RE: What would you do in my current situation? Lifestyle moulding
Ruivinho, welcome. I'm going to share my experience but first, you've been given some wisdom by Phoenix (a more senior member here) that is very sound. I highly recommend you print out his posts (just his) and read them. With a pen. Mark words and phrases that stand out.
Put those notes away, get off the forum, lift, eat well as you can (quality over quantity) get sleep FFS. Go to your shitty retail job and count yourself lucky for having one. Make the best of it. Make it a point to make a customer smile or laugh, not by being a kiss up but by finding ways to let your real personality shine. If you're charismatic even cleaning toilets will get you noticed. People want to buy from people who make them feel something - either happy or fearful, but I prefer happy (with a little angst thrown in when necessary to prompt action). Don't cry if a customer is a bitch. You're becoming a man, every painful experience is a golden opportunity to humbly learn something you obviously didn't know before. If you can't succeed in basic retail you will never succeed in having a business. First job fresh out of high school I decided to be a waiter. It was so hard I wanted to quite the first day but my folks convinced me to stay and I really didn't want to give up that soon. A stayed a year and it got better and better because I embraced the pain, weirdness, awkwardness, strange customers and just learned to take it in stride. I still apply lessons from that minimum wage job 20 years ago in my business - all the time. It was the best goddamn job I'd ever had, including corporate gigs paying near 6 figures with stock options. Bigger pay working for the man often means bigger headaches. The clever man finds ways to create value as efficiently as possible, usually by paying close to attention to what is and isn't working at various jobs he has or in the world at large. Observe, take notes on what you'd do differently or better. Pick up a book before you take a college course. Think, question, examine, meditate, sleep on ideas. You have to train your brain to be always considering options and never to get stuck in one way of processing - otherwise you will become a drone. Constant and Never Ending Improvement (CANI) is an idea the Japanese hold and is the basis for every Quality man's life.
Then at the end of each day busting your hump, go back to the posts that you most disagree with me decide what you've learned that day that might broaden your perspective. I have found in...a few years of being a business owner / business builder that when I disagree with someone, I'm likely missing out on gaining from their experience. Maybe you'll have to suffer the pains of being young and cocksure - God knows I sure did - but life moves too fast these days to allow years to play catch up.
I'm about double your age. I got a University degree in a STEM field (science, to be specific). Graduated magna cum laude, won two grants while in school. I got a decent job with it, then a good job, then a really good job. Could see the white picket fence, the Silicon Valley dream unfolding before my eyes.
But then I got laid off - as an engineer. Quick a surprise but I felt really calm. Promised a job some month out by a solid former boss - but hearing that quarter after quarter ('no funding yet') got old and after a year I had to do something. But during that year, it was the best time of my life. I worked out, slept better, ate better, learned and gamed better, got a job in a more human-focused industry (what I wanted to be doing) and felt things were all improving. It was but the job would only last a year before I got fired (someone ratted me out to my boss running a totally unrelated side business - what I'm doing now).
I found out that I loved working with cars and that hobby became supercharged with more passion than before. That 'dabbling' became an obsession that pulled me 24/7. I was in my late 20s and still chasing pussy (got laid more being laid off than while working - no surprise, I had more time). But year after year I kept learning new things and few of them related to my industry. My Uni degree helped prepare my mind to learn and gave me some essential concepts useful to my first post-graduation jobs and also my business. But more importantly my hobby/business agreed with my natural disposition and curiosity. I could DO what I was LEARNING as my own creation, but I couldn't LEARN what I was DOING in a University. Some parts of it, sure, but the intangibles - no way. There was way too much that no book or academic could teach me; other the school of hard knocks (when I was dumb) or, even better, other business owners when I was started. Not just jacktards with MBAs or B.A.s in business but other crazy passionate entrepreneurs (and I don't mean some idiot with another dot Com idea that may or may not be the Next Big Thing). Plus I found only those passionate committed nuts could really understand and support me, even more than my family (who did give me a lot of support but more moral and financial than practical). I also met a few women - some the same age, some older - who I learned from and loved (or tolerated). I met even more amazing male mentors who inspired me to greater heights.
"Business" as a profession is not something you can learn in school. I know a 14 year old who is teaching himself guitar (lead and bass) and took no lessons. He's also a fucking amazing drummer, can sing pretty well and is a cool cat in general. He taught himself because he's talented and he's putting the time in. He plays first thing when he gets home, and last thing before going to bed. He outgrew his drum teacher, which his teacher hated. When you reach that point, you'll understand. Until you do, take classes but with an open commitment - you'll learn far more in the real world, outside the safe / sterile classroom environment. Consider it like daygame - there's no faking it, you either approach or not. Whether blown out or number or same day lay, you gotta give it your best and are constantly refining.
