Post: #1

I've become pretty good friends with this girl I met recently, and tonight she threw me something that caught me completely off guard.

Here's the relevant sequence of events:
- I told her recently that I've put in a conscious effort to stop smoking weed
- Tonight we ran into each other at a mutual friends, where she saw me smoking weed
- As we were leaving with another friend, she began questioning me on my seeming change of heart, and kept inquiring as to why I was still smoking if I said I'd stop
- The other friend asks her why shes so nosy.

Here's what caught me off guard.
She replies:

Quote:"Honestly, luckyfever perplexes me. I don't think I get him at all. But then again, (as she turns towards me) I think I do know you. You're just a hopeless romantic. You're not that successful with girls, and yet you act like you're such a- "

...with a purposeful halt before finishing the sentence. And the entire time she was looking me in the eye with what I deemed an inquiring/observant, almost hostile eye.

This has gotten to me, as I can't help but feel there's truth to what she said. I'm still working on my game and have been making strides, yet I'm nowhere near satisfied with my results so far. She is aware of some of my recent successes and failures.

And so I'm not quite sure what to think of what she said. It felt like a jab. Was she insulting me? Negging? Trying to help me in some way?

Another reason I can think of is that many months ago I called her a spoiled millennial brat and it got to her a bit. Maybe this is her getting me back?

Post: #2

I would just look at her with a broad smile then start laughing.

Post: #3

She's shit testing you.

P.s. less weed = less paranoid and more mental sharpness.

Post: #4

She's trying to get a rise out of you.

Post: #5

Why are you friends with a girl?

Post: #6

(10-11-2018 01:11 AM)Mackandal Wrote:  I would just look at her with a broad smile then start laughing.

more like a Cheshire cat grin or smirk, but yeah that is the proper response.

She is drawn to you and she can't figure out why.

Post: #7

Do you want to fuck her?
Whatever you are planning to do don't ever let something a women is saying to you affect you

Post: #8

You said you were going to stop smoking, then she saw you smoking.

I credit a woman who calls you out for your BS.

She wasn't being nosy...you told her about your life, and she was responding to your actions. The fact that she's talking to you and or about you means you're on her radar, that's all.

Post: #9

That's a pure shit test, she's looking for you to basically confirm your value after making a mistake. Basically you fell off her pedestal that she'd put you on and she's giving you a ladder if you want it to try and get back up.

Basically the weed smoking is one of her no go zones for a potential partner and you've obviously ticked some other boxes but you're failing that one hard and she wants to know why, are you a loser addict with no self control or just someone who slipped up.

Post: #10

Haha It reminds me some female coworker that has a husband and a son.

I'm sure she likes me, because she is always shit-testing me till I get jaded and end yelling her some things like: So you want I have kids at your age of 22? Don't fukn joke me. Or So you want I think you are that good girl? LOL I know you sassy girl!
Even she says me: If I went to a club and a guy like you talks to me, I wouldn't respond to you. Me: Haha Firstly I even wouldn't talk to you! I'd see other hotter girls

I know is a shit test because at the end of the day when she goes to her Uni, she always offer to me going in her taxi to get shorter my way to my home, or she buys some drinks or sandwiches for me when she goes to the store, when I haven't asked for it.

So OP, I'd say this girl is craving to you to take action and get wilder right now.

About weed or another 'bad-dangerous thing' you are leaving (other drugs, alcohol, hard parting, dealing drugs, etc... -no applies for weak things), I used to do the same thing. It worked for me saying a girl I'm changing and then don't giving a fuck about what I've said. IMO, it disconcerts them as long as it is a 'alpha' behavior. Finally one can leave it for good but making clear that's why because of you and that u don't care about what she says.

Post: #11

Who cares? You need to relax, you care too much. You're having paranoid neurotic thoughts like an insane woman.

Now you're probably going to worry about what I just said.

Post: #12

Can you elaborate more on this ladder theory?

I was once on a date back in my beta days and the girl just said “you’re the strong silent type, right?” And I said no because I didn’t want to lie to gain her approval. Was that the right move?

Post: #13

Bro, You can be "friends" with women but you should never talk about your struggles with her, Basically you faltered your frame and she shit tested you to see if she could destroy your frame.

