Post: #1

Hi there, my name is Heath well, I am not new to this forum, so I am going to cut to the chase in my situation and get to the point.

Recently there is this girl (basically I am 35 years old and yet she is older than me, yet acts like a girl at times). I do not want to go to a woman for advice on dealing with women.

I had a very unpleasant experience, that felt like betrayal or it WAS betrayal by this woman, I do not have any sort of sexual relationship with her, but I did "care" and I am not talking about the way a "nice guy" would supplicate and be a lap dog or whatever. After what happened to me, I walked away. Which by the way I work with her. She thinks she did or said nothing wrong, like when I am at work she tries to "talk" to me or whatever and im like "is she really oblivious?" and of course I cant say what is really on my mind and call her a fucking cunt because I can get fired for that lol.

So does anyone have any advice on handling a female co-worker who betrayed you or felt like she did?

I have already walked away, and want nothing to do with her and tend to keep my distant (talking professionally ONLY) but it still hurts me on the inside, I keep my face up til I can go somewhere along during my breaks or whatever and let all my anger and frustration out. So any other thing I can do, I am open to other suggestions.

Post: #2

"So does anyone have any advice on handling a female co-worker who betrayed you or felt like she did?"

Try not to work with women honestly. Corporate bitches are the worst.

Post: #3

Could you elaborate on this "betrayal"?
I don't see any reason for you to be hurt in this story : you don't fuck her, you avoid talking to her, where's the issue?
Just ignore her.

Post: #4

>"not new to the forum"
>not a "girl" - the *woman* involved is older than you
>you work with her
>you didn't fuck her

I'm inferring from your post that some old bitch at work was a cunt to you and you have some sort of feelings for her and that's why you're butthurt. Why? The fact that she is older than you and you haven't fucked her should absolutely disqualify her from taking up any significant thought-space in your head. Not trying to be hard on you or be an asshole but if you're not new to the forum as you mentioned you should know better.

Hit the gym, approach a young cutie, and forget her dumb ass.

Post: #5

This sounds more like "workplace" problem than "woman" problem. You're not asking for dating advice, but how to deal with a coworker who screwed you over.

However your reaction is quite intersting / telling - hurt feelings and betrayal rather than just "I hate this bitch at work".
Could you share some details? ie were you good friends before? do you have to work together, is she your boss, what was the nature of the betrayal that made you so emotional? Did she humiliate you in front of your boss? Cause you to lose a promotion?

Maybe more to the point, at 35 years old with some experience, why did you have any expectation from this woman who is just some chick at work? It's the corporate world, everyone looking out for themselves...

Post: #6

OP, you're so vague, how can you expect anyone to help you? What happened exactly?

In the modern Western workplace, it's usually best to apply the Washington Doctrine of Unstable Alliances*: Avoid entangling alliances. Don't befriend your co-workers, especially the women, discuss your out of work activities, attend non-company sanctioned after-hours social events, or bang them if you have a high-paying/high status job that you rely on.

You need to quit and find a new job or you act like nothing is wrong: Sulking like a bitch and giving her the silent treatment is just going to lead to, more, office drama which will eventually explode and result in some ugly consequences.

*This isn't applicable if you're the boss/owner or you honestly score a 20 or higher on the dating market value test for men.

Post: #7

(04-18-2019 10:45 AM)RWIsrael Wrote:  This sounds more like "workplace" problem than "woman" problem. You're not asking for dating advice, but how to deal with a coworker who screwed you over.

However your reaction is quite intersting / telling - hurt feelings and betrayal rather than just "I hate this bitch at work".
Could you share some details? ie were you good friends before? do you have to work together, is she your boss, what was the nature of the betrayal that made you so emotional? Did she humiliate you in front of your boss? Cause you to lose a promotion?

Maybe more to the point, at 35 years old with some experience, why did you have any expectation from this woman who is just some chick at work? It's the corporate world, everyone looking out for themselves...

Well the only reason why I left out details is because I knew some people were going to think I have feelings for her or something, don't get me wrong I would bang my boss if it wasn't going to cost me my job but my feelings are separate and I need my job. So I have no "Feelings" towards her, so to speak.

So to clear it up, she is one of the assistant managers whom I thought I had a good work relationship with and we even have gotten friendly off the clock, and by friendly I mean platonic. Unless you consider her reacting to me one day accusing me of giving her the cold shoulder (when I was working and not paying attention to her), I was a little surprised she was taking it personally.

so the situation. I have three coachings, (which I feel that I should not have gotten, as I said before I am new to retail, there are policies I am not aware of and NO ONE has informed me about the policies so instead I am coached about things I had no knowledge of). I work in maintenance which I plan to get out of soon as my coachings dropped and what I was coached for is absolutely ridiculous.

