Post: #1

Okay heres the scoop.Basically im not good at speaking out to crowds of people.I have to do this on tuesday for a job interview where i have to work in teams and then speak about myself and the company in front of about 30 people.any advice?

Post: #2

Practice makes perfect for public speaking. I got lucky and my first job gave me lots of face time with customers so I got used to talking to strangers. There's not quick tip to help you, but it always helps me when I'm speaking in front of large groups to stare down the wall, or try to "look through" the peoples heads to the wall behind.

Dress well that day too, looking good means feeling good.

Chef In Jeans
A culinary website for men

Post: #3

Long-term suggestion: Find out if there's a toastmasters club in your area - they're all over the world. It's essentially a low cost course in public speaking and focuses on helping you build confidence in engaging crowds. It can be a lot of fun.

http://www.toastmasters.org/

For Tuesday's interview, I suggest rehearsing. Use a mirror and say what you'll say to the employers a few times to reduce your anxiety. Start the day well and talk to everyone for a few minutes (e.g.: the receptionist at the place you'll interview, your cab driver, coffee shop cashier) to warm yourself up. Then know that it's ok to fib and make a few mistakes here and there. Remind yourself that you need to sound confident, but don't be hard on yourself.

To speak loudly, try to project your voice. To do this, pick an object across the room and as your talk, imagine your voice projecting out of your lungs and hitting that object far away. Word after word after word, you'll automatically hear yourself getting louder and bolder. Practice a bit.

When talking in front of a group of people, use your body to express yourself as you talk about yourself. Face everyone in the room if you can, and make eye contact with several people as you talk. Imagine them soaking in the goodness coming out of your mouth.

For other interviewing tips, read this post from one of our resident patriarchs, tenderman100: /thread-6651-p...#pid93646. It's focused on Investment Banking, but I feel it's a damn good guideline for any professional white-collar job interview.

Good luck. Kick some ass, and let us know how it goes.

Post: #4

For this type of question I wouldn't follow the thrown out advice of the regulars in a forum like this. I mean no disrespect it is simply that this process is so individual that it has to be tailored. Inner game requires more work than any other skillset when it comes to gaming.

With this in mind my recommendation would be to in back to the gaming foundation and get a set of Ross Jeffries 'Unstoppable Confidence' that contains a lot of visualization exercises and NLP language. Other things that worked for me are:

*Hitting the gym. Changes your selfimage to see yourself muscular.

*Getting a degree and equivalent job. After a few years of work experience you speak with authority in your field and people LISTEN (if they are smart).

*Approach like mad! On way around this one. It might help to do it away from where you live though in order to take some pressure of. Doing it while travelling is a great start. Then again I'm one of those guys that always do better when being the away team. I'm batting World Series figures in NYC for ex.

You'll notice how I'm not adressing directly the public speaking part. This is because I don't believe in situational fixes but rather strengthening the core.

Post: #5

Weird thing, in high school I absolutely hated speaking in front of class. If I had the potential that I had to give a paper or presentation it would ruin my whole day. In college it was the same way until I had an experience where the professor grilled me in front of the class for the entire class period (50+ minutes) and I fucking loved it. A few years later, I spoke at a trade show. I was super excited about doing it and it ended up being boring. Instead of being full of hot chicks like college was, it was a bunch of old dudes yawning and texting on their phones. I've never had any motivated to speak in front of a group since, but if I was I'd be primarily worried about me trying to stay awake while doing it.

The confidence from speaking to a large audience comes from knowing what the fuck your talking about. Whatever you have to talk about, get it straight. Once you get a good start, the confidence builds on itself and its easier than talking to one person because the crowd isn't going to interrupt you.

Post: #6

thanks for the replys.itl probably only be in front of about 30 people but its still much more than what im used to.

Basically il be talking about the company itself,brown nosing them sayin this company is better than that one,talk about its strenghts etc.Ill have to speak about myself so il practice and do it in the mirror to see what the image im projecting.Il try to speak slow enough to sound confident and clear.il let you know how it goes.thanks again

Post: #7

The only quick tip that will help you out is to make sure to practice and prepare as much as possible beforehand, the better you know your stuff the less anxiety you will feel, but it will still be there. It's better to over-prepare than to just wing it, if you think you will be the nervous type.

