Post: #26

Interesting basilransom, thanks for the link. Marriage is a pretty extreme length to go to, but sounds like a lot can be learnt from. Shall definitely check it out, certainly sounds a lot healthier and more genuine than 'let me put on my leather Dom pants, grab my paddle and be a man for you - if you want'.

Post: #27

Most women like slight bondage in my opinion(pulling hair,mild choking,ass fisting,ass spanking etc).Some asked me to do that.As for heavy bondage I had only one polish girl who was into it but I could not comply with her demands she wanted rather extreme stuff.So she travelled to Germany to meet a German dungeon living in Berlin.He did not fuck her just beat her sensesely till blood came out of her nose and she was full of bruises.Sometimes she would enter hospital after that.
Then one day I visited her in Poland and did some heavy bondage to her(she had no limits).After some weeks she sent me SMS the German had come also in Poland and had done the same as me 10 times harder so she had to be admitted to hospital with serious complications.Generally with her I had done some of the most extreme stuff depicted in bondage movies so you can imagine what the German did to her.However I as Mediteranean am soft and cannot reach the hardness and sadism a Germanic can display we are always one step behind in this regard.

Post: #28

Is it true that a lot of European girls are into hardcore bondage?

Post: #29

(03-19-2012 03:50 PM)Greek kamaki Wrote:  Most women like slight bondage in my opinion(pulling hair,mild choking,ass fisting,ass spanking etc).Some asked me to do that.As for heavy bondage I had only one polish girl who was into it but I could not comply with her demands she wanted rather extreme stuff.So she travelled to Germany to meet a German dungeon living in Berlin.He did not fuck her just beat her sensesely till blood came out of her nose and she was full of bruises.Sometimes she would enter hospital after that.
Then one day I visited her in Poland and did some heavy bondage to her(she had no limits).After some weeks she sent me SMS the German had come also in Poland and had done the same as me 10 times harder so she had to be admitted to hospital with serious complications.Generally with her I had done some of the most extreme stuff depicted in bondage movies so you can imagine what the German did to her.However I as Mediteranean am soft and cannot reach the hardness and sadism a Germanic can display we are always one step behind in this regard.

Hahahaha, you sir are a true gem. I like how you slipped ass fisting right in with hair pulling and spanking. And the remarks on Germans...

This Greek guy I know is always talking about 'opp all-pee-soh.'

Post: #30

Some women are very strange.One English woman was explaining to me how whiping does good to her skin.I touched her thighs and buttocks and they were very hard from the constant whiping.

Post: #31

(03-19-2012 05:26 AM)basil Wrote:  The crazy thing is in most of these dom and sub relationship its actually the female submissive who is ultimately in control. There is the illusion and both may not even be aware of it, but the girl is dictating terms.

Both people are in control, as typically the limits are discussed before the things start. And everyone can stop any moment. For example, as a dom you might be willing to try some crazy shit like needles/syringes play but find out it doesn't turn you on at all - even though your sub likes it.

Quote:If she says I dont like being spanked the guy wont. Whereas a true dom guy, if he enjoys spanking, will say 'sorry sweetie im in charge, this is for my enjoyment not yours - so learn to like it *whack*'.

This is not correct. The scene is for everyone's enjoyment, not just for the dom's enjoyment. The way you describe it this "true dom" has a good chance to end up in a prison. This is why this doesn't happen.

Quote:The ornate and time consuming bondage with rope work is ridiculous. Get some handcuffs, use your belt or buy some cheap ties (you can use it like a collar and leash on her, tie wrists together and to the bed, use two to tie her legs apart, blindfold, etc.)

If you're new to all that stuff and want to try it, I'd suggest to check some club. Or at least read some FAQs. You'll save yourself a lot of grief and maybe a visit to ER.

Quote:Why tie her legs apart when you can just tell her to 'spread your legs and keep them there until I say otherwise, move and you will be spanked'.

Because for some (most?) subs it is more enjoyable when they cannot move even if they want to. This is about the loss of control and trust.

Post: #32

(03-19-2012 08:10 PM)oldnemesis Wrote:  

Quote:Why tie her legs apart when you can just tell her to 'spread your legs and keep them there until I say otherwise, move and you will be spanked'.

Because for some (most?) subs it is more enjoyable when they cannot move even if they want to. This is about the loss of control and trust.

I agree it's about a loss of control in the hands of a man she trusts. And also fear - unlike men, fear can be a component of a woman's arousal.

