Post: #1

By adult life I mean sometime after 22/23 as Uni life in many cases is a form of extended adolescence. If you joined the workforce or military before that age feel free to comment.

Answers like "when my son was born" or "the day I became a millionaire" don't count because those are once in a lifetime highs as opposed to periods of extended satisfaction with life.

The point of this thread is to figure out what common as well as uncommon themes contribute towards a happy life so please be specific with regards to what made that period of months or years the best. Hopefully, we can all learn from this.

I will start. The happiest period of my life was a stretch of about 8 months around age 26. I was working for my father learning how business works. I got to work at 7 and was back home by 3:30 or 4 most days. Afternoon nap followed by gym and dinner with family. I was lifting 6 days a week and eating fresh healthy food. I only had sex with one girl during that entire time. My ex-girlfriend who was not as hot as other women I've dated but she loved me and I was very fond of her. I was drinking very little and reading a lot of classic novels. I was especially inspired by Meditations by Marcus Aurelius and tried my best to live a life according to Stoic ideals. Once a week or so I met up with my old friends from high school and had a nice dinner together. Sunday mornings I went to church.

Currently, I'm working and studying 10- 14 hours a day, waking up at 5 am and taking cold showers, eating low carb, travelling quite a bit, making more money and dating around. Social circle has expanded. According to self-improvement Twitter I am on the right path but I feel less satisfied.

Maybe self-improvement Twitter is wrong. Maybe theres nothing wrong with a simple life.

Would like to hear your personal experiences and opinions.

Post: #2

If you were so happy working for your dad's business, why did you stop? Why can't you go back? You skipped over that part.

And you can take all the cold showers you want, but if you're not living the life you want, it won't make you happy. Also, the point of that self-improvement advice is to get you to be the most successful you can be. But it's only a supplement. If the foundation of your life is weak, then adding on all the self-improvement stuff will do nothing.

As for myself, I am the happiest right now. My career has taken a huge turn for the better. I'm going to be an expat abroad in Eastern Europe Moving abroad is something I've wanted since I began reading Roosh a decade ago, and now it is coming to fruition. My long-term goal is to be an expat, but to sustain myself on my own businesses, not a corporate salary, but I should be able to get this in a couple years.

Ideally, your life should compound to the point where you're always improving. Sometimes you can get off the path for a bit, which it seems like you did, but hopefully you have the right long-term vision and will get back on track.

Post: #3

I like this I idea for a thread, will give it a think and post back.

Post: #4

When I graduated from trade school, starting making good money and I realized that I wouldn’t have to worry about money any more, I was 25.

Post: #5

Right now. Mid 30s and improving every day.

Post: #6

For me there's always been a very hard disconnect between professional and personal life satisfaction. There's never been a time when both were in a perfect state.

The happiest time of my life professionally was when I was a web developer in the early 00s where I was learning rapidly and I felt integral to the company's success. There is a sweet spot when learning new things where each new day brings a new discovery. It makes you happy to trudge off to work each day. However, during that same period I went through a terrible divorce and custody battle. So work was sort of a refuge. After work I was in emotional turmoil.

On the flipside, the two periods in my life where I felt truly in love, my work life was not doing very well. I lost my virginity while I was working a crappy temp job at a bank and the second time I had taken a job continuing to code in a language that was now dying, and it was old code at that. After the way the second relationship ended it knocked me so far off-keel that I quit that job in the interest of really getting my affairs in order at mid-life. I tried to change careers but without a plan and wasted a big chunk of my life-savings in the process.

A big part of satisfaction in general comes from feeling a) important and b) in control of your destiny.

One need only see the movie Office Space for all the reasons why you might not have either of these.

The whole "what exactly do you DO here?" aspect. Where you feel like a 5th wheel, where the work feels insignificant in the grand scheme of things, where there's no room for advancement or mismanagement forces you to do tasks you know will turn out to be a cluster-F. I've seen it all and even in my current job there are aspects of this.