My current supervisor the assistant manager I am talking about, I informed her of a situation that I will need to find a job on the side because I need a full time position, well she approved of one of our maintenance members to go into another position and well I got extra hours (a part time associate working full time hours for at least a month), so with him transferred it opened up doors, but there is a problem, I am not a full time associate which I need to be. I talked with her about this so she had a talk with co manager ,and they said I will be on "Trial" for full time when my coaching fall off which is January 6 of next year! My supervisor and my co-manager were both there about it.

Co manager and Store manager tells me on trial, A couple of days ago from now. I considered it a good thing and I thought that is what those extra hours for to see if I can handle it for til January 6 and I have no issue with it but NOW my supervisor is telling me I am NOT on trial for a full time position! She says its not in her terminology. So I went to go ask Store manager and co-manager if I really was on trial or not, they said I am while my supervisor is telling me something different! My blood was boiling in the office when she was talking to me. I wanted to say "fuck you cunt!".

Later on that day, me and my supervisor talked, well I asked her what will happen to my hours if we get 2 new associates? She responded I have no control over that, and that the 2 new associates will be part time just like me, and well I been there longer, I thought I was on trial for full time? She came across like I am no better than I was before? it felt like she was putting me down. I like my supervisor but when she told me these things, it made me feel distrustful and VERY PISSED OFF, and well, I wont lie, it did "hurt". But I don't want to go to anymore managers, they are mostly female and they are a pain my motherf*cking ass.

So what the fuck. I mean I am suppose to be "respectful" no matter what according to the work tenets or I can get in trouble. I mean how the hell, how the hell am I suppose to treat her after she did this to me and how can I do it without getting fired? Like some of the posters said, it is probably best to ignore her. Well I cant really do that since she is my supervisor, I did think about keeping my interactions short and saying nothing of what im thinking, feeling and just really distancing myself.

Post: #8

(04-18-2019 10:27 AM)BlastbeatCasanova Wrote:  >"not new to the forum"
>not a "girl" - the *woman* involved is older than you
>you work with her
>you didn't fuck her

I'm inferring from your post that some old bitch at work was a cunt to you and you have some sort of feelings for her and that's why you're butthurt. Why? The fact that she is older than you and you haven't fucked her should absolutely disqualify her from taking up any significant thought-space in your head. Not trying to be hard on you or be an asshole but if you're not new to the forum as you mentioned you should know better.

Hit the gym, approach a young cutie, and forget her dumb ass.

Lol now I like this response its straight to the point and honest. But regardless whether I want to bang her or not, I still think it applies to my situation so thanks anyway.

Post: #9

Holy shit, a rambling, incoherent, unreadable wall of text with sprinklings of what I can only assume is janitor jargon.

Get another job.

Post: #10

OP, your leaving out this woman was your direct supervisor is a huge omission. She's in the perfect position to fuck you over if she ever gets pissed at your passive-aggressive "I'm not talking to you" behavior. That's bitch behavior and you're a man: Do the job till you find something better.

Lots of places use a rotating staff of part-time employees because they only have to pay certain benefits to full-time employees. Or it could be another reason. Sounds like you're in a low-skill, entry-level position so you're very replaceable, don't think of vengeance...while you're there.

Malone's right. Quit and find a new job. A part-time maintenance, sounds like a euphemism for "janitor" to me, isn't worth this stress it's causing you(nor is it worth a thread).

Post: #11

(04-19-2019 01:02 PM)Goldin Boy Wrote:  OP, your leaving out this woman was your direct supervisor is a huge omission. She's in the perfect position to fuck you over if she ever gets pissed at your passive-aggressive "I'm not talking to you" behavior. That's bitch behavior and you're a man: Do the job till you find something better.

Lots of places use a rotating staff of part-time employees because they only have to pay certain benefits to full-time employees. Or it could be another reason. Sounds like you're in a low-skill, entry-level position so you're very replaceable, don't think of vengeance...while you're there.

Malone's right. Quit and find a new job. A part-time maintenance, sounds like a euphemism for "janitor" to me, isn't worth this stress it's causing you(nor is it worth a thread).

We may not agree on much here on this board -- we debate a lot -- the one thing that we understand is: women betray men. Constantly. All day, all night, all year, for all of history. It's not evil, it's just their nature and natural instincts.