But I'd contend that you can create these feelings without any equipment. And if you can, that will be far more effective in making you a man attractive to women. Specifically, I mean having the force of character to emote anger, to command firmly, to instill fear. To show flashes of absolute savagery. To make her so scared to move that she won't, even though she's not held down by a leather harness or whatever. As the poster Athlone here is fond of saying, you have to devolve to relate to women on a deep, carnal level.

Yes, BDSM equipment can heighten the effect, and some of the BDSM devotees don't need it to instill a feeling of fear and loss of control. But many do, and rely on it as a crutch, and think that the equipment is the source of their power and appeal, when it is really just sheer force of character.

Post: #33

(03-22-2012 01:01 PM)basilransom Wrote:  I agree it's about a loss of control in the hands of a man she trusts. And also fear - unlike men, fear can be a component of a woman's arousal.

Fear has been a major component of arousal for both sexes, not just for women. Sex in public places, with its risks of getting caught or even arrested, is often triggered by the fear arousal.

Quote:But I'd contend that you can create these feelings without any equipment. And if you can, that will be far more effective in making you a man attractive to women.

Yes, you can. But you can do more with the equipment. And for some people the pretense of equipment alone contributes significantly to their enjoyment.

Quote:Yes, BDSM equipment can heighten the effect, and some of the BDSM devotees don't need it to instill a feeling of fear and loss of control. But many do, and rely on it as a crutch, and think that the equipment is the source of their power and appeal, when it is really just sheer force of character.

This is true but it only works for the established couples. Otherwise it is very hard to calibrate the emotions properly as you're walking a fine line here.

Post: #34

I brought the book up in conversation with a couple girls at school today, both of whom are very feminist. One of them had heard of it before. I explained what the book was and they were like "OMG imma go download it tonight", then I stressed repeatedly how "degrading to women" and so forth people have called it to see how they would react (I don't actually believe that for the record). They didn't care one bit despite how feminist they claim to be. I'm not surprised.

Post: #35

(03-26-2012 06:10 AM)P Dog Wrote:  I brought the book up in conversation with a couple girls at school today, both of whom are very feminist. One of them had heard of it before. I explained what the book was and they were like "OMG imma go download it tonight", then I stressed repeatedly how "degrading to women" and so forth people have called it to see how they would react (I don't actually believe that for the record). They didn't care one bit despite how feminist they claim to be. I'm not surprised.

P Dog,

What do you think this means? Do feminists like rough sex? Can you be a feminist but still like it rough?

Post: #36

(03-26-2012 06:10 AM)P Dog Wrote:  I brought the book up in conversation with a couple girls at school today, both of whom are very feminist. One of them had heard of it before. I explained what the book was and they were like "OMG imma go download it tonight", then I stressed repeatedly how "degrading to women" and so forth people have called it to see how they would react (I don't actually believe that for the record). They didn't care one bit despite how feminist they claim to be. I'm not surprised.

I had brought it up to a female coworker. At first she was like, "what, that sounds weird." But when I told her that it had become extremely popular, she suddenly changed to "Now I have to check this out!" As the collective experience of guys here with rough sex suggests, many girls are only opposed to it when they think it's socially unacceptable.

Plus, there's plenty of things that a girl will say yes to only 'in the heat of the moment,' and at no other time. So if someone gives her a survey asking what she likes, her answers are going to be a lot more tame than if she were with a high value guy in bed who knew what he was doing. Not to mention the shame in coming off as promiscuous/freaky. Trashy romance novels bring down those barriers - no one needs to know she has them, and she's in an aroused state when she reads them, raising her appetite for freaky shit.

Giovonny, often actually. Almost every girl wants a man more dominant than her. A feminist tends to be more stubborn, and requires a higher dominance man to put her in her place. If she enjoys sex, she probably wants it rough, moreso than other girls.

Post: #37

(03-26-2012 10:48 AM)Giovonny Wrote:  

(03-26-2012 06:10 AM)P Dog Wrote:  I brought the book up in conversation with a couple girls at school today, both of whom are very feminist. One of them had heard of it before. I explained what the book was and they were like "OMG imma go download it tonight", then I stressed repeatedly how "degrading to women" and so forth people have called it to see how they would react (I don't actually believe that for the record). They didn't care one bit despite how feminist they claim to be. I'm not surprised.

P Dog,

What do you think this means? Do feminists like rough sex? Can you be a feminist but still like it rough?

Yes to both but conventional feminist wisdom dictates that going as rough and that far into damage like 50 Shades of Grey has (it's pretty hardcore stuff) goes into "violence against and degrading women" territory that feminists like to spout to attack porn. Which is what one of the girls has said to me before regarding porn.

