Post: #1

I searched for this and didn't see much on it so wanted to start a discussion so that I could gather more ideas for how to Help add more value for the women I date, want to date, or spend time with. Also, I was curious about other training methods that men use.

So this topic stems from a couple different things and is best illustrated by examples:

1) Sexually - I've met women that are great at giving BJ's and women that are not as good at it. It would seem like the ones that are good were trained by an Ex at some point to be really good at doing it (or self-taught). I never trained any of my exes to get better and just kind of enjoyed what they provided instead. I feel like this is something where I can derive a lot of value-add from the girls I'm seeing by investing a little bit in them.
Additionally, any sexual training such as learning how to ride really well. One of my past FWB was very very good at riding me. However, all of the girls I've been seeing after her aren't as good and I've tried some light training methods such as small adjustments but nothing too severe to make those substantial changes (such as showing them how it's done properly in porn). I was wondering if other guys do this and if women react positively to it.

2) Mentally - This can be a plethora of things but I was wondering if other men helped their women with self-esteem/confidence or any other mental attributes. Do other people try to get women to see their point of view or just leave it alone?

Daddy Game Method - This is one of the classic examples of what I would like to learn from this thread. I read the thread on Daddy game and having the girls call me Daddy and I've gotten positive reactions from it and can see how this can mentally train a girl to be more loyal towards you.

I was also wondering about additional things that people may do to mentally train a girl to be compatible with your lifestyle/mindset.

3) Life - Well my target market is typically 18-24 (I'm 26), so some of these girls may be in college and undecided with what they want to do. Sometimes I offer them guidance on jobs such as pharmacists, dentists, real estate agent, modeling, etc. depending on how smart I think they are, work ethic, etc. But at the same time, I'm a little bit conflicted because if it doesn't work out, the blame could later come back to me or if they hate their job. Also, sometimes I'm unsure if I should influence their life strongly like that, or let them be and take their natural course.

Gym - This is a part of life and I definitely understand that most guys probably want their LTR to hit the gym and help them ignite that process if needed. However, what about Long term friends with benefits if you think they'll be around a while but not good enough to marry? Is it worth making that investment into teaching them?


TLDR; Im wondering what investments are worth making into women such as teaching them how to workout, or career advice, sexual advice, etc. and wether that advice is worth it only on long term, short term, medium term, or just all women.

Another facet is I've got a girl thats an 8 in looks and very moldable and open to learning about anything. I feel like a lot of girls are open to learning like this, and I was wondering what all she needs to be taught to turn into a great LTR. Such as cooking and how to go about it.

Post: #2

I've trained every girl sexually. Most girls are dying to be submissive. No girl comes to the table knowing exactly what you want and how fast and how long and in what position in which heels.

Post: #3

(09-26-2017 04:33 PM)DonnyGately Wrote:  I've trained every girl sexually. Most girls are dying to be submissive. No girl comes to the table knowing exactly what you want and how fast and how long and in what position in which heels.

After how long? Do you start training them right away? For example if they're riding you do you start dominating right away and telling them how fast, to slow down, to not kiss you while they ride you, etc. (unless you like it). Or after its a consistent thing?

Post: #4

I do to them exactly what I want to do, and I tell them exactly how I want them to do things if needed.

Sex is mostly physical, you put the girl's body where you want it they pick it up pretty quick. Yes, if I want her to go faster or slower I say so. If I want them to stop talking I gag them or tell them to be quiet. Etc.

Yes, right away. Girls want to please you. They're deathly afraid of you losing your erection or not coming because they're not sexy enough or bad at sex. They're also mostly willing to try anything. And you know chicks - afterwards if they have questions, they'll certainly ask in one fashion or another.

If they don't respond positively to it [has never happened to me] I would next them and move on. Life's too short.

Post: #5

Great thread idea.

I train my girls to always look their best at all times when their around me. When I can tell they put in real thought to their appearence, I let them know both verbally and sexually. When they don't, I don't complement their appearance at all (maybe even say something like "I don't like that dress, it doesn't complement you well") and let them initiate sex.

They usually get the point quickly. A womans level of effort into her appearance is a direct reflection of the level of respect she has for her man, and women know this.