You've got to burn with whatever you want to get good at. Schools won't teach you to burn - they'll do their fucking best (especially these days) to put that fire out. Ironically, like how Roosh has been treated in the MSM, they need what men can and do create but like to denigrate those same men. But being a business man is the ultimate alpha. You aren't beholden to anyone and the day you actually can confidently turn an asshole customer away is when you've really arrived, in my opinion. I did that late last year- after 10 years of being in business officially and 6 years very diligently. It fucking felt awesome. I grow every day, because everything in my life shows up in how well or poorly I do on any given day, week, month, year.
In having your own business all your strengths and weaknesses are there for you to see - if you have courage to look. I thought I did but I was lying to myself for a few years (rather raw dog the hot nurse who loved to drop by on her frequent days off). I had to dive into all the vices, including drinking at 10am (never injected or snorted drugs, drew the line there) to see how I could be my own worst enemy. Working for 'the man' gives you a structure that most people need to survive. If you can't be disciplined, you'll have a fucking hard time succeeding in business (because there is no 'how to succeed in business without hardly trying'). The ones who make it look easy have probably had the hardest time and they'll admit it themselves.
Suggested resources:
1. Discover your passion. It's already there, but can you name it? I can. Read and do the exercises in this book: "Is Your Genius at Work?" by Dick Richard. It's on Amazon. Find it.
2. If your passion can be served in part by getting some university instruction, then go for it. But do so cautiously and with a 'less is more' approach. You can learn the fundamental of nearly anything online / via Youtube. I didn't have that 'back in my day' starting college. Knowing that now, I would hope someone would beat the sense into me to not think the University route is the best way.
3. Find someone in your area doing what you want to do and offer to work for them FOR FREE from 4-8 hours a week. If they offer to pay you, accept it but work even harder. This is your real education. I've trained probably 12 people in my business, 99% of whom have moved on. A business owner taking time to show you something is a real investment. We know we'll never get that time back except if you apply what you've learned and don't make the same mistake more than twice. Don't for a minute underestimate the kindness of some older dude giving you advice. He's probably seen and done more in his life than you can imagine. Never judge a book by its cover, especially when someone is humble but obviously successful (to me that primarily means still in business after 5 years and enjoying what they do).
4. Do some kind of personality test / self assessment. Understand your strengths and weaknesses. I like Myers-Briggs, but I also really like Gene Keys even more. The Human Design system is incredibly insightful as well. That's a subject for a lot of other posts, but until you understand your own decision-making process you will be a danger to yourself, your customers, and anyone around you. You will make promises you can't keep or that will stress you the fuck out. Ask me how I know. The Greeks carved on the door entering the temple at Delphi: "Know Thyself." Yes - this.
I could go on but that's the gist of it. The Richards (work)book is gold. Should have done it a year before I did (4 years ago). Helped me understand the value I had to offer my customers and the world at large. Being an entrepreneuer, creating a location-independent lifestyle requires you to be very creative, to see every problem as an opportunity, to develop a network yes but to be your own best network. You have to become self-reliant so others can trust you.
I'm honestly a little skeptical of most Millennials who want to go into business. I hope more prove me wrong but this is what I've seen. Older guys and women tend to be more dependable and less entitled. In this way, if you can buck the trend of your generation you'll be so far ahead of the curve. You can be solving problems no one can see in ways no one could imagine.
Read the classics. Follow Quintus Curtius's blog. Read Emerson's 'Self-Reliance'. I mean print it out, write in the margins and on the back. Make every book you read yours by writing your thoughts. Journal, every day or as often as you can. Write down 10 ideas every day and after a week come back to each one and see what you're excited about working on (pick 3 max at any given time). If you can make progress on any of those 3 in a few weeks or a month and you're still excited, that's a good sign.
Gary Vaynerchuk has a lot of great ideas on business and being a real entrepreneur - look him up on Youtube. For him business is about one thing- hustle.
And remember, you gotta burn!
'100% MAGA' Bill Mitchell interviews military veteran, Patriot, & Q Anon decoder Praying Medic
NeonRevolt.com - incredible research/analysis
Q drops here // Q proofs here
I fixed a leaky gut & got rid of eczema with GAPS diet, bone broth, etc., while avoiding the 12 bad foods
(This post was last modified: 02-07-2016 07:28 AM by Truth Tiger.)
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