Post: #38

(03-27-2012 04:15 AM)P Dog Wrote:  Yes to both but conventional feminist wisdom dictates that going as rough and that far into damage like 50 Shades of Grey has goes into "violence against and degrading women" territory that feminists like to spout to attack porn.

So, a young college girl claimed to be "feminist", but she was also curious about the book..

How old are these girls? 18? 19? 20?

Do you really think they know anything about "traditional feminist wisdom"?

And, if its "traditional", then its probably out-dated thinking. Let these girls explore new versions of "feminism". Versions that allow for rough sex! Let them talk their feminist shit but still try and bang them (rough). You might be doing her a favor by allowing her to understand the male-female dynamic more clearly!

It sounds like they are just kids exploring, experimenting, and searching for their adult identity and values.

Just because a 18 year old girl claims to be a feminist doesn't mean that she actually knows anything about "feminism". She is probably lucky if she can even work the microwave in her dorm room.

I don't think we can draw any conclusions from this.

All we know is that a college girl claimed to a "feminist" and was also curious about a bondage book.

If she is anything like the young college girls I know, she confuses and contradicts herself about every 5 minutes.

I wouldn't form any strong beliefs based on the comments and behavior of some 18 year old chick. She will probably change her mind the next day. Just focus on banging them. Their political and social beliefs are rarely worth considering.

Post: #39

(03-27-2012 12:29 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  

(03-27-2012 04:15 AM)P Dog Wrote:  Yes to both but conventional feminist wisdom dictates that going as rough and that far into damage like 50 Shades of Grey has goes into "violence against and degrading women" territory that feminists like to spout to attack porn.

So, a young college girl claimed to be "feminist", but she was also curious about the book..

How old are these girls? 18? 19? 20?

Do you really think they know anything about "traditional feminist wisdom"?

And, if its "traditional", then its probably out-dated thinking. Let these girls explore new versions of "feminism". Versions that allow for rough sex! Let them talk their feminist shit but still try and bang them (rough). You might be doing her a favor by allowing her to understand the male-female dynamic more clearly!

It sounds like they are just kids exploring, experimenting, and searching for their adult identity and values.

Just because a 18 year old girl claims to be a feminist doesn't mean that she actually knows anything about "feminism". She is probably lucky if she can even work the microwave in her dorm room.

I don't think we can draw any conclusions from this.

All we know is that a college girl claimed to a "feminist" and was also curious about a bondage book.

If she is anything like the young college girls I know, she confuses and contradicts herself about every 5 minutes.

I wouldn't form any strong beliefs based on the comments and behavior of some 18 year old chick. She will probably change her mind the next day. Just focus on banging them. Their political and social beliefs are rarely worth considering.

I agree with what you said here, because it's basically what I said. She's pretty serious about her feminism (and she's 17 and in high school) and despite her extreme intelligence (maths genius) she contradicted herself just like I expected her to, and which fits in with what you said "If she is anything like the young college girls I know...". You basically proved my point.

But I didn't understand what you meant by "I wouldn't form any strong beliefs based on the comments and behavior of some 18 year old chick." which beliefs are you referring to?

Post: #40

(03-19-2012 10:36 AM)Timoteo Wrote:  "Wax and ice play can be a bit of fun occasionally."

The wax thing takes too much work, but I've had some fun with ice. I wouldn't even consider it a prop per se. It's just a fun thing to do. You can drive chicks crazy with the warm/cold sensation on their nipples, and the clit too. I've fucked with some whipped cream and chocolate syrup on occasion also. As for the whips, chains and cuffs, no thanks. I have used a scarf or two to tie her hands to the headboard, but she could have gotten out of it anytime if she wanted.

About ice. Try eating them out with it in your mouth. Keep a small bowl of ice cubes at hand. You'll need them because they will be melting like a mother$#%er. She'll go absolutely nuts if you get it right.

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Rudyard Kipling

Post: #41

(03-28-2012 03:18 AM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  

(03-19-2012 10:36 AM)Timoteo Wrote:  "Wax and ice play can be a bit of fun occasionally."

The wax thing takes too much work, but I've had some fun with ice. I wouldn't even consider it a prop per se. It's just a fun thing to do. You can drive chicks crazy with the warm/cold sensation on their nipples, and the clit too. I've fucked with some whipped cream and chocolate syrup on occasion also. As for the whips, chains and cuffs, no thanks. I have used a scarf or two to tie her hands to the headboard, but she could have gotten out of it anytime if she wanted.