Post: #6

Most women are crap at sex, not really making the effort to watch a few vids, experiment and learn what you like.

Especially the hot ones, they think all they have to do is turn up.

It gets tiresome teaching them to please me all the time, I want to bang not coach.

Post: #7

I met a girl earlier this year who was constantly swearing, but otherwise a good company. I introduced a "rude words box" where she has to put half a dollar everytime she says fuck. Told her I'll invite her to dinner as soon as she's put enough cash inside. After 5$ she stopped swearing.
I left her city and met her two months later. She did not swear anymore that time.

Post: #8

(09-26-2017 06:54 PM)RatInTheWoods Wrote:  Most women are crap at sex, not really making the effort to watch a few vids, experiment and learn what you like.

Especially the hot ones, they think all they have to do is turn up.

It gets tiresome teaching them to please me all the time, I want to bang not coach.

This is a big issue for me. So much work to get a girl into bed and then she's a 3/10 in bed.

Post: #9

Miss Abernathy's Concise Slave Training Manual is a very short read that was originally for BDSM/KINK but has solid principles on how to train a woman. Parts of whats taught are things I already knew, but the things I learned were profound. Specifically, Voice Commands and Postures.

I’m an avid reader and I look for anything that's been demonstratively proven to work, this was referred to me by someone I trust and it did not disappoint!

The only thing I specifically disagree with is “contracts”. Under no circumstance should you (or I) ever write anything down. All contracts and agreements should be verbal.

Just google "Miss Abernathy's Concise Slave Training Manual, .pdf” to find a download or torrent.

Other Reviews:
http://www.amazon.com/Abernathys-Concise...0963976397

http://www.amazon.com/Abernathys-Concise...0963976397

Post: #10

(09-26-2017 08:41 PM)Kwisatz Wrote:  Miss Abernathy's Concise Slave Training Manual is a very short read that was originally for BDSM/KINK but has solid principles on how to train a woman. Parts of whats taught are things I already knew, but the things I learned were profound. Specifically, Voice Commands and Postures.

I’m an avid reader and I look for anything that's been demonstratively proven to work, this was referred to me by someone I trust and it did not disappoint!

The only thing I specifically disagree with is “contracts”. Under no circumstance should you (or I) ever write anything down. All contracts and agreements should be verbal.

Just google "Miss Abernathy's Concise Slave Training Manual, .pdf” to find a download or torrent.

Other Reviews:
http://www.amazon.com/Abernathys-Concise...0963976397

http://www.amazon.com/Abernathys-Concise...0963976397

This post alongside your post of Cold Reading makes me think you are an expert at the dark side of gaming women and hitting their emotional buttons. Do you have anymore good reads in your collection?

Post: #11

(09-26-2017 06:09 PM)Repo Wrote:  Great thread idea.

I train my girls to always look their best at all times when their around me. When I can tell they put in real thought to their appearence, I let them know both verbally and sexually. When they don't, I don't complement their appearance at all (maybe even say something like "I don't like that dress, it doesn't complement you well") and let them initiate sex.

They usually get the point quickly. A womans level of effort into her appearance is a direct reflection of the level of respect she has for her man, and women know this.

Thanks man! This was actually the type of thing I was looking for as well. My very first LTR in college was a couple years and she definitely stopped putting in the effort and got comfortable. I would tell her once in a while I like when she looks nice for me, but I didn't use the right methods. Will start employing this tactic now to make sure they don't start slipping.

(09-26-2017 06:54 PM)RatInTheWoods Wrote:  Most women are crap at sex, not really making the effort to watch a few vids, experiment and learn what you like.

Especially the hot ones, they think all they have to do is turn up.

It gets tiresome teaching them to please me all the time, I want to bang not coach.

So....do you just not coach then or do you still do it? If so, do you start watching porn with them to show them? Looking for a nice way to do this without putting them down too much that they suck. I think I've got the jist of how I would approach it, but always good to explore other peoples ideas.

(09-26-2017 08:15 PM)Selembao Wrote:  I met a girl earlier this year who was constantly swearing, but otherwise a good company. I introduced a "rude words box" where she has to put half a dollar everytime she says fuck. Told her I'll invite her to dinner as soon as she's put enough cash inside. After 5$ she stopped swearing.
I left her city and met her two months later. She did not swear anymore that time.

