Post: #1

First thread for me here so I'll cut to the chase.

My sister(25) and my best friend(29) met and got into a relationship about 5 years ago. Three years later they got engaged.

They 've had their ups and downs, fights and all that, and I tried to help them resolve them.
I also tried to be as fair as I could, and many times I took his side against my sister when I thought he was right.
I tried to red pill him but I know how difficult it is when the other guy doesn't want to see things straight, so I didn't push it.

About a week ago we had a barbeque with some friends at my sister's place (actually our father's). Sister and my friend were bickering a little but I didn't pay much attention because it happened quite often. The more I watched however, the more I saw my friend becoming defensive and withdrawn.

We left together and took the train home.
He then told me that he couldn't take it any more, that their engagement was going south, mainly because of the decline in their sex life and because she didn't want to spend more time with him (he had been asking her to permanently move at his place but she only stayed there a couple of nights each week ).

I tried to give him some advice and help him see things from another perspective but he didn't listen much. I went home with a bad feeling but decided not to push things by asking/interfering more, after all they had gone through fights like this before.

So yesterday I'm calling my sister and hear the dreaded news of the break up.





About their characters:

The main problems with my sister are that
a) she shit-tested my friend relentlessly,
b) she sometimes didn't know when to keep her mouth shut and
c) didn't listen to my advice.

On the other hand, she can be very reasonable, certainly more than my friend, and she really loves the guy. She even tells me that she doesn't want him to spent money for her on presents etc. because of his tough financial situation. She is devastated by the turn of events.

I kept telling her that she should quit testing him like that, he proposed the engagement after all, and all she had to do was prove to him that she deserved to be his wife.
I could see that a big cause of their bickering was infrequent sex so I advised her accordingly (more sex). Apparently she didn't listen.
As for talking too much-too loud there's two or three times that she blatantly and publicly disrespected him (if I were in his shoes I'd break up with her but I haven't told him that). I gave her a talk about it but since my friend carried on with the relationship, I let it pass.



My friend is good guy, I see him almost like a brother, but as you have probably noticed he is fairly blue pilled.

During our talk at the train, he complained that my sister didn't go out enough with him (when she is there she prefers to stay in), didn't share his hobbies and that she wasn't there when he returned from work and he had no one to talk about some problems he has there. He also told me that he had arranged for things so that my sister could go live with him, eg. he sent his brother back at their parents' house, bought her a laptop, but she still didn't want to take the big step and instead she criticised the way he kept his place.

I tried to tell him that, even though we're talking about my sister, women in general and girlfriends in particular are not friends with men and that he should consider himself lucky that she gives him space for his hobbies. Most husbands/guys in LTRs I know, including my father, are the exact opposite, they have too little time of their own.

Sex always declines in quantity, the longer a relationship lasts.

As for the problems at work, he has other people to talk to, male friends (me included), his brothers, his father, colleagues etc., the last person he should look for a solution is a girl, even if it is his fiancee.

Apparently it was too much red pill for him to swallow, because since that time we haven't talked (although when I knew they had a fight I always withdrew a little until things cooled down).



I feel for the guy and I can see how he can be fed up with the shit testing (that's my sister's fault) but on the other hand he is complaining about things that happen in almost every long relationship (less sex,the woman criticizing etc) or he is plain wrong (woman as friend). In a way they are both responsible for this, my sister for pushing too hard and my friend for accepting too much.




There are more details of course but enough text wall, time for the questions :

Considering that I want to keep both relationships intact (even if separate) what would you do in my place, take sides in this or keep your distance until things cool off?
Do you have any experience in this kind of situation you can share, eg. what should I expect, is there anything I should avoid?

Thanks in advance.

Post: #2

Stop feeling bad for a guy that fails shit tests. Women will constantly test you until you show them that you're a man. She'll keep testing that pussy because he won't stand up for himself. Best thing you should do is tell both of them to call it off.

Post: #3

Pull way back. This sounds like a disaster. You could easily lose both of them if you intervene.

No one is going to win in this situation.

Post: #4

Your friend needs Game and Red Pill. Your sister reacts like a normal woman.

Unless your friend learns the basics of a happy relationship - Game and Red Pill, then he will flounder again and again.

If he does not want to learn, then leave it at that. Your friend would require an Angelic woman who does not mind many Blue Pill Beta traits - those women exist, but your sis is not one of them.

Post: #5

(06-03-2017 03:22 AM)Zelcorpion Wrote:  Your friend needs Game and Red Pill. Your sister reacts like a normal woman.

Unless your friend learns the basics of a happy relationship - Game and Red Pill, then he will flounder again and again.

If he does not want to learn, then leave it at that. Your friend would require an Angelic woman who does not mind many Blue Pill Beta traits - those women exist, but your sis is not one of them.

Exactly. Shit tests are testing your manhood. Your friend is insecure. The relationship won't work. She'll cheat on him with guys like me. Sorry.

Post: #6

I would suggest you move to Siberia for a year.

Post: #7

Many thanks for the feedback guys.