Another thing about work is it's far more essential to work than to have a love life. So there is an element of obligation. Jordan Peterson might say responsibility is good for you, but it also limits your ability to experiment. I thought I had enough money saved up to change careers, but doing that later in life with a child to support doesn't work because you have to replace a white collar salary with a white collar level salary. You can't spend years paying your dues from the ground up. So it's really important to get on the right career path early in life.

As you get older the biggest thing to deal with is to accept that there are some goals in life that are simply unattainable. You have to begin to learn to count your blessings and think more about passing things to the next generation so they hopefully won't make the same mistakes. More of a teaching/storytelling/mentoring mindset rather than ambition and acquisition.

Post: #7

I am the happiest I’ve ever been. Both business and personal/social lives are doing great.

Not long after uni, my dad got sick and I was working two jobs at the same time to pay off my student loans and help with my dad’s medical bills. I did ok after he passed and I got a new job, but then I got roped into a miserable marriage. Cut her loose, went to SEA and never looked back.

And here I am.

Post: #8

Right now and getting better. I'm in my mid 20s and shaking the rust off a bad start to post college. Getting down to brass tax and on my way to making some serious coin.

Post: #9

For me it is right now.

I've got a great setup out here in Singapore currently. Making great money, got a cracking city centre apartment and travelling almost every other weekend to party in the likes of Jakarta, Bali, Ho Chi Minh, Manila etc. Got a solid social circle in all of those places as well as here in SG, I'm having the most fun I've ever had and banging the hottest girls of my life just now.

I'll be approaching 40 soon so I know the party isn't going to continue forever, can already feel myself slowing down a bit. But I'm making the most of the good times now while they last

Post: #10

(09-23-2018 08:38 AM)CleanSlate Wrote:  I am the happiest I’ve ever been. Both business and personal/social lives are doing great.

Not long after uni, my dad got sick and I was working two jobs at the same time to pay off my student loans and help with my dad’s medical bills. I did ok after he passed and I got a new job, but then I got roped into a miserable marriage. Cut her loose, went to SEA and never looked back.

And here I am.

Thats a plus one from me

One great thing about this forum was me meeting cool guys all over the world who left shitty situations behind and ventured out in the world to pursue a life worth living.... I have much respect for men that take that plunge. Most of the guys I know back here in Murica in my hometown all settled for the first job they got (which they hate) settled down with the first girl that gave them the time of day (who they hate) and live miserable lives. They are to scared of the unknown to dare try to make any changes to their miserable existences.

I have no sympathy for those afraid of mystery

Post: #11

The best years of my life have been the decade since I turned 40.

- Fatherhood, raising smart kids
- Happy stay-at-home wife
- Money in the bank, own my place in one if the most beautiful cities in the world and a cottage in the countryside
- 9 to 5 job with comfortable pay, moderate challenge and absolutely no responsibility
- Unabating pussy fest on the side
- Lifting and dieting, best shape of my life
- Reading books, learning languages
I have achieved the life of a Victorian gentleman

Post: #12

(09-23-2018 01:01 PM)Montrose Wrote:  The best years of my life have been the decade since I turned 40.

- Fatherhood, raising smart kids
- Happy stay-at-home wife
- Money in the bank, own my place in one if the most beautiful cities in the world and a cottage in the countryside
- 9 to 5 job with comfortable pay, moderate challenge and absolutely no responsibility
- Unabating pussy fest on the side
- Lifting and dieting, best shape of my life
- Reading books, learning languages
I have achieved the life of a Victorian gentleman

How did you do it? Any practical tips for early 30s guys trying to commit to a career path? I don't want to have a family until about 40.

Post: #13

I got married and started a family in my early 30s. The first years of raising kids are tough. Babies crying at night, no more going out, diapers...

As for the money, I worked on financial markets for 15 years and had a couple of good (but very stressful) years. You need a college degree in business or math and a bit of luck at the beginning of your career.

I was not very happy in my thirties because of work stress and family constraints, but it gets better after midlife (35/40). Jung and other psychologists have shown that midlife is a transformational experience. Until midlife, you are fighting to find your place in society, and afterwards your perspective changes and you focus more on having an interesting life. Hence the documented U-curve of happiness (happiness increasing steadily after midlife).

