NKD
Banned
Posts: 71
Joined: Aug 2017
|
No connection
Hey,
I'd like some advice. I've been gaming for a while now and have had decent success.
I've alway been very good at first dates, I would say it's my strongest out of all the stages from getting the number to getting the notch.
However, the last two girls I've taken out have came up with the "I don't feel a connection" bullshit. Just for your info: I usually take a girl out to a resto/bar, sneak in the conversation my adventures and life experiences at first and let them talk and qualify themselves to me. I then switch venus to a bar where I start escalating pretty hard and go from there. I'm very good at keeping the conversation interesting and fun, I also always wow bitches. Till now each one would text me after a date how much of an amazing time she's had, that's if I didn't get the notch the first date. Usually happens second date...
Anyways my last 2 dates:
Girl 1: 7.5, when I went for the kiss at the second venue she was surprised and said "I didn't expect you to do that, I felt we weren't connecting". Anyways she wouldn't come back to my place unless "You have to take me out on a second date". We did makeout alot and got very sexual at the end in some random park near my place. Now she texted me out of the blue for a second date which most probably will turn into a bang.
Girl 2: 9 model, sadly she doesn't drink which makes it more difficult for me. I couldn't escalate at all with this bitch, she also didn't want to go to a bar at all. So we first went to a restaurant for dinner then after that to the beach close to her place. Later moved to a park near my place but again couldn't escalate, since she was making it hard for me and at the end she only wanted to hug when I went in for the kiss. FYI: She was questioning me like crazy and viewed all my social media profiles and linkedin to see if I'm worth it I guess. Anyways two days later she sends me a text "Your a sweet guy but I didn't feel a connection, etc..." so I replied "You're right I wasn't feeling we were connecting too, anyways, it's always nice meeting new people. Take care" keep in mind I approached her in the club because she was eyeing me aggressively and then moved all the way to come stand next to me.
I feel I have become emotionally dead! I'm not feeling it at dates anymore, I'm starting to get really robotic for some reason. I'm not excited anymore, I go out on dates feeling like it's more work than having a good time.
I think I lost my charm and humour since life has been tough lately and stress has been getting to me. Any ideas on how to move forward?
|
|
| 08-14-2017 12:18 PM |
|
The following 1 user Likes NKD's post:1 user Likes NKD's post
Built to Fade
|
blck
Alpha Male
   
Posts: 1,427
Joined: Feb 2015
Reputation: 10
|
RE: No connection
Did you happened to "try to connect" with them ?
Similarities bring connection, usually you steer the conv knowing that you'll be able to end some of her sentences then you place some "me too !" when she say something or "That's weird, it seem like I've always known you...", when she says something that you can relate to you place "Believe me, I know exactly what you're talking about, actually same thing happened to me X days ago... Are you stalking me?".
For what I've read 'til here, it's only you signaling values by telling great adventures then go to a second venue and start escalating but, correct me if I'm wrong, the "switching venues" thing is more productive for same day lays, secondary being good at first dates mean that there are second dates and wainting to escalate signals that you're BF material so it might be that you're sending opposed signals...
Sorry to hear that Life has been tough for you lately but you didn't lost your humor nor charm, it's not like you became Mr "always serious always right" overnight, you just missed the validation that you need to keep going and it's putting you down.
Have you ever think about adopting an other strategy that the one you have today, like being "friendly & touchy" with those girls (I mean connect but no trying to fuck them right now) and showing them that you're "Mr having fun, life is boring enough to get overly serious, sex is no big deal I've some whenever I want", flirting with others girls while they're out with you would put you in another category than the one you're in now?
Tell them too much, they wouldn't understand; tell them what they know, they would yawn.
They have to move up by responding to challenges, not too easy not too hard, until they paused at what they always think is the end of the road for all time instead of a momentary break in an endless upward spiral
|
|
| 08-20-2017 11:54 AM |
|
The following 1 user Likes blck's post:1 user Likes blck's post
Built to Fade
|
NKD
Banned
Posts: 71
Joined: Aug 2017
|
RE: No connection
Thanks guys. Ya that model chick was one heck of a golddigger, bragging about how her ex-bf was making over a 100k as an investment banker.. Checking my LinkedIn, telling me how she fucks NBA players and shit.
The first girl, honestly I just lost interest. Now she wants to meet again but I'm not down anymore. I think it's one of my problems, if a girl doesn't get me hooked early I don't try second dates. Not saying first date lay is a must, I'm just saying I like girls with a little bit of crazy in them.. Makes me really interested.
Anyways, yesterday I went out on a date with a very cute but weird chick. I met her walking home on a Saturday night, I asked for directions and a had a short convo then went for her number. So we text back and forth until I get her out and as soon as she sits in front of me she asks "how old are you?" "what do you do" "what's your background" "why are you here" and a bunch of other questions lol. Anyways I give her the answers, we keep talking and this bitch is crazy and does some weird shit (I like that alot). We start to get drunk and at the end of the date she asks "When was your last serious relationship and why did you break up". The whole time I couldn't really escalate because she was sitting on the other side of the table, and she didn't seem like she was making it easy for me.
I try to avoid the last question but she keeps bringing it up again and again! Untill I gave her a very vague answer (I never really had serious relationships except one that turned LD that I don't count, I'm 26 btw). She orders the bill (really bad sign for me) and we go out walk a little then at the crossroads she says "I'm going this way and you the other way" so I'm like "oh ya np" then she says "are we gona wave goodbye or hug".. I give her the damn hug and walk away confused.
I used to nail dates with all kinds of girls. At the end of the date I'd have the girl wanting my dick so bad and if I didn't get the lay they would text me how much of an amazing time they had and cant wait to meet up again. However, last night's girl didn't text and I kinda know when shit is not gona move forward. Sadly I've lost it, I even feel different during dates.
|
|
| 08-22-2017 11:34 AM |
|
The following 1 user Likes NKD's post:1 user Likes NKD's post
Built to Fade
|