About ice. Try eating them out with it in your mouth. Keep a small bowl of ice cubes at hand. You'll need them because they will be melting like a mother$#%er. She'll go absolutely nuts if you get it right.

I've done this. After smashing I'd go in the kitchen for water, and bring back a tall glass filled with cubes and commence round two by doing this. I've actually considered one of those tiny fridges for my bedroom so I can have some ready...HA HA!

Post: #42

(03-19-2012 10:36 AM)Timoteo Wrote:  "Wax and ice play can be a bit of fun occasionally."

The wax thing takes too much work, but I've had some fun with ice. I wouldn't even consider it a prop per se. It's just a fun thing to do. You can drive chicks crazy with the warm/cold sensation on their nipples, and the clit too. I've fucked with some whipped cream and chocolate syrup on occasion also. As for the whips, chains and cuffs, no thanks. I have used a scarf or two to tie her hands to the headboard, but she could have gotten out of it anytime if she wanted.

I agree, it all takes way to much time to get into. The girl Im banging now has said she's into that kind of stuff, and wanted to look into buying some bondage gear. I said fuck that.

The next time we had sex I used the fact Im physically much stronger than her to just hold her arms down. I was able to pin them both down with one hand and keep her legs open with the other. At one point she tried to get me to stop and started to struggle, I tightened my grip and she couldn't do a thing. She just whimpered and fucking loved it.

Yet another reason to hit the gym and get strong.

Chef In Jeans
A culinary website for men

Post: #43

I convinced a girl I know to read it. She called it "Just as bad as Twilight but with more sex". Yet at the same time wants to read the sequels and finish off the trilogy. The jist of how she explained not liking it yet wanting to keep on reading can be translated from hamster speak to English as "My brain said no, but my vagina said yes."

Post: #44

Mothers Day. What's the perfect gift for Mom?

Post: #45

In the middle of an online sales battle where I sold an ereader and the woman who bought it, a month after the sale, is demanding a full refund because "the screen is broken." I asked for a picture as proof and not only had it apparently worked well enough to put a screen on it, she had clearly installed the software and bought a book, because what did the fractured screen reveal? The cover of "50 Shades of Grey".

FFS, people.

Post: #46

From Emily Gould's review:

Anastasia Steele agrees to be tutored by sadistic businessman Christian Gray after he buys her an Audi. In exchange she helps him get in touch with his bad childhood in a handful of dialogue-heavy scenes I suspect no one has ever read, possibly not even the author. Their sex life, for all its props, is pretty vanilla: a little spanking, some ice cubes, no butt stuff. Grey is all-knowing and just rough enough, never bored or indifferent or flaccid (his is possessed of "impressive length") Steele is insipid, with an improbably regenerative innocence; she is consistently surprised by the orgasms that occur every few pages like clockwork.

"My Secret Garden", Nancy Friday's 1973 compendium of female fantasy, had more kink in its pinkie finger.

Post: #47

(05-18-2012 08:19 PM)Blackhawk Wrote:  "My Secret Garden", Nancy Friday's 1973 compendium of female fantasy, had more kink in its pinkie finger.

Friday's fantasy books don't mince words. Beastiality and pedophilia are not left out. But the book doesn't give a sense of how common these are in the general population. It seems like many if not most of the girls who wrote to Friday are hypersexual, whose first sexual encounters or experiences were pre-pubescent, which is probably unrepresentative of girls as a whole.

Post: #48

I think the aspect of domaination and bondage feeds well into the "hamster" brain concept that's been brought up on RVF e.g. bitch doesn't know what she wants, she's sick of wimpy pussies who cater to her every whim, and wants a man to take control of her in the bedroom (or dungeon, in this extreme case).

Post: #49

Sorry for the double post but I can't edit this now. My boss showed me that Amazon SNL clip last week (Blackhawk), soo funny watching that in the office with the other guys. "Mommy is that a microphone?"

Post: #50

(05-19-2012 07:43 PM)basilransom Wrote:  

(05-18-2012 08:19 PM)Blackhawk Wrote:  "My Secret Garden", Nancy Friday's 1973 compendium of female fantasy, had more kink in its pinkie finger.

Friday's fantasy books don't mince words. Beastiality and pedophilia are not left out. But the book doesn't give a sense of how common these are in the general population. It seems like many if not most of the girls who wrote to Friday are hypersexual, whose first sexual encounters or experiences were pre-pubescent, which is probably unrepresentative of girls as a whole.

It kind of sounds interesting if it's stories submitted by women.