Post: #14

From 2001-2007. I was desperately in love with a woman who loved me more than I loved her. She was feminine and looked up to me. Prior to 2007 everything pointed to life going nowhere but up. Life was a lot of suffering prior to 2001- 2001 began the longest extended period of sustained happiness in my life. I will always look fondly upon this time, It let me know life is beautiful and worth living. There will always be challenges in life, just try to make the best of your situation and you will be surprised how quickly things can turn while you are not paying attention.

Post: #15

It was few months 2 years ago. I was just before graduation. I knew, I will easily make it and I was selected for the unit I desired. I was at top shape of my life and popullation generally (when I don´t count professional athletes) and had great vibes. It was beginning of the summer and I got together with my ex-fiance. She was the girl of my dreams and everything was perfect. We were enjoying life togetger, as I never imagined before.

Funny fact is, that I throwed all this away intentiously and on my will.

Post: #16

If your not looking forward to tomorrow you're doing something wrong in my book.

Nothing in my past is going to limit the fun I plan to have in the future, sure I had good times but that laid the groundwork for how to have better ones in the future.

Post: #17

The summer of being 24 - making a lot of money, travelling the world and indulging in beautiful things. All downhill from there.

Post: #18

School days. Or as I once saw carved on a desk, "School daze".

Post: #19

Great thread idea. There were two periods in my life when I was really happy.

1) Age 19-20 -- I was in the best shape of my life (fresh off a year on the rowing team, was biking eighty miles a week, deadlifting almost four plates, was overall in great physical condition). I spent the summer dicking around, smoking weed, and chasing girls with three of my best friends at the time. Had some great experiences on mushrooms/LSD, spent tons of time outdoors, and worked a pretty meaningful job in an underprivileged area (which incidentally had great food and a lot of hot girls). I then transferred to a top school where I made a ton of friends and had my first consistent success daygaming. I hooked up with a new girl every week off of either daygame or Tinder, it was pretty awesome.

2) Age 24 (now) -- the period between age 20 and 24 was rough for me. I fucked up my body in various ways, did too many drugs, had family issues...the list goes on and on. Now I'd say I've finally made some good progress towards rehabilitating myself. I have my fitness on lock -- I do BJJ 3x a week and lift twice. I've gained seventeen pounds (went from 158 to 175 lbs). I'm not as strong or fit as I used to be, but this is still the most muscular I've looked in my life. I'm also working a high-paying job that intellectually challenges me and I'm dating a rich, attractive Chinese girl who I actually like quite a lot. The only thing I really want to fix is my social life. I have a lot of childhood friends in the area and I want to make an effort to see them more.

Post: #20

Early 30's. My career boomed incredibly (didn't last) and I lived in a part of the world with beautiful, feminine women.

Then, returned to US, married a feminist, career derailed by female whiners and male idiots.

Needless to say, many years later, I am much LESS happy.

LEARN FROM MY MISTAKES:

- Do not marry any woman who doesn't follow your lead (my current GF is much younger, very cute, and an obedient puppy...i guess that part of life is going well for me right now!)
- Avoid talking to women at work in anything but the gentlest dulcet tones. I once was talking to an insecure fatty who worked for me. She was overly-emotional; probably on the rag that week. I gave her some basic coaching on something she fucked up. She gave me sass, so i gave her the coaching a little more directly this time. Next thing you know, I'm fired for """abuse""". SPEAK TO WOMEN LIKE YOU WOULD SPEAK TO A 5 yr-old who can't color within the lines. "That's really, really good Bobby! REALLY good!". And then fix her work yourself or have someone else do it. DO NOT instruct her to fix it!
- If you're in a part of the world you like and are thriving in, reconsider why you need to "return to the mother ship". Just because you grew up in the states (or UK, or Australia, etc) doesn't mean you need to return there.
- Don't work for men demonstrably dumber than you are. Even if the job pays really well. Many will feel threatened and seek to get you fired. That costs a lot, in the long run.