Good idea! A girl swearing also turns me off. Another good one to implement if its a problem

(09-26-2017 08:41 PM)Kwisatz Wrote:  Miss Abernathy's Concise Slave Training Manual is a very short read that was originally for BDSM/KINK but has solid principles on how to train a woman. Parts of whats taught are things I already knew, but the things I learned were profound. Specifically, Voice Commands and Postures.

I’m an avid reader and I look for anything that's been demonstratively proven to work, this was referred to me by someone I trust and it did not disappoint!

The only thing I specifically disagree with is “contracts”. Under no circumstance should you (or I) ever write anything down. All contracts and agreements should be verbal.

Just google "Miss Abernathy's Concise Slave Training Manual, .pdf” to find a download or torrent.

Other Reviews:
http://www.amazon.com/Abernathys-Concise...0963976397

http://www.amazon.com/Abernathys-Concise...0963976397

I've never really been into the BDSM as I don't really enjoy it much, but have always appreciated/admired the control and loyalty that it can build. Ill give it a read tho, I'm looking for a way to build that loyalty with 7's/8's/9's so that they keep coming back whenever I ask them, without having to put in all the effort into BDSM techniques every time we have sex.

Post: #12

If they do something I like, I tell them I like that and they usually remember that I was a fan of it. I'll physically guide them to positions that I like, and tell them what speed is good if I think I need too.


Coaching blow jobs is a bit harder than coaching sex though, with some girls you pretty much have to tell them they suck.

Post: #13

Spanking on the ass as punishment for bad behaviour.
She has to agree to it voluntarily.
This means when I spank her ass, I never hold her down and I never force her physically.
Some are quite shocked when I tell them this. It takes them a while to realise I'm not joking.
Those that don't agree are told to chose between the ass spanking and leaving via the door.

So far, not a single girl has chosen the door.

Post: #14

You ask before ass spanking?

"

Post: #15

Most young girls have no idea how to dress properly. I seek out the ones that do but certainly instruct the ones that do not. Some of the outfits that have shown up on first dates....smdh. If your jeans have more holes than fabric, you're gonna need to listen up quick.

Post: #16

I will pull up a few things.

(09-26-2017 09:33 PM)Iso Wrote:  

(09-26-2017 08:41 PM)Kwisatz Wrote:  Miss Abernathy's Concise Slave Training Manual is a very short read that was originally for BDSM/KINK but has solid principles on how to train a woman. Parts of whats taught are things I already knew, but the things I learned were profound. Specifically, Voice Commands and Postures.

I’m an avid reader and I look for anything that's been demonstratively proven to work, this was referred to me by someone I trust and it did not disappoint!

The only thing I specifically disagree with is “contracts”. Under no circumstance should you (or I) ever write anything down. All contracts and agreements should be verbal.

Just google "Miss Abernathy's Concise Slave Training Manual, .pdf” to find a download or torrent.

Other Reviews:
http://www.amazon.com/Abernathys-Concise...0963976397

http://www.amazon.com/Abernathys-Concise...0963976397

This post alongside your post of Cold Reading makes me think you are an expert at the dark side of gaming women and hitting their emotional buttons. Do you have anymore good reads in your collection?

Post: #17

(09-27-2017 06:41 PM)Repo Wrote:  You ask before ass spanking?

Where do you see the word "ask" in my previous post ?
Nowhere.

You don't get it man.

There is a film called "Secretary" from 2002 starring Maggie Gyllenhaal and James Spader. If you go on any website talking about that film, you will see its always full of comments from women about how fucking turned on they are by some scenes in that movie.

Here is the correct way to spank your girl's ass when she misbehaves badly:







Notice that he just tells her what do in a strong & firm way...but he never holds her down and never physically forces her, and she is free to leave whenever she wants....but never does.



...

Post: #18

When you said "agreed", to me ask was implied. Understand now

Post: #19

(09-26-2017 04:33 PM)DonnyGately Wrote:  I've trained every girl sexually. Most girls are dying to be submissive. No girl comes to the table knowing exactly what you want and how fast and how long and in what position in which heels.