Update on the situation:

I went to my sister's place and talked to her. To my surprise she really was rather redpill (too redpill in fact), acknowledging the possibility that she might miss the relationship more than the person, if you know what I mean. Of course, it might be that its too early in the breakup or that she's trying to rationalize the loss, because she wanted to call him on the phone many times during our talk ("I just want to see how he's doing") but I told her not to. From what she told me he's left some bridges of communication.

All in all, she looked better than the way she sounded on the phone.

Best moment of the talk: I was playing devil's advocate and trying to defend my friend saying that he tells her about his problems at work etc. because he sees her as friend too (I completely disagree with the notion of men/women being friends).

Her answer: " I don't want him to be my friend, I want him to be strong".(Today's lesson no.1)

I was stunned. Reading this on the forum or talking about it with friends is one thing but hearing this from her? Guys, your assessment of her was right, my little sister is red pill as fuck! And to think that I was worried she would be in pieces. Score one for women's emotional recovery ability (Today's lesson no.2).

To be on the safe side I am going to be extra careful when I talk to the guy, he started the break up so he will probably be more on the defensive. Red pilling him raw is definitely out of the question.

I can see why you 're telling me to stay away from the whole situation but one way or another I'm going to face the guy. After all I was the reason they met and I am as much of a brother to my sister as a friend to the guy. He stood by me during a break up I had so I might return the favor so to speak.

PS. I was so absorbed with my sister that I only just heard about the London attacks. This is what happens when you listen to women too much (even if they're relatives). (Today's lesson no.3).

Post: #8

(06-03-2017 03:22 AM)Zelcorpion Wrote:  Your friend needs Game and Red Pill. Your sister reacts like a normal woman.

Unless your friend learns the basics of a happy relationship - Game and Red Pill, then he will flounder again and again.

If he does not want to learn, then leave it at that. Your friend would require an Angelic woman who does not mind many Blue Pill Beta traits - those women exist, but your sis is not one of them.

You know, I was thinking of "suggesting" him to read a blog by one Rollo Tomassi that writes about LTRs and game for married men but on second thought I'll leave for later.

Post: #9

Just pull back, focus on your own things and stay out of it for now.

Sounds like you have gently done all the right things and given the right advice.

It is now up to the people involved to take action and make choices.

You can't run this relationship for them!

Stay out from here in, even if that is difficult.

Post: #10

(06-03-2017 03:29 AM)captain_shane Wrote:  

(06-03-2017 03:22 AM)Zelcorpion Wrote:  Your friend needs Game and Red Pill. Your sister reacts like a normal woman.

Unless your friend learns the basics of a happy relationship - Game and Red Pill, then he will flounder again and again.

If he does not want to learn, then leave it at that. Your friend would require an Angelic woman who does not mind many Blue Pill Beta traits - those women exist, but your sis is not one of them.

Exactly. Shit tests are testing your manhood. Your friend is insecure. The relationship won't work. She'll cheat on him with guys like me. Sorry.

Well, if you think you 're more alpha than her, you 're welcome to try

Consider yourself warned

Post: #11

Red-pilling guys is hard. It's almost impossible by definition since you're establishing a leader/follower relationship in which the one you want to be masculine is playing the follower.

I watched The Matrix the other night and this situation has reminded me of the scene where Neo and Morpheus are fighting in the virtual dojo. Morpheus beats Neo and instead of telling him what he did wrong he asks him what he did wrong.

The most powerful changes in your life always come from within, not as a result of someone else pummelling you with truth and facts. When he's coming down off of his grief cycle ask him, "how did she beat you?"

Post: #12

(06-03-2017 08:37 PM)Leonard D Neubache Wrote:  Red-pilling guys is hard. It's almost impossible by definition since you're establishing a leader/follower relationship in which the one you want to be masculine is playing the follower.

How I handle these kinds of situations where telling a person how to improve their life might make things worse is that I just give them a free book. I have given out a few cognitive behavioral therapy books (short ones about 150 pages long) for free to several people who were facing depression and obsessing over unhealthy things.

Best you can do is hope that they read the book and start to integrate the advice contained within into their life.

Post: #13

(06-03-2017 01:00 AM)Splord Wrote:  My sister(25) and my best friend(29) met and got into a relationship about 5 years ago. Three years later they got engaged.
[...]

Your understanding of the events are not accurate and I even would add STUPID to that, you wanna do good because she is your sister and he is your "friend" but there is nothing wrong here, I would even say that's for the best of both to get out of this relationshit as fast as they can because she surely like getting her ass probed with two fingered while getting dick forced in her mouth without the need to give consent, she want to discover herself through a man, one who have a spine she can hold onto not some worm trying to appease her ass each time she throw some fit...

(06-03-2017 01:00 AM)Splord Wrote:  The main problems with my sister are that
a) she shit-tested my friend relentlessly,
b) she sometimes didn't know when to keep her mouth shut and
c) didn't listen to my advice.

[...]
My friend is good guy, I see him almost like a brother, but as you have probably noticed he is fairly blue pilled.
[...]

