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Was I downgraded from her #1?
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Tod6264 Offline
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Post: #26
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
She just sent me a text like 10 minutes ago saying

“Wheww today at work was nuts. So glad to be back home with the pups (halo emoji)”


How should I respond? Could I push for hanging out tonight or just see her on Wednesday on our planned date?

Or don’t respond, or until tomorrow.
(This post was last modified: 04-22-2018 09:48 PM by Tod6264.)
04-22-2018 09:47 PM
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RedPillUK Offline
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Post: #27
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
Definitely don't push for hanging out tonight. That's the neediest and therefore worst option.

You could ignore it, its an utterly boring and pointless text. However it might be a little too out of character for you now.

I think you should reply an hour or two later, saying, "aw, have a nice night" and that's it.

If you text back straight away or too quickly, then she might text back and then you get dragged into a text conversation. You want to avoid too much of that.

"Especially Roosh offers really good perspectives. But like MW said, at the end of the day, is he one of us?"

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04-22-2018 10:00 PM
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Mufasa Offline
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Post: #28
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
something is off here...
only girls have 102 unread text messages...

Attraction and passion are non-negotiable
04-22-2018 10:20 PM
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Steelex Offline
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Post: #29
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
Look my friend I'm going to give you the straight up.

It doesn't matter if you're her number 1 or number 12, if she does this or that, blah blah blah. It's all irrelevant. You're new, you don't have a feel for the game yet. Game is a feel thing.

Go fuck another 50 women and you won't have any more questions. You'll understand pretty much everything intuitively.

You've fucked her a few times, move on. She's not the only decent looking girl with a vagina. She's a practice bitch.
04-22-2018 10:43 PM
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Frank Rook Offline
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Post: #30
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
OP,
1) School yourself with Patrice O' Neal's material regarding women and relationships on YouTube.
2) Threesome = ffm, train = mmf (shouldn't be anywhere on the radar of a man's options)
3) School yourself with West Indian Archie's classic posts on this very forum. He was giving away gold.
4) Take RedPill and Steelex's advice above for more immediate actionable solutions.
04-22-2018 11:10 PM
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JackinMelbourne Offline
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Post: #31
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
(04-22-2018 09:47 PM)Tod6264 Wrote:  She just sent me a text like 10 minutes ago saying

“Wheww today at work was nuts. So glad to be back home with the pups (halo emoji)”

"Why don't you come over and tell me all about it..."

Pre-planned future dates don't exist. Chicks flake and plans change, 3 days is a long time. It's a lot easier to talk shit and get her relaxed if she just comes over without any bullshit date ritual which might get her stressing about what to wear etc. Let her come round, get comfortable and complain about shit at work while you give her a shoulder rub, which turns into a (firm) neck rub and accidental hair tug and gets her juicy. Then take it as it cums and improvise in the moment based on her reactions and the sexual tension.

If she replies about not wanting to come over, just ignore her text till Tuesday night/Wednesday/original date day.

Either way, improvise and don't get stuck in a pointless sms conversation.
04-23-2018 03:25 AM
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jcardial Offline
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Post: #32
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
(04-22-2018 08:55 PM)Tod6264 Wrote:  I’ve never had a friendship or any type of relationship with a girl. And all my friends are terrible with girls too. So what would you expect?

I’m just trying to improve myself.

But what kind of relationship is this? Fuck buddies, friends with benefits if she’s not a girlfriend or friend that’s a girl?

You have to get experience with whatever quality of women are willing to bang you and learn from it. The problem is you are being told exactly how to learn from this and how to proceed in general, but you're not listening at all and starting a new thread when the solution is being presented on a silver platter for you. You're going to self sabotage if you ignore everyone anyway and follow your noob instincts.

People are unanimously telling you to be less needy, available, and desperate but when she texts you a couple days before your date that she's stressed, you're asking if you should invite yourself over with wine and flowers or whatever. Do you not see how being her emotional lackey lap dog on moments notice is the complete opposite of what you're being told to do.

Get some hobbies and ideally some social ones. It is telling that your only source is online dating. No matter how bad your social skills are naturally, you will be much less bad if you get regular experience. Everyone gets rusty if they are living like a recluse.
04-23-2018 06:26 AM
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Tod6264 Offline
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Post: #33
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
So about 30-40 minutes after she sent me that text I sent her what you said and she didn’t respond as expected.

Thing is I was at her house and slept over last Sunday so maybe she wanted to do the same thing again and that’s why she texted me. But idk

So basically going from texting everyday to not initiating anything.

On the day of the date or tomorrow should I text her anything?

