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After ejecting the set, a girl tries to avoid you?
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Sebastian Offline
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Post: #1
After ejecting the set, a girl tries to avoid you?
This happens all the time and I am wondering if I had a creepy vibe when approaching.

I approached this girl, had some small chat. Since she was just answering my questions and not asking back, paying attention to her friends, I told her nice meeting you and left her in 3 minutes.

When I run into her later, I could tell she was trying to avoid me (looking other ways when walking by)

When this happend, it makes me wonder since I didn't do anything sexual, didn't say something sexual or obnoxious, didn't follow her around etc.

Does this happen to you all the time?
Is it because they are not just into you? 'oh if I smile at this guy, he will talk to me again. I shouldn't even look at him'

Should I treat it like no big deal like when a girl says 'I have a bf'?
09-30-2012 08:17 PM
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Deluge Offline
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Post: #2
RE: After ejecting the set, a girl tries to avoid you?
(09-30-2012 08:17 PM)Sebastian Wrote:  This happens all the time and I am wondering if I had a creepy vibe when approaching.

If you think you're coming off as creepy while approaching, she will probably be creeped out. There's so much subtle, non-verbal communication (body language, voice, eye contact) signs that she can use to read your vibe without even knowing and get "creeped out" by you. On the flip, if you expect the approach to go well, you will see the reverse of this in action. How you feel becomes what she feels.

(09-30-2012 08:17 PM)Sebastian Wrote:  When this happend, it makes me wonder since I didn't do anything sexual, didn't say something sexual or obnoxious, didn't follow her around etc.

It sounds like you were too overeager in your mannerisms. Too happy just to be talking to her, too excited, too needy, too approval seeking, basically out of whack emotionally. To be blunt, these types of things repulse women. The thing is that most newbies won't realize that they're doing this because they get excited and lose self-social awareness so it's good that you've noticed this. Slow down your speech, RELAX and also pay attention to your facial expressions. Try and emulate a more suave, seductive vibe and get a more experienced guy to watch your approaches and critic your body language and facial expressions. Maybe even audio record your approaches to work on your vocal tone.

(09-30-2012 08:17 PM)Sebastian Wrote:  Should I treat it like no big deal like when a girl says 'I have a bf'?

Ignore and plough unless she's giving you (other?) signs that she's not interested like the girl in your post did.
(This post was last modified: 09-30-2012 10:51 PM by Deluge.)
09-30-2012 10:50 PM
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HiFlo Offline
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Post: #3
RE: After ejecting the set, a girl tries to avoid you?
Hey, this happens quite a bit to me too. Actually, it's happening less now, but still there are those times it does happen for whatever reason.

The best thing to do is face the fact that you are NOT gonna fuck her tonight or the next weekend you see her in a club. But don't write her off or be afraid of her because let's say in 3 months down the line you may have improved your game so you have that social proof and groupthink will make her little gina tingle for you.

What I do for girls who told me to fuck off or whatever is one of few things:

1) just ignore them the next time you see them. whatever, they don't matter.

2) go up to them with a strong ass frame with a genuine big smile and be like, "It's so good to see you again. How you been? You havin a good time? You look like you're the life of the party here!" The key is an unflappable frame where you (pretend) to genuinely be excited to see them again and that according to you, the interaction just went fine last time. Plow on as long as you can about good vibes and shit. This is the best method.

3) Sometimes I feel like being a dick and be all sarcastic like, "Oh, im so glad i ran into you again. i thought i'd never see you again. i thought you were the love of my life. it so good to see you again. god i missed you so much." This shows that you just don't give a fuck, and has some benefit.

4) If I feel like bein a dick and I notice she's intentionally ignoring me, I'll strike an alpha pose nearby (sit cool on a pool table, or lean against a nearby wall) and practically shout, "I know you see me, I know you see me, I know you wanna say hello. Say hi, be nice, say hi." It creates a bit of attention, but again shows that you just don't give a fuck and if you're frame is strong enough actually makes the girl feel a little awkward. This doesn't work too well, but sometimes you just feel like being a dick and don't give a fuck.

Anyway, those are the methods I'm using. I've noticed that the tables can and will turn though, and that although you may have creeped them out once several months ago, they may be attracted to you today because of social proof and groupthink that you're a cool dude.
(This post was last modified: 10-01-2012 12:15 PM by HiFlo.)
10-01-2012 12:13 PM
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