The Catalyst
Wingman
  
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Joined: Sep 2016
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Couldn't pull the trigger on SDL. What is a "Could I use your bathroom" for hotels
Approached this touristy looking girl who was walking slow, managed to get her to stop and come along with me. Would've taken her for drinks, but I had issues with my ID, so we went to a cafe instead. Had a pretty chill convo with some spikes. My style is a lot more rapport with attraction building sprinkled in, and I don't normally escalate hard. She was leaving tomorrow and was staying in a hotel provided for by her company. So I was thinking maybe I could have the chance of a SDL.
Tried to drop the seed that I wanted to check out her hotel and see how different it was to houses/apartments here, and after 30 mins or so in she said she wanted to head back and rest for her flight home, so I walked with her. When we arrived I asked her if I could come up and she said the hotel doesn't allow visitors. Thinking back, I'm not even sure if that's true, I just accepted it and let her be.
I'm definitely kicking myself for not pushing it as far as it could go, but I wasn't sure how I could've made it happen. I knew about Roosh's line to use the bathroom but couldn't see how it applied in this case(I could use any bathroom I wanted, not hers). But perhaps it wasn't meant to be regardless of what I did.
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| 01-10-2018 01:26 PM |
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The following 1 user Likes The Catalyst's post:1 user Likes The Catalyst's post
Built to Fade
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General Stalin
International Playboy
     
Posts: 5,033
Joined: Nov 2013
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RE: Couldn't pull the trigger on SDL. What is a "Could I use your bathroom" ...
(01-10-2018 01:26 PM)The Catalyst Wrote: Approached this touristy looking girl who was walking slow, managed to get her to stop and come along with me. Would've taken her for drinks, but I had issues with my ID, so we went to a cafe instead. Had a pretty chill convo with some spikes. My style is a lot more rapport with attraction building sprinkled in, and I don't normally escalate hard. She was leaving tomorrow and was staying in a hotel provided for by her company. So I was thinking maybe I could have the chance of a SDL.
Tried to drop the seed that I wanted to check out her hotel and see how different it was to houses/apartments here, and after 30 mins or so in she said she wanted to head back and rest for her flight home, so I walked with her. When we arrived I asked her if I could come up and she said the hotel doesn't allow visitors. Thinking back, I'm not even sure if that's true, I just accepted it and let her be.
I'm definitely kicking myself for not pushing it as far as it could go, but I wasn't sure how I could've made it happen. I knew about Roosh's line to use the bathroom but couldn't see how it applied in this case(I could use any bathroom I wanted, not hers). But perhaps it wasn't meant to be regardless of what I did.
She was lying. Sounds like you didn't build enough attraction with her and she was just using you for a good time - which is often what happens when you just "build rapport with attraction building sprinkled in, and don't normally escalate hard." Better luck next time.
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| 01-10-2018 03:59 PM |
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The following 1 user Likes General Stalin's post:1 user Likes General Stalin's post
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Northern Wastes
Game Denialist
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Joined: Mar 2017
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RE: Couldn't pull the trigger on SDL. What is a "Could I use your bathroom" ...
(01-10-2018 06:15 PM)The Catalyst Wrote: Thanks for the responses.
How can I deal with the fact that maybe my personality is a bit too "chill" to escalate? It feels sort of uncomfortable or pushy to. I guess it's something I just have to do anyway and get better with practise.
Also that's likely true she used me. I wonder how I can minimize that happening in the future.
I'm a very laid back kind of guy, certain girls will respond well to that kind of personality. Be easy going and fun, don't let yourself get worked up over stuff, smile and laugh a-lot. Usually stoner/hippie kind of girls will vibe with you. If you're a chill guy use that to your advantage. Just don't be afraid to show some intensity once in a while, throws them off and keeps things exciting.
Good advice above about the push pull. Teasing works especially well the more laid back you are, you can get away with more of it.
I don't think she used you, you two had a cute little date and she wasn't attracted enough to you to bring you home to her hotel and sleep with you on her last day.
Now if she had you pay her hotel bill and plane ticket...
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| 01-11-2018 02:45 PM |
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The following 3 users Like Northern Wastes's post:3 users Like Northern Wastes's post
Dulceácido, The Catalyst, Built to Fade
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Dulceácido
True Player
    
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RE: Couldn't pull the trigger on SDL. What is a "Could I use your bathroom" ...
(01-11-2018 02:45 PM)Northern Wastes Wrote: (01-10-2018 06:15 PM)The Catalyst Wrote: Thanks for the responses.
How can I deal with the fact that maybe my personality is a bit too "chill" to escalate? It feels sort of uncomfortable or pushy to. I guess it's something I just have to do anyway and get better with practise.
Also that's likely true she used me. I wonder how I can minimize that happening in the future.
I'm a very laid back kind of guy, certain girls will respond well to that kind of personality. Be easy going and fun, don't let yourself get worked up over stuff, smile and laugh a-lot. Usually stoner/hippie kind of girls will vibe with you. If you're a chill guy use that to your advantage. Just don't be afraid to show some intensity once in a while, throws them off and keeps things exciting.
Good advice above about the push pull. Teasing works especially well the more laid back you are, you can get away with more of it.
I don't think she used you, you two had a cute little date and she wasn't attracted enough to you to bring you home to her hotel and sleep with you on her last day.
Now if she had you pay her hotel bill and plane ticket...
Solidly agree with all the shit he said.
You were not "played." How were you played? You didn't get "used" for anything. What did you lose, a coffee???? Gimme a break.
So, here's the thing... There are about 70% odds stacked against you.
This is where you have to work.
50% of women will have a boyfriend (or girlfriend or be homosexual). 20% will have an active herpes infection or other STD that makes them sexually unavailable.
Your chances are better at Russian Roulette. So, you have to be on top of your game.
The reality here is, probably, she was sexually unavailable at the time... There could've been nothing you could do to get in her pants... That's just the way it goes sometimes...
I'm not a businessman; I'm a business, Man
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| 01-11-2018 02:59 PM |
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The following 2 users Like Dulceácido's post:2 users Like Dulceácido's post
The Catalyst, Built to Fade
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