Post: #21

Great thread idea.

From 2011 - 2014, I had a golden age from ages 26 - 30. And I believe that I'm about to usher in another one.

In 2011, I had substantial savings from a well-paying but miserable job, I quit, and I expatriated to South America for 3 years.

During this period, I worked minimal hours in easy jobs, I became proficient in Spanish, I learned to salsa dance, I kept a fit body, and I learned to cook well. I had some decent friends, was probably at my best looks-wise, and I felt magnetic toward sexy, exotic Colombian girls. The combination of leisure, novelty, living in a vibrant area, satisfying intimate relationships, and personal growth gave me a sense of momentum and every day I felt like I was truly living. Even at the time, I knew I was at a peak and was able to squeeze the juice out of life and savor what was happening.

The following 3 years from 30 - 33 were a valley. I moved back to the USA, and I wanted to get myself profesionally established so I was focused on work and my social life deteriorated. Last year at age 33, my Mom and grandma died in quick succession, and I got fired from my job at a SJW-oriented company without explanation.

I had replenished some of my savings and decided to move to Mexico City. My finances improved with a small windfall from the mom/grandma deaths and also after catching last year's crypto boom in ETH and BTC. A friend here in CDMX hired me to do a project, so I've been living here and doing that part-time for about a year. Social life has improved and I'm satisfied with limited hours. The contract is about to end, and I'm about to be a free man again.

So now at age 34, with max leisure time in a great city, some good tech skills, in mostly good shape, with a centrally located apt, a huge savings buffer, and more poise generally, I'm expecting an extended golden age to start soon as I move to lock down my place in this city.

Post: #22

I loved every minute of high school, hated college (due to a dramatic falling out among most of my high school friendships simultaneously), discovered game almost immediately after i graduated and had the time of my life ages 21-23

. Then financial instability, among a few other things, led me to deeply question myself ages 23-27, and i developed extreme anxiety issues, which for a time completely consumed me to an extent I thought I would never recover from.

At 27 I got into a LTR with a girl who was completely wrong for me, but somehow she gave me enough love to overcome some of my psychological issues I was having at the time. Towards the end of the LTR I also started to establish myself financially a bit. When the LTR ran it's course I went back into the field a completely new man. My 29th year was probably the best year of my life -- despite the fact that I had spent the previous 5 years thinking I would never get back to my glory days of my early 20s. Not only did I reclaim the glory of my younger days, it was actually MUCH better, and MUCH crazier than I would've ever thought possible at 21.

A few years have passed since that initial rush that came following the end of my mid-20s LTR, and to be honest the high is wearing off a little , but I still feel great about my life. More importantly my experience has taught me that you shouldn't ever think to yourself that you've "peaked." Life really can surprise you and turn around in ways you wouldn't have forseen.

Post: #23

Now!

32 years old. Expatriated to South America (Uruguay) at the end of last year. I live two blocks from the beach after I spent 7-ish months living in a hostel (also cool) four blocks from the beach. I get to watch the local socialists ineffectively derp about how they want to make the country poorer, and shit's pretty cool. There's enough professional challenges to keep things interested and not fall into a boredom hole.

Post: #24

When I was 18. Before my friends suicides and murders. Was in my peak in my health and looks. Had plenty of women (also had no disdain for the female gender at that time whatsoever) and generally got along with everyone. Oftentimes didn't have a care in the world.

I'm 26 now and I have happy moments, but I'm mostly a wage slave who has a lot of pent up anger about some past girl issues and my friends murder suicide. Relationship with my family has gone to shit as well. With that said, right around my last semester of college where I was getting into the workforce, I discovered the world of escorts and P4P and I usually bang one model a week. I love it and I'll probably end up doing my whole life as I'm not getting married. My whole week I work a hard 50+ hours so I can go bang a prostitute once or twice a week. I consider myself a loner, but I have many hobbies that keep me occupied. So I'd consider right now to be the best part of my life, but a lot of my happiness is undermined by my angst from the death of my friends amongst other things.

Post: #25

^My condolences about your friends, man. It does get better.