They expect you as the man to die to protect them...never the other way around. That is wired into their brains and it impacts every part of their world view.

Repeat this to yourself: "Every woman in the world, maybe with the exception of my mother or sisters, will throw me under the bus and not feel a twinge of guilt".

Repeat that 50 times every morning and every night before bed.

Then repeat this: "Women at work will not only throw me under the bus, but knife me in the back before throwing me under the bus. Women at work hate my guts just because I'm a man. If I have a woman manager, I must be ready at any moment to be knifed."

Post: #12

^ Truer words might never have been written on RVF! Ironically, having a MAJOR CUNT as a superior is motivating me to get my money Right! There's always light at the end of the Tunnel!

Post: #13

(04-19-2019 11:39 AM)Heath0888 Wrote:  

(04-18-2019 10:45 AM)RWIsrael Wrote:  This sounds more like "workplace" problem than "woman" problem. You're not asking for dating advice, but how to deal with a coworker who screwed you over.

However your reaction is quite intersting / telling - hurt feelings and betrayal rather than just "I hate this bitch at work".
Could you share some details? ie were you good friends before? do you have to work together, is she your boss, what was the nature of the betrayal that made you so emotional? Did she humiliate you in front of your boss? Cause you to lose a promotion?

Maybe more to the point, at 35 years old with some experience, why did you have any expectation from this woman who is just some chick at work? It's the corporate world, everyone looking out for themselves...

Well the only reason why I left out details is because I knew some people were going to think I have feelings for her or something, don't get me wrong I would bang my boss if it wasn't going to cost me my job but my feelings are separate and I need my job. So I have no "Feelings" towards her, so to speak.

So to clear it up, she is one of the assistant managers whom I thought I had a good work relationship with and we even have gotten friendly off the clock, and by friendly I mean platonic. Unless you consider her reacting to me one day accusing me of giving her the cold shoulder (when I was working and not paying attention to her), I was a little surprised she was taking it personally.

so the situation. I have three coachings, (which I feel that I should not have gotten, as I said before I am new to retail, there are policies I am not aware of and NO ONE has informed me about the policies so instead I am coached about things I had no knowledge of). I work in maintenance which I plan to get out of soon as my coachings dropped and what I was coached for is absolutely ridiculous.

My current supervisor the assistant manager I am talking about, I informed her of a situation that I will need to find a job on the side because I need a full time position, well she approved of one of our maintenance members to go into another position and well I got extra hours (a part time associate working full time hours for at least a month), so with him transferred it opened up doors, but there is a problem, I am not a full time associate which I need to be. I talked with her about this so she had a talk with co manager ,and they said I will be on "Trial" for full time when my coaching fall off which is January 6 of next year! My supervisor and my co-manager were both there about it.

Co manager and Store manager tells me on trial, A couple of days ago from now. I considered it a good thing and I thought that is what those extra hours for to see if I can handle it for til January 6 and I have no issue with it but NOW my supervisor is telling me I am NOT on trial for a full time position! She says its not in her terminology. So I went to go ask Store manager and co-manager if I really was on trial or not, they said I am while my supervisor is telling me something different! My blood was boiling in the office when she was talking to me. I wanted to say "fuck you cunt!".

Later on that day, me and my supervisor talked, well I asked her what will happen to my hours if we get 2 new associates? She responded I have no control over that, and that the 2 new associates will be part time just like me, and well I been there longer, I thought I was on trial for full time? She came across like I am no better than I was before? it felt like she was putting me down. I like my supervisor but when she told me these things, it made me feel distrustful and VERY PISSED OFF, and well, I wont lie, it did "hurt". But I don't want to go to anymore managers, they are mostly female and they are a pain my motherf*cking ass.

So what the fuck. I mean I am suppose to be "respectful" no matter what according to the work tenets or I can get in trouble. I mean how the hell, how the hell am I suppose to treat her after she did this to me and how can I do it without getting fired? Like some of the posters said, it is probably best to ignore her. Well I cant really do that since she is my supervisor, I did think about keeping my interactions short and saying nothing of what im thinking, feeling and just really distancing myself.

If this store is part of a chain or large corporate op, what you do is elevate the problem above the store level. District HR or a "confidential (but not really) report line." Your position at work is suffering because you didn't reciprocate her advance. The advance was only clear to her, but now she is retaliating in the workplace.

Post: #14

A guy of your age worried about this, is worrisome!