Post: #1

An old co worker of mine (one whom I have not kept contact with for 3 years) sent me a msg on Facebook last weekend randomly. We spoke Monday and caught up on life etc. Since we worked together, she has divorced, moved to NYC for her job (and bf at the time), that relationship dissolved, and now is moving to DC for her job.

We never had any prior sexual relationship, as I was in a LTR during that time. What do you make of a girl (30 y.o) just popping up out the blue who isn't local?

Post: #2

Ask if she wants to go for drinks and/or dancing... then you'll know. (Even if she's not local it doesn't matter... If and when either of you are in the other's town.)

Post: #3

She is recently divorced and wants any sort of attention you will give her. She is moving to DC, one of the most favorable cities for single women.

Only continue talking to her if you are ok with being her emotional tampon.

Post: #4

Ask her to meet for drinks if possible.
If you do, go for the bang. Dont put you're into a situation to be the person she vents to.
@ 30 she's looking for orbiters to make her feel wanted.

If meeting up with her isn't possible in the short term. Wish her well and end communications with her.
If she gets pissy tell her you have a gf and don't want to be seen as cheating etc

Post: #5

Tell her you are unemployed or have a health problem...I bet you'll never hear from her again

Post: #6

Happens to me all the time.

Just sort of see how it unfolds.

Ask her out for drinks. If she is annoying about it, just sort of ignore her.

If she's easy about it, bang away.

Post: #7

Her opening conversation to you is a great thing, it means that at some time she thought about you.

Online, you won't increase her attraction to you. Stay a little boring, set up a time to meet.

Option 1: At night, take her out for drinks and do the night thing as others have suggested.

Option 2: in the day, i suggest you ask her come with you to run an errand, to go do some minor task with you, you can request her to come with you because you're busy but still want to see her, or so she can help you.

Then go bring your groceries, and her, back to your house.

"tomorrow after work I have to run to the store because I have get a few things but I'd still like to hang out. Want to come with?"

" I never know which avocados are the right ones to pick, want to come along and help me?"

If she has enough interest/trust in you: "want to hang out tomorrow?"(don't specify what to do if you don't have to, increases curiosity if can pull it off, don't deny this information but you can leave it out)

Then when you see her just go run your errands and flirt along the way. There won't be any difficulty in what to talk about and you'll both feel that you're working together.

Physically escalate but not to the degree you would at night, being especially mindful of the level of privacy you have. A "shy" girl is often just a girl who fears the judgement of others. Don't blow your act entirely or else she won't want to go into your apartment where she would very likely be a lot less "shy".

祝你好运

Post: #8

And please don't forget to tell us what happened

Post: #9

No mention of LinkedIn as a factor in this? Just Facebook?

Most of the time LinkedIn is used to angle for new job opportunities via who you know but I have to imagine it could also be used to create a short list of "WB" ex-coworkers who you kept away from due to not shitting where you eat.

I have to admit that out of all my ex-coworkers on LinkedIn (but not Facebook as that's too friend-friend) there are some girls who are there not because we worked closely but because they were in this category. It's like being a beta-orbiter without having to look or act like a beta-orbiter because LinkedIn is not nearly the attention-whoring platform that Facebook is.

By her contacting you first she has a weak/needy frame. I'd be interested in knowing how this one plays out.

Post: #10

Divorced. No kids (I assume). She's vulnerable.

She reached out to you (probably also to a few solid dudes she knew from the past), ultimately wants security (probably with kids, maybe without).

Two options:
- Pursue (fuck her)...Might just be a fwb for a bit before she moves on, might turn into something. Depends what you want. On average, women have 10% of their eggs left at age 30. She knows this.

- Talk to her more and not fuck her...I know, this was sort of meant to be funny. She'll chat with you like you're best friends, like you're counseling her through her divorce and big moves...then she'll meet a guy and never see you again.

Up to you. There's something that feels (to me) gross about just fucking around with a girl without kids who's ovaries are drying up. But then I've had those short relationships only to find the women happily married with child a mere 2 years later.

Post: #11

Thanks everyone for the replies

She is 30, no kids, married 4 yrs before the split
She isn't local (currently hour away soon to be 3) so unless I plan to be in DC, the thought of traveling for that sole reason is not high on my list.

That said, I do have a trip in late January, so I will set something up the night I fly in and see where it goes.

Post: #12

(12-14-2017 07:56 PM)treypound Wrote:  Thanks everyone for the replies

She is 30, no kids, married 4 yrs before the split
She isn't local (currently hour away soon to be 3) so unless I plan to be in DC, the thought of traveling for that sole reason is not high on my list.

That said, I do have a trip in late January, so I will set something up the night I fly in and see where it goes.

3o is old mate. Like, a car 30yrs old you push off a cliff. I am not advocating murder but, definitely not allocating time, a resource worthy more then money. I don't comprehend the way men pursue low hanging fruit and past prime women. Does not compute.

I saw a similar thing the other day at the gym. Young guy, early 20s following around 30 + single mom of two divorcee that is skiing down cawk mountain, bragging about it, and this cuck was following her around. Did not even lift a weight. I think it must be his really low testosterone level.

You sir are better then this.

Post: #13

(12-16-2017 12:23 PM)meetjoeblack Wrote:  

(12-14-2017 07:56 PM)treypound Wrote:  Thanks everyone for the replies

She is 30, no kids, married 4 yrs before the split
She isn't local (currently hour away soon to be 3) so unless I plan to be in DC, the thought of traveling for that sole reason is not high on my list.

That said, I do have a trip in late January, so I will set something up the night I fly in and see where it goes.

3o is old mate. Like, a car 30yrs old you push off a cliff. I am not advocating murder but, definitely not allocating time, a resource worthy more then money. I don't comprehend the way men pursue low hanging fruit and past prime women. Does not compute.

I saw a similar thing the other day at the gym. Young guy, early 20s following around 30 + single mom of two divorcee that is skiing down cawk mountain, bragging about it, and this cuck was following her around. Did not even lift a weight. I think it must be his really low testosterone level.

You sir are better then this.

Not sure how meetjoeblack got banned, but good post.