I'd second that.

Honestly I do not consciously 'train' any girl, but I am used to being dominant in bed, so I do it even on one night stands and the like.

This usually means that girls pick it up very quickly. Mostly because they love it.

Post: #20

The film above is interesting. There is a scene where she makes typos on purpose so she can get another good spanking.

Another film to check out is 9 1/2 weeks.

But the place to start is with yourself. Instead of asking girls assume the sale and tell them. Compare Are you available this week? with Meet me for Margaritas at Titos Thursday 730 baby. Do you say, where would you like to have dinner or You're having Italian with me; wear that short black dress I saw on your FB and the tallest heels you have.

When you walk through a restaurant, hold her hand and walk in front of her and lead her.

You need to practice this and make it a habit. Its most important in small details, because that is how she accepts that you are her leader.

Think for a moment if you were a kindergarten teacher. Would you ask your kids do you want to play tag or kickball? Would it be worth your time to ask their opinion? Their opinion really doesn't matter. Tell them OK everybody we're going outside to play tag!! They'll readily follow you. If you ask their opinion, at best you'll get chaos and at worst they'll resent you for forcing them to make the decision. In a remarkable number of contexts, you'll have more success by interacting with them in this frame. I say things like be a good girl and text me a picture for my contacts. Ooh, I like that. Now send me one where I can see your waist. Depending on how they respond I sometimes end up with lingerie or even nudes before I have even met them. That sort accelerates the dating process.

But you don't get this unless you ask. And you can't ask unless you have trained yourself to lead in every detail.

The one caveat is it won't work all the time in every situation. You have to be congruent and dial it up and down depending on the context. But I don't want to be with a woman who argues about where we are eating. I want one that says Thank you Daddy for taking me to dinner; I'm going to show my appreciation by wearing that outfit you like.

When you get used to interacting this way, you can throw in some reverse psychology. I have a few things I really like, like choker collars and over the knee boots. If I know a girl has these from other pics I have seen, I'll sexualize the interaction by saying something like "Wear those boots and that choker collar for me NAME. I'm a big boy and can control myself. Probably. So when they get this they know if they want a sexualized meeting they are going to wear exactly what I like. When I meet them I give them a long hug and smile, then I study their body and ask them to turn around so I can enjoy what they picked out for me. She spent an hour getting ready for you so the least you can do is give her a good amount of validation. Asking her to turn and model what she wore for you while you take in her beauty will make her feel better than anything you can buy her or say to her. The gift (one of them anyway) she has to give you is her beauty, and you are accepting it and demonstrating that you appreciate it.

I haven't read Kwisatz' material but this brother knows his shit and I'm looking forward to his reading list. But I'm guessing its pretty advanced stuff. In contrast, you can have substantial improvement in your interactions with women by focussing on your language.

As an exercise, go through some old texts and see how many times you were asking questions instead of assuming a sale. Even if you don't have all the info, you can still speak directly. Instead would you like to go out some day this week, say instead Babe I need to see you this week. Tell me what days you can see me.

Post: #21

(09-26-2017 08:41 PM)Kwisatz Wrote:  Miss Abernathy's Concise Slave Training Manual is a very short read that was originally for BDSM/KINK but has solid principles on how to train a woman. Parts of whats taught are things I already knew, but the things I learned were profound. Specifically, Voice Commands and Postures.

I’m an avid reader and I look for anything that's been demonstratively proven to work, this was referred to me by someone I trust and it did not disappoint!

The only thing I specifically disagree with is “contracts”. Under no circumstance should you (or I) ever write anything down. All contracts and agreements should be verbal.

Just google "Miss Abernathy's Concise Slave Training Manual, .pdf” to find a download or torrent.

Other Reviews:
http://www.amazon.com/Abernathys-Concise...0963976397

http://www.amazon.com/Abernathys-Concise...0963976397

I tried to get this pdf and failed for a while.

If anybody is interested, the only place I could get it was on a torrent named 'Femdom D/s collected from a variety of sources - v7'.

Enjoy!