Post: #8

I need to bump this thread. I had to give a speech yesterday in one of my classes and almost had a heart attack. My face got red, I could feel the sweat on my forehead and my mind went blank. I knew the material and had my notes ready, but just started choking. My professor did say I have a beautiful smile on my critique sheet...I don't know what that had to do with the information or speech though

I have no problem talking one on one with strangers or even small groups, but public speaking is killing me. Can't believe everyone was so smooth, because I know most of those guys would piss their pants if I made them approach girls at the mall

Post: #9

(02-08-2012 06:20 AM)houston Wrote:  I need to bump this thread. I had to give a speech yesterday in one of my classes and almost had a heart attack. My face got red, I could feel the sweat on my forehead and my mind went blank. I knew the material and had my notes ready, but just started choking. My professor did say I have a beautiful smile on my critique sheet...I don't know what that had to do with the information or speech though

I have no problem talking one on one with strangers or even small groups, but public speaking is killing me. Can't believe everyone was so smooth, because I know most of those guys would piss their pants if I made them approach girls at the mall

I had the same problem when i was at uni. I was always messing around with people in my class, i was probably the loudest cat in my class and the one who used to act dumb to make everybody laugh but when it came to present work, i would become all shy. Most of the time, i just ended up laughing or making others laugh in order to break the ice. When the presentations were more serious, i was shy (and serious) but i would still make my point.

Now at work i get caught by surprise most of the time where i have to say something in public.At first i hated it, but now im kinda getting used to it but still not 100% comfortable. Im thinking of taking public speaking classes to improve it.

What i advise you is to make sure that your physical energy is 100%, the more you work out and the strong you feel physically, the easier it will be for you to speak in public. Dont you feel more comfortable talking to people when you work out? Exactly, the same applies for when you are talking in public.

Also, dont give a fuck, try give your best when doing it, but dont give a fuck, dont think after you done with it. You did your part and thats it.

Steven Pavlina has a great article about this subject.

http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2005/05...-speaking/

Post: #10

(02-08-2012 07:34 AM)pitt Wrote:  

(02-08-2012 06:20 AM)houston Wrote:  I need to bump this thread. I had to give a speech yesterday in one of my classes and almost had a heart attack. My face got red, I could feel the sweat on my forehead and my mind went blank.

Now at work i get caught by surprise most of the time where i have to say something in public.At first i hated it, but now im kinda getting used to it but still not 100% comfortable. Im thinking of taking public speaking classes to improve it.

I do a LOT of speaking for work, so I'll pull together a sheet in a couple of days of public speaking for guys in this forum. Gaming your audience?

Post: #11

(09-25-2011 01:31 AM)Vicious Wrote:  *Hitting the gym. Changes your selfimage to see yourself muscular.

I agree with this 110%. I would suggest checking out Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, Boxing or Muay Thai as they are great ways to build confidence in every aspect of your life.

Post: #12

Thanks for the replies. I used to be so fucking shy and scared to talk to girls in school. I had to force myself to get out in the trenches and let my balls hang. Of course now, it's nothing. I'm going to get over my fear of public speaking somehow just like I did with approaching girls.

Post: #13

ha dudes relax this thread is months old!

Post: #14

Public speaking is a great way to increase social confidence.

The short answer is to simply do more repititions of whatever it is that you're scared of. If your scared to talk to girls, talk to 100 girls, if your scared to give speeches, give 100 speeches.

Facing your fear head on is the alpha thing to do!

I also recommened doing things that are much scarier then talking to girls like:

skydiving
bungee jumping
handling large snakes
fighting (like live sparring for boxing/mma)
talking to a therapist about your deepest fears (this is a highly underrated inner game tactic)

And,

Addresing your specific fears like:

heights
flying
the dark
etc.

When you eliminate your deep seeded childhood fears, all other little fears melt away. Fear and confidence are in a constant struggle to control your mind. Attack your fear and feed your confidence!

Post: #15

I've heard that visualising the crowd naked can help with the butterflies involved with public speaking.

Only problem is, that might backfire and you might end up giggling the entire time or using the podium to conceal your raging erection (especially if you are addressing a hot group).

Post: #16

A cool trick I learned in Toastmasters, if you know its going to be a presentation, before your presentation step in front of the podium and make small talk with the people closest to you. The longer your talking in front of them (thats not your presentation) the more you get over that initial anxiety by the time its time for your presentation.

Post: #17

Does Toastmasters work? To bad its not free. I see they have all kinds of events near me

Post: #18

(02-09-2012 01:14 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  Public speaking is a great way to increase social confidence.

The short answer is to simply do more repititions of whatever it is that you're scared of. If your scared to talk to girls, talk to 100 girls, if your scared to give speeches, give 100 speeches.

Facing your fear head on is the alpha thing to do!

I also recommened doing things that are much scarier then talking to girls like:

skydiving
bungee jumping
handling large snakes
fighting (like live sparring for boxing/mma)
talking to a therapist about your deepest fears (this is a highly underrated inner game tactic)

And,

Addresing your specific fears like:

heights
flying
the dark
etc.

When you eliminate your deep seeded childhood fears, all other little fears melt away. Fear and confidence are in a constant struggle to control your mind. Attack your fear and feed your confidence!

That was a very powerful post. I dont know if this holds any science proof or if you had first hand experience in this, but its something to think about. Deep shit.

Post: #19

(02-10-2012 12:47 AM)pitt Wrote:  I dont know if this holds any science proof or if you had first hand experience in this, but its something to think about. Deep shit.

This type of stuff has worked for me. I take fear elimination very serious.

