Post: #1

Hi guys,
I know this girl through a social circle . She keeps giving me mixed signals . Anyway, I asked her out she said she is busy. I pushed her a little bit ( I know I should not have done this ). she said " okay next Tuesday but I need to check first on blah blah , but I will try to make it tho"

Honestly, I feel the flake is coming . What should I do ? I have 2 thoughts

1- Not contacting her and see if she will as the date day is getting closer

or

2- text her on Sunday to confirm the date and if she flaked then she had her shot and I can move on.

Post: #2

Sounds like a pretty cold lead to me friend. She may just be humoring you because she doesn't want to be known as a bitch by the very close social circle. Remember women value reputation to an extreme and it's likely in the forefront of her mind.

If you have nothing to lose (which I doubt because your circles are tied) i would keep running game on her until she either goes silent or becomes more enthusiastic. Try to build DHV via Instagram or text. This is going to be the more difficult route and if you're new to game it could end badly if you do it in a socially uncalibrated way.

Safe bet is option 1 both for your ego and reputation. If she's warm/hot she will hit you up. Also if she has feelings for you just going silent until then will drive her to be more attracted to you via hamsterizing why you haven't texted her, but it's a crap-shoot she could just as easily be banging some dude on the low not giving a shit. I would do this one because I see her pre-emptively paving the way for excuses as a waste of time and effort and more importantly is not respectful of your intentions and time.

Either way it sounds like a cold lead, as always game other girls.

Post: #3

Where I come from (America), "I have to check, I will try to make it" has always meant not really interested; I'd regard it as a pre-emptive flake already. A chick who wants to spend time with you will be excited about it and hurriedly agreeing to your request.

In light of her non-committal answer, I'm also tempted to regard "mixed signals" as no signals; while as a newbie you want to develop a confidence that most girls are interested in you and not talk yourself out of it, if you don't have a clear set of signals/moves/IOIs etc, you may have to conclude she's not actually into you. (Which is a blow to the ego but not a big deal - lots of gals on the tree.)

If it's between your two options, I'd go with #1 - best chance is to show the non-neediness and maybe she surprises you with a "are we still getting together Tuesday?" Meanwhile you have mentally banked the flake and spent some energy on other girls.

Post: #4

Update :
I followed the advice of both you guys . She didn’t initiate contact . So I will let go .

Thanks

Post: #5

For me since I am an aggressive guy I would always go for the follow up text to confirm at least at bare minimum. but since I just saw your last message about how she didnt initiate contact letting go is the best option.