Post: #14

Sounds like she's a good read of character. As you said, you feel there is truth in what she said. You two are platonic with one another so it's not exactly a "neg" or a "shittest" but sounds more like she's just calling you out on not following through with your convictions. You say you're stopping smoking weed, but here you are smoking weed. Also from her statements it sounds like you fancy yourself as a ladykiller of sorts but in reality you've still got the training wheels on when it comes to women.

You let her get to know you personally like any other friend, and she's just calling out your inconsistencies. Maybe she's giving you some tough love. Take it as a mental note and work on your character.

Post: #15

From where I'm sitting it sounds like a shit test, as others have noted.

Generally speaking in my experience if a girl says things along the lines of "I just don't get you" it indicates some level of interest, regardless of context.

Post: #16

(10-11-2018 06:27 AM)Hypno Wrote:  She is drawn to you and she can't figure out why.

To everyone saying it's a shit test...
There's definitely a mutual attraction with this girl, but I've kept it platonic as she's been with an acquaintance for 5+ years now.
We've both maintained boundaries. We should be platonic friends. She's shit tested me before, but we fell into a stable friendship. So I don't understand why she'd start shit testing again. And especially in this way.

(10-11-2018 01:50 AM)JackinMelbourne Wrote:  P.s. less weed = less paranoid and more mental sharpness.

(10-11-2018 01:23 PM)RedPillUK Wrote:  Who cares? You need to relax, you care too much. You're having paranoid neurotic thoughts like an insane woman.

Now you're probably going to worry about what I just said.

You guys are right. It's one of the reasons I'm cutting down on weed. Don't know what happened but it now makes me socially anxious and paranoid. Social settings are now never enjoyable while high -- it's become a pattern now, and last night was a stark reminder. Now that I'm sober today, I'm not sure I should even trust my interpretation of last night's interaction. But the way it jarred me still remains.

(10-11-2018 03:58 AM)sethg Wrote:  Why are you friends with a girl?

Because some of them are good people and worth having in your life. They can provide value in different ways than men.

(10-11-2018 07:47 AM)heavy Wrote:  You said you were going to stop smoking, then she saw you smoking.

I credit a woman who calls you out for your BS.

She wasn't being nosy...you told her about your life, and she was responding to your actions. The fact that she's talking to you and or about you means you're on her radar, that's all.

(10-11-2018 03:05 PM)General Stalin Wrote:  Sounds like she's a good read of character. As you said, you feel there is truth in what she said. You two are platonic with one another so it's not exactly a "neg" or a "shittest" but sounds more like she's just calling you out on not following through with your convictions. You say you're stopping smoking weed, but here you are smoking weed. Also from her statements it sounds like you fancy yourself as a ladykiller of sorts but in reality you've still got the training wheels on when it comes to women.

You let her get to know you personally like any other friend, and she's just calling out your inconsistencies. Maybe she's giving you some tough love. Take it as a mental note and work on your character.

I think you guys are most accurate. I'm going to take what she said as constructive tough love (as there really is no romantic/sexual future between us). That there are deficiencies in character I should work on, and that I shouldn't delude myself into thinking I'm a ladykiller. Or at least not until I start getting real results.

My actions this past year have reflected the game advice and philosophies on this forum and is generally red pill. I'm now concerned that I've been acting like a player, with more talk than walk, and that it's obvious to those around me. Her comment has been a good slap across the face. It's grounding and humbling. It also shows the kind of value some female friends can bring.

Post: #17

(10-11-2018 04:11 PM)luckyfever Wrote:  I'm now concerned that I've been acting like a player, with more talk than walk, and that it's obvious to those around me.

That's a legitimate concern. Running your mouth too much around "un-initiated" men can be an issue. I noticed this myself at one stage and it's detrimental within social circles, especially around husband types and people who don't get laid or envy your success. It becomes ammo to knock you off your pedestal, especially in a SJW climate.

Got to watch yourself around close friends too, they can stuff you up un-intentionally.

Post: #18

(10-11-2018 01:05 AM)luckyfever Wrote:  I've become pretty good friends with this girl I met recently,

Yep, that's a huge neg right there. Women only befriend men they secretly disrespect.