Maybe like “hey I’m looking forward to seeing you/going to museum. Make sure you wear something sexy”


Or just say “hey I’ll see you @3”?
04-23-2018 12:51 PM
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Salvadore Offline
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Post: #34
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
You've already banged this girl a few times so you're overthinking this a bit but I would say this...

I wouldn't recommend you to pull that line "make sure you wear something sexy", I don't think it would come off as congruent with you now. You've been the nice guy beta sending her sweet texts and now you're suddenly gonna pull some badboy line like that? And it would be more convenient to write something like that if you were going to meet during night and not at 3 pm.

I'd say wait with that, you're not there yet.

I'd write her "you on the phone now?", and then when she texts you back, you immediately call her up. Do some quick small talk and ask her about her day for like a minute or two and then you say "yeah..uhm... and I thought about the museum later..." and then you set up the date with her over the phone instead.
(This post was last modified: 04-23-2018 01:39 PM by Salvadore.)
04-23-2018 01:39 PM
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Tod6264 Offline
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Post: #35
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
The date is already set up for Wed. At 3. We agreed on that on Saturday.

Just wondering what to text predate.

Or just say I’m on my way?

I’m meeting at her apartment
04-23-2018 01:44 PM
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Salvadore Offline
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Post: #36
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
(04-23-2018 01:44 PM)Tod6264 Wrote:  The date is already set up for Wed. At 3. We agreed on that on Saturday.

Just wondering what to text predate.

Or just say I’m on my way?

I’m meeting at her apartment

Ok. Yes, something like that. But just make it short and not a paragraph.
04-23-2018 01:51 PM
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arafat scarf Offline
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Post: #37
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
(04-23-2018 01:44 PM)Tod6264 Wrote:  The date is already set up for Wed. At 3. We agreed on that on Saturday.

Just wondering what to text predate.

Or just say I’m on my way?

I’m meeting at her apartment

I'm going to echo the sentiment of some of the other posters here.

The fact that you're asking us what to do for each step in dealing with this girl indicates a certain kind of rot in your thinking, attitudes, and beliefs. Based on your messages, you're emanating a longing, thirsty demeanor but fortunate for you, the girl is tolerating it for now and is willing to oil your salami.

Maybe you should think more simple:

How will I enjoy myself with this girl if I end up seeing her again? And if I don't end up seeing her again, how can I make sure that I don't slip into anguish or despair after letting her slip through my fingers?

And maybe for the big picture:

How can I structure my life and modify my behavior + vibe + appearance so that a lover is wondering if she's my number 1.
04-23-2018 02:46 PM
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Tod6264 Offline
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Post: #38
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
Okay now she just sent me “Thinking of you!”

Could I push for bringing wine over tonight or is that still needy if we’re dating on Wednesday?

I’d say “hold that thought and I’ll bring a bottle”

Or if I shouldn’t meet up “I know”
04-23-2018 05:13 PM
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LeBaron Offline
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Post: #39
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
Man are you actually listening to the multiple advices given to you or do you just want us to answer to your text messages?

If it's the later, being from the states you can probably afford to hire an Indian VA to answer to every single text messages that you receive from this girl.
(This post was last modified: 04-23-2018 05:54 PM by LeBaron.)
04-23-2018 05:53 PM
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jcardial Offline
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Post: #40
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
(04-23-2018 05:13 PM)Tod6264 Wrote:  Okay now she just sent me “Thinking of you!”

Could I push for bringing wine over tonight or is that still needy if we’re dating on Wednesday?

I’d say “hold that thought and I’ll bring a bottle”

Or if I shouldn’t meet up “I know”

This girl sounds like a pretty big tool also so I'm not that surprised she's over looking your game blunders. Don't invite yourself over. You're like the lap dog anxiously awaiting his chance to jump up. Why even ask for our advice though if you're just going to look for any excuse to ignore it.
04-23-2018 06:54 PM
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questor70 Offline
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Post: #41
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
(04-22-2018 08:55 PM)Tod6264 Wrote:  But what kind of relationship is this? Fuck buddies, friends with benefits if she’s not a girlfriend or friend that’s a girl?

If you're not in love with her then I think you should classify it as FwB (if you share common interests) or F-buddy (if you don't). I wouldn't tell her that, but you'd want to moderate your behavior and emotional investment accordingly.
(This post was last modified: 04-23-2018 07:41 PM by questor70.)
04-23-2018 07:41 PM
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JackinMelbourne Offline
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Post: #42
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
I'll re-quote and re-phrase myself:

Quote:If she replies about not wanting to come over (or ignores your text or changes the subject), just ignore her texts/calls till date day, or the night before.

IGNORE UNTIL DATE REMINDER AND/OR LOGISTICS ARRANGEMENT. SO THAT'S THE NIGHT BEFORE, OR ON THE DATE DAY.