(just be warned that this is a 'femdom' collection of pdfs, so more than half of them are useless for us - I'm currently purging some of this material)

Post: #22

(09-28-2017 04:59 AM)Hypno Wrote:  The film above is interesting. There is a scene where she makes typos on purpose so she can get another good spanking.

Another film to check out is 9 1/2 weeks.

But the place to start is with yourself. Instead of asking girls assume the sale and tell them. Compare Are you available this week? with Meet me for Margaritas at Titos Thursday 730 baby. Do you say, where would you like to have dinner or You're having Italian with me; wear that short black dress I saw on your FB and the tallest heels you have.

When you walk through a restaurant, hold her hand and walk in front of her and lead her.

You need to practice this and make it a habit. Its most important in small details, because that is how she accepts that you are her leader.

Think for a moment if you were a kindergarten teacher. Would you ask your kids do you want to play tag or kickball? Would it be worth your time to ask their opinion? Their opinion really doesn't matter. Tell them OK everybody we're going outside to play tag!! They'll readily follow you. If you ask their opinion, at best you'll get chaos and at worst they'll resent you for forcing them to make the decision. In a remarkable number of contexts, you'll have more success by interacting with them in this frame. I say things like be a good girl and text me a picture for my contacts. Ooh, I like that. Now send me one where I can see your waist. Depending on how they respond I sometimes end up with lingerie or even nudes before I have even met them. That sort accelerates the dating process.

But you don't get this unless you ask. And you can't ask unless you have trained yourself to lead in every detail.

The one caveat is it won't work all the time in every situation. You have to be congruent and dial it up and down depending on the context. But I don't want to be with a woman who argues about where we are eating. I want one that says Thank you Daddy for taking me to dinner; I'm going to show my appreciation by wearing that outfit you like.

When you get used to interacting this way, you can throw in some reverse psychology. I have a few things I really like, like choker collars and over the knee boots. If I know a girl has these from other pics I have seen, I'll sexualize the interaction by saying something like "Wear those boots and that choker collar for me NAME. I'm a big boy and can control myself. Probably. So when they get this they know if they want a sexualized meeting they are going to wear exactly what I like. When I meet them I give them a long hug and smile, then I study their body and ask them to turn around so I can enjoy what they picked out for me. She spent an hour getting ready for you so the least you can do is give her a good amount of validation. Asking her to turn and model what she wore for you while you take in her beauty will make her feel better than anything you can buy her or say to her. The gift (one of them anyway) she has to give you is her beauty, and you are accepting it and demonstrating that you appreciate it.

I haven't read Kwisatz' material but this brother knows his shit and I'm looking forward to his reading list. But I'm guessing its pretty advanced stuff. In contrast, you can have substantial improvement in your interactions with women by focussing on your language.

As an exercise, go through some old texts and see how many times you were asking questions instead of assuming a sale. Even if you don't have all the info, you can still speak directly. Instead would you like to go out some day this week, say instead Babe I need to see you this week. Tell me what days you can see me.

Quality content. I've gotta train myself into this mentality as well. Im definitely the type thats always asked what day they're free this week, and have never really asked girls to turn around. I suppose I play a lot of safe game and don't fuck it up game, but I also have very high turnover which is what I'm trying to focus on preventing now. I think these things might help out. Thanks!

(09-28-2017 07:24 AM)mensch Wrote:  

(09-26-2017 08:41 PM)Kwisatz Wrote:  Miss Abernathy's Concise Slave Training Manual is a very short read that was originally for BDSM/KINK but has solid principles on how to train a woman. Parts of whats taught are things I already knew, but the things I learned were profound. Specifically, Voice Commands and Postures.

I’m an avid reader and I look for anything that's been demonstratively proven to work, this was referred to me by someone I trust and it did not disappoint!

The only thing I specifically disagree with is “contracts”. Under no circumstance should you (or I) ever write anything down. All contracts and agreements should be verbal.

Just google "Miss Abernathy's Concise Slave Training Manual, .pdf” to find a download or torrent.

Other Reviews:
http://www.amazon.com/Abernathys-Concise...0963976397

http://www.amazon.com/Abernathys-Concise...0963976397

I tried to get this pdf and failed for a while.