Conquering my fear and feeding my confidence has been maybe the most important thing in my life the last few years. I realized that the less fear I have, the happier I am, the more free I am. That might be the most fundamental part of Game - having no fear. Its so liberating. You don't have to worry about people judging you, people liking you, or trying to fit in. You are free to just be yourself and have fun. You don't give a fuck! (when fear is gone)

I can't live with fear. I feel like a little pussy loser who is afraid to face the world. So I attack fear. I've talked to many sports psychologists and many colleagues in psychology to develop a strategy that works for my specific situation. I work hard on "inner game" because game begins in the mind.

Fear has infected many people. Everybody is so scared of everything. I can't live like that. I live for fearlessness.

Post: #20

(02-10-2012 03:01 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  

(02-10-2012 12:47 AM)pitt Wrote:  I dont know if this holds any science proof or if you had first hand experience in this, but its something to think about. Deep shit.

This type of stuff has worked for me. I take fear elimination very serious.

Conquering my fear and feeding my confidence has been maybe the most important thing in my life the last few years. I realized that the less fear I have, the happier I am, the more free I am. That might be the most fundamental part of Game - having no fear. Its so liberating. You don't have to worry about people judging you, people liking you, or trying to fit in. You are free to just be yourself and have fun. You don't give a fuck! (when fear is gone)

I can't live with fear. I feel like a little pussy loser who is afraid to face the world. So I attack fear. I've talked to many sports psychologists and many colleagues in psychology to develop a strategy that works for my specific situation. I work hard on "inner game" because game begins in the mind.

Fear has infected many people. Everybody is so scared of everything. I can't live like that. I live for fearlessness.

FUCK YOUUUUUUUUU


YOU GO HARDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD,....DAMNNNNNN


FOR REAL..DAMNNNNN..THAT WAS A POWERFUL FUCKING COMMENT..JEEZ... WHO ARE YOU NEGRO?

Damn for real, that was deep shit, thanks for sharing your strategy. I am following your advice.

Post: #21

Giovonny just one more thing. You mentioned all important things apart from working out or lifting weights, dont you think that this can be a very effective tool in eliminating fear? Dont you think that this can help eliminating fear? I find it to be very effective in my case, i would like to hear your opinion on this.

Post: #22

Lifting weights and working on all aspects of your appearance is very important!

You want to look as good as possible, of course.

But I consider that "outer game". It doesn't fix the weaknesses is your mind. (though it may help them somewhat)

I think we have to work on both at the same time.

If lifting weights works for you then of course due it hard.

But, don't ignore those little fears that are in the back of your head when you go to bed at night. If you can conquer those, you will go to another level.

I'm trying to get to an almost spiritual level where its like I'm on ecstasy even though I'm not.

/thread-6994-page-3.html

Post: #23

Thanks Gio

Do you mind if you breakdown how you go along with skydiving, bungee jumping, handling large snakes etc, i mean, do you do those activities on regular basis (for example twice a week) or you reccommend to do it for a one time life experience. I am asking this because i dont think these are activities that people do on regular basis so im just wondering how you deal with those activities and in case you dont do it on regular basis, do you think it still have the same effect to eliminate fear? I think fears can be something constant or if they go away, they are likely to comeback if you dont ''protect'' yourself, so the best way to completely eliminate fear may be to do those activities on regular basis, no? Do you do these activities on regular basis? Im just wondering how i am going to approach this, i really appreciate all the input so far.

Post: #24

I didn't know about "game" when I did those things, but now when I look back, I think those things helped me. I've only done those things once in my life and would never do them again but I'm glad I did it once. With skydiving and bungee-jumping, once is enough to shake you up a little. I thought I was dead, so when I got back on the ground I was approaching like crazy.

You should do something extreme like this asap AND find a fear eliminating exercise that you can do on a regular basis. Maybe a boxing/mma gym or a rock climbing class or firing range where you can shoot guns or surfing or something that will force you to face some fear.

AND, You should identify the top 2 or 3 fears that are holding you back from being the man you want to be and aggressively attack them.

AND, you should consider talking to a professional therapist about any fear that you may have carried from your childhood. If you have any "issues", deal with them honestly and aggressively.

Design a fear elimination game plan and get to work.

So you are doing extreme once in a lifetime stuff, regular confidence boosting maintenance, and also working on root of the problem in your mind. AND, at the same time you are improving your "outer game" in terms of appearance, vibe, and conversation.

Thats what I would do. (Thats what worked for me)

Oh, and I must admit, these helped alot too..

/thread-6998.html

Post: #25

Isolate problem areas in your life where you find yourself overly vulnerable or compliant.
Find out who or what is causing you fear or distress and confront it directly.

Here's a nice blog thread about the Reardon. I had trouble with snarky people in the past since it was too easy to engage them on their level, but now I have a nice plan of action. It works great.
http://therawness.com/my-european-trip-p...in-action/

Also, second going to the gym.