We don't want to hear anything from you on this board until after the date. Nothing. shhhh.
04-23-2018 08:36 PM
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RedPillUK Offline
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Post: #43
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
Wow you two are still texting each other? I have only spoke to my girl of four months once since I last saw her Friday. The good news is this girl is almost as needy as you. If you had any game this would be a very easy lay.

Dude, I'll make it easier for you. Tell her you have a new phone. Then give me her number in a private message. I'll do all the texting with her from now on. I'll also do all the banging. I will make sure to film as much of the action as possible and then send it over to you for your enjoyment.

"Especially Roosh offers really good perspectives. But like MW said, at the end of the day, is he one of us?"

- Reciproke, posted on the Roosh V Forum.
(This post was last modified: 04-24-2018 07:55 PM by RedPillUK.)
04-24-2018 07:55 PM
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Tod6264 Offline
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Post: #44
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
I’ve already banged her 5-6 times and we bang every time I see her.

I’m just saying it’d be inconsistent for me to change the way I’ve been texting her. From a “beta needy dude” to not texting. But I’ve been texting her things that wouldn’t need a response to cut the convo off. Yesterday no texts were sent though.

Today’s our next date so I’m just gonna text her

Hey I’ll be over at x:xx
04-25-2018 08:31 AM
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Post: #45
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
Do you really spell your name Tod with only one 'd'?


In regards to gaming, here's my philosophy (not as common around here)...you can do what you're "supposeda do", but in the end, you're going to do whatever you feel you need to do. I look at Game with less experienced guys (me when I was your age) like I look at a child learning about his limits. Just go fuck shit up. Send the text you know you shouldn't. Type out the paragraph if you really feel you need to. Post on here about her. You'll probably get burned, but if that's what needs to happen, let it happen. At least you'll learn quicker.

Do you think she's been posting on her BFF group text about this nerdy but hot guy who drives her crazy because he doesn't pay enough attention to her?

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”
04-25-2018 08:43 AM
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Post: #46
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
Do whatever you want to do, while knowing you might not get what you want. If you're alright with that you'll be alright in this world

A man who procrastinates in his choosing will inevitably have his choice made for him by circumstance.

A true friend is the most precious of all possessions and the one we take the least thought about acquiring.
04-25-2018 10:04 AM
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Tod6264 Offline
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Post: #47
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
Just texted her I was on my way to her place for the date and she said she has to reschedule. Should I let her pick a date or should I?



She said “I’m so sorry I have to reschedule! Details soon, on my way to that interview”

Should I just say “good luck! lemme know”

By “details soon” did she mean she’ll text back about the reschedule?

Or should I try planning the reschedule?

And send something like

“Good luck! I have a bottle of some fine Pinot Grigio if you wanna drink some with me tonight”
04-25-2018 10:33 AM
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Post: #48
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
^No need to respond.

If you don't hear back after a couple days, you can hit her up. If she gives a positive response, then plan something.

Reporter: What keeps you awake at night?
General James "Mad Dog" Mattis: Nothing, I keep other people awake at night.

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04-25-2018 10:37 AM
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Tod6264 Offline
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Post: #49
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
Shit well I already sent

No worries, if you wanna do something later tonight I’ve gotta bottle of Pinot Grigio. But good luck with the interview!


Thing is like 3/6 times we’ve hung out it’s just been me bringing wine over to her place at night
04-25-2018 10:39 AM
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torridon747 Offline
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Post: #50
RE: Was I downgraded from her #1?
Open invitations are almost always a bad idea. You lose frame, it shows you have nothing better to do than wait for her to show up which lowers your status, and worst of all it sets a precedent via those two mechanisms that makes you lose leverage.

Open invitations should almost never be used as a hail mary. They should be used when you're doing some dope shit that's already giving them FOMO and you give exactly zero fucks if she shows up. I actually still do this often and it fucks me every time.

Bad - "I'm making dinner drinking wine feel free to show up after [thing she said she waa doing instead]"

Lame, you're waiting on her to come make your night cuz you got nothing better to do. I wouldn't go out of my way unless I had no plans (girls generally have 3-10 different options for social events a day. Half the time staying at home is more attractive cuz they all look like that quote above).

Passable "Yo I'm at X club and its raging, everyone is popping bottles acting crazy and having a lot of fun you should roll through bring some friends"

You are making the night and if it's true who cares if some random hoe shows up. Gives her FOMO. Open invitation is implied instead of verbose. This is likely to make a girl ditch her plans because of you.
(This post was last modified: 04-25-2018 11:36 AM by torridon747.)
04-25-2018 11:32 AM
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