If anybody is interested, the only place I could get it was on a torrent named 'Femdom D/s collected from a variety of sources - v7'.

Enjoy!

(just be warned that this is a 'femdom' collection of pdfs, so more than half of them are useless for us - I'm currently purging some of this material)

Much appreciated, I used your link to DL it as well

Post: #23

(09-28-2017 04:59 AM)Hypno Wrote:  But the place to start is with yourself. Instead of asking girls assume the sale and tell them. Compare Are you available this week? with Meet me for Margaritas at Titos Thursday 730 baby. Do you say, where would you like to have dinner or You're having Italian with me; wear that short black dress I saw on your FB and the tallest heels you have.

When you walk through a restaurant, hold her hand and walk in front of her and lead her.

You need to practice this and make it a habit. Its most important in small details, because that is how she accepts that you are her leader.

Think for a moment if you were a kindergarten teacher. Would you ask your kids do you want to play tag or kickball? Would it be worth your time to ask their opinion? Their opinion really doesn't matter. Tell them OK everybody we're going outside to play tag!! They'll readily follow you. If you ask their opinion, at best you'll get chaos and at worst they'll resent you for forcing them to make the decision. In a remarkable number of contexts, you'll have more success by interacting with them in this frame. I say things like be a good girl and text me a picture for my contacts. Ooh, I like that. Now send me one where I can see your waist. Depending on how they respond I sometimes end up with lingerie or even nudes before I have even met them. That sort accelerates the dating process.

But you don't get this unless you ask. And you can't ask unless you have trained yourself to lead in every detail.

The one caveat is it won't work all the time in every situation. You have to be congruent and dial it up and down depending on the context. But I don't want to be with a woman who argues about where we are eating. I want one that says Thank you Daddy for taking me to dinner; I'm going to show my appreciation by wearing that outfit you like.

Gold. +1

Post: #24

(09-27-2017 07:18 PM)Mercenary Wrote:  Here is the correct way to spank your girl's ass when she misbehaves badly:





Notice that he just tells her what do in a strong & firm way...but he never holds her down and never physically forces her, and she is free to leave whenever she wants....but never does.

Literally just did this with the LTR.

She was acting out a little bit yesterday but had a medical test coming up, so I ignored it. Then after the medical test was fine, she acted up again. Not as significantly as earlier, but I didn't like her tone asking me to hurry in the shower and she was off-center anyway: we weren't late at all, she was just venting anxiety.

When I got out, I took my time drying off and asked her if she thought she needed to apologize. Instead, she had a fit, so I told her we weren't going anywhere and that she'd have to cancel. That just shut her down but she didn't want to leave, and I let her sleep over cranky, without giving her any attention. I'd already banged earlier that evening and wasn't worried about it. Before we went to sleep she tried to talk about it and make excuses for snapping, blame me for blowing it out of proportion and ruining the evening, but I just told her she isn't going to act like that and that all she had to do to save the evening was apologize right away and it would have been fine.

Sure enough, in the morning, she got up and made coffee, and when I came down and asked her how she was doing, she apologized for snapping, very sincerely and sweetly. Then she tried to qualify it: "I just have a, b, and c stressing me out", told her I know, and care, but that has nothing to do with acting out. "I do x, y, and z to show you I care about you", yes you do, but that isn't credit toward being shitty. Stop making excuses. "Love you," I'm glad that you apologized.

Then cuddled her a little bit and banged her out on the couch. Right after she tried to get away to go for some more coffee and that's when I stopped her and bent her over my knee, and told her I was glad we'd made up but that she still needed to be disciplined for acting up. She knew what was going on but instead of asking me not to, protested the nurse gave her a shot yesterday and it still hurt. "Which side?"

She told me, so I went went for the other side. She was giggling for the first ten but I was hitting her hard enough to hurt and make her yelp, then she asked me how many she was getting. Ignored. Asked me again at fifteen. Ignored. Then at twenty she asked again and wasn't laughing anymore. I'd already decided to let her go get her coffee at twenty-five. Calmed her right the fuck down for the day.

OP has to send the message that "nothing is going to work" to escape compliance if she wants the relationship.

Post: #25

This is good a training exercise...and you both get to drink beer while doing it