I could say that your friend is not manly enough, that he should have manhandle her or slap her ass and make fun of her to make her tingle resonate through the whole house but reading this part of your comment make me think that your head will explode once you get your eyes on it, if you think that women don't want to shit-test men, can keep her mouth shut or want to listen to your stupid advices you still got a long way to go...



Go read this thread and never forget that:

(07-15-2016 10:43 AM)nek Wrote:  Any time the apologists come out I think of this quote:
"Appeasement is feeding a beast hoping it eats you last."

(06-03-2017 01:00 AM)Splord Wrote:  Sex always declines in quantity, the longer a relationship lasts.
[...]

What is Love/Hate ?
Blue men keep thinking that "love" will last 'til the end of time...
Is it love that make you want to grab her ass and rip her yoga pants while she is trying to stay fit for you to keep getting hard ?
Is it also love that make you ram her throat as punishment because she talked too much while you were driving back home, fuck her holes then blow loads inside her and have a fucking good laugh about it after...
Is it hate that make you surprise her with hard dick while she was snoring like a lumberjack at 3am and pin her hands until in her mouth and face are loaded because she felt asleep with the kids instead of coming to you ?

Ask those to BP & Women and watch them bug

Dropped some RP knowledge in your friend's ears ? He doesn't contact you anymore ? It was predictable

Post: #14

Give your friend a book by Rollo Tomassi - Rational Male. Point them towards Return of Kings, but the site will likely be too hard-core right off-the-bat. The Rational Male is a better choice. Tell him that this is something that you feel will help the relationship if he reads about it.



There are already audio books out and you can buy them too for him.

That way you do something, but he has to learn himself. There is no need to try to Red Pill him beyond that.

Post: #15

@blck

I know all women are like that, friend, my "objection" was in how often and how publicly she shit-tested/disrespected him, if she shit-tests him when they 're alone it's nobody's problem.

Post: #16

(06-04-2017 04:47 AM)Zelcorpion Wrote:  Give your friend a book by Rollo Tomassi - Rational Male. Point them towards Return of Kings, but the site will likely be too hard-core right off-the-bat. The Rational Male is a better choice. Tell him that this is something that you feel will help the relationship if he reads about it.

There are already audio books out and you can buy them too for him.

That way you do something, but he has to learn himself. There is no need to try to Red Pill him beyond that.

In due time I'll probably do something like that. I agree that red pilling is mainly a personal effort, right now I think I 'll leave them to work things out by themselves.

Post: #17

(06-03-2017 08:37 PM)Leonard D Neubache Wrote:  Red-pilling guys is hard. It's almost impossible by definition since you're establishing a leader/follower relationship in which the one you want to be masculine is playing the follower.

I watched The Matrix the other night and this situation has reminded me of the scene where Neo and Morpheus are fighting in the virtual dojo. Morpheus beats Neo and instead of telling him what he did wrong he asks him what he did wrong.

The most powerful changes in your life always come from within, not as a result of someone else pummelling you with truth and facts. When he's coming down off of his grief cycle ask him, "how did she beat you?"

This! Without inner cognition, awareness and self observation/ introspection the external words are just "advise" while the inner wisdom is REALIZATION!
Gonna try to remember this.

(06-03-2017 11:23 PM)All or Nothing Wrote:  

(06-03-2017 08:37 PM)Leonard D Neubache Wrote:  Red-pilling guys is hard. It's almost impossible by definition since you're establishing a leader/follower relationship in which the one you want to be masculine is playing the follower.

How I handle these kinds of situations where telling a person how to improve their life might make things worse is that I just give them a free book. I have given out a few cognitive behavioral therapy books (short ones about 150 pages long) for free to several people who were facing depression and obsessing over unhealthy things.

Best you can do is hope that they read the book and start to integrate the advice contained within into their life.

Post: #18

(06-03-2017 03:29 AM)captain_shane Wrote:  

(06-03-2017 03:22 AM)Zelcorpion Wrote:  Your friend needs Game and Red Pill. Your sister reacts like a normal woman.

Unless your friend learns the basics of a happy relationship - Game and Red Pill, then he will flounder again and again.

If he does not want to learn, then leave it at that. Your friend would require an Angelic woman who does not mind many Blue Pill Beta traits - those women exist, but your sis is not one of them.

Exactly. Shit tests are testing your manhood. Your friend is insecure. The relationship won't work. She'll cheat on him with guys like me. Sorry.

Yep. When I was at a BBQ last weekend I made out with some engaged chick who basically admitted her husband was being a pussy even though he's the father of their kid. I couldn't smash though because she got cold feet and also probably didn't want to be exposed like that.

Anyways I was a bit worried when I started reading OPs post cuz when he said that his engaged sister was at a BBQ I was like no fucking way then saw the rest haha.

Post: #19

A couple that always fights pre-marriage will always fight post-marriage. It is a great indicator of a divorce. Be thankful that they have no kids together yet, I think it is best for both of them to move on.

Post: #20

Update from OP?

Did it end in tears?