina