Post: #1

Been Having alot of realizations about my life in general lately and am feeling it would be a good idea to get an unbiased professional opinion. Problem is i don't know where to start. I don't want to get ripped off as im assuming these people don't come cheap and i don't want to find out mid way through the first session that this person either has no experience with my mindframe or just wants to prescribe me drugs.

Has anybody gone through this process before? what sort of time frame do these people usually work on. Is there any way of screening them to see if they have experience in my area? I'm located in Aus by the way.

Any help appreciated

Post: #2

Imo, a lot of people who go to see a shrink walk away worse and over-medicated. My favorite self-therapy- 1) dinner w/friends and discuss 2) smoke tree and bump old school rap (old rap Gs have see and been through it all. hard knocks....) 3)exercise.

Shrinks make money by making you come back time and time again. I am not in favor of a profession which proffeses to cure you, but whose income relies upon repeat clientele.

Just my 2c.

Post: #3

(11-09-2012 05:55 PM)DVY Wrote:  Imo, a lot of people who go to see a shrink walk away worse and over-medicated. My favorite self-therapy- 1) dinner w/friends and discuss 2) smoke tree and bump old school rap (old rap Gs have see and been through it all. hard knocks....) 3)exercise.

Shrinks make money by making you come back time and time again. I am not in favor of a profession which proffeses to cure you, but whose income relies upon repeat clientele.

Just my 2c.

I'd have to disagree with that. I went to a shrink for a while and it did me a lot of good. I'm sure it depends on the shrink, but the right professional for the right person can work wonders.

I haven't seen one since high school but am seriously considering renewing the practice. I still have a lot of things in my life to work out, and sometimes verbalizing it to someone with a level-head and open mind is all you really need.

I do agree with you that many are too quick to medicate you when it's unnecessary. Most of us have everything we need to control our behavior and mindset already within us.

To the OP, try a couple out until you find one that clicks. In the initial interview, ask them about their methods and their beliefs about medicating for psychological difficulties.

At the end of the day, it's your decision, and it should be someone you're comfortable with.

My first therapist was a perfect fit. His main niche was counseling Vietnam veterans with PTSD, so he had a pretty realistic view of the world and wasn't all cheeseball - I never felt like he was talking down to me or too beyond my world to understand where I was coming from. Since I'm currently in my home-town temporarily, I'm thinking about looking him up again to see if he's still practicing.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling

Post: #4

One thing to consider there are 2 uses for a psychologist

1) vent - thats what most people need and spend big $ on someone to listen to the without judging

2) advice - what to do, help them find the solutions, prescribe medicine


Assuming you havent thought about killing yourself you dont need a shrink. You need a friend, peferably a smart friend whom you trust to tell you like it is. Sadly enough many people dont have those kinds of friends then can vent to or that will give them countless pep talks through fear of failure or difficult times.

I recommend you go to trusted friends and family first but if thats not an option look into some sort of coach or life coach or some generic title on guru.com or odesk. Could probably get it done for $5-10 dollars an hour but likely for below minimum wage.

Why do I recommend this? Ive found from my own experiences that shrinks just arent worth it, most of them are usueless past the venting phase and will literally repeat "you cant control it" hundreds of times over the course of a year.... needless to say I now talk to friends when I want advice or have problems

Post: #5

I agree with the Poster above Having a friend or Friends who are honest with you and that you can Trust is the best Idea.

Or Even somebody Older that Hase been True it all and you Trust aswell. I enjoy beeing Alone so I used Meditation and EfT to work on my Own Issues and I still do Daily to make myself mor effektive or Deal with Stress and Emotions.

Depression and Manic Episodes used to be a Big Part of my Life and Even though I had a Nice childhood I habe been to alot of cracy Stuff in my Late Teens and early twentys.

I have been True periods of sadness, Self hate and the thoughts of wanting to jump from a Bridge since Life didn't make any Sense to me anymore. I know how it is to See and think thinks that don't exist and Having to Deal with that.

I went to psychiatrist ect but that didn't help me they just gave me Medication that made Things worse and a Shrink just made ms feel Goo

My Solution was defining my Own Purpose and Finding back to my Vision which is the reason I am actualy still able to sit here and Write.

Plus Improoving my Quality of Life and eleminating Stress and Bad people from it. I don't Drink I don't smoke I relax everyday I Cook Healthy Food, I am Financialy Independent and making Money is Low Stress I allready have achieved Most of what I need to a Great degree and mooving to Brasilia will Improove that Even more.

Being Able to Plann my das Ase I want to, Eat Healthy, Excercise, Cook, Make Money, Have People arround me that I Love and Trust and beeing gratefull everyday is what keeps me in a Great headspace and if i do get a Problem I have the Tools to Solve it.

The Message: Find what Works for you and Not what society want's you to work for you..... If a shrink works for you why Not ?

There is a Post on Postmasculin about Therapy I think the author is Even on this forrum called entropy.

So if Therapy is for you just google the Bloq and you can find the Post. Maybe that can help you Out more.

Take Care
Eric

Post: #6

Know the difference between a psychiatrist and a psychologist. The psychiatrist writes prescriptions and so he/she will be quick to do so.

A psychologist doesn't (can't, actually) write prescriptions and so will use talk therapy.

Both are incentivized to have you return on a very regular basis.

Post: #7

(11-12-2012 09:33 AM)Private Man Wrote:  Know the difference between a psychiatrist and a psychologist. The psychiatrist writes prescriptions and so he/she will be quick to do so.

A psychologist doesn't (can't, actually) write prescriptions and so will use talk therapy.

Both are incentivized to have you return on a very regular basis.

Yes that is right: I know the difference and I have experience with both. The problem is they need you to make Money

Post: #8

Buy a book. Anything by Milton H Erikson is gold. He walks you through different cases he's worked.
I'm sure you've lived a few of the same scenarios that you'll read about. He breaks it down very well
on what the underlying issue was and how he handled it with the patient. Good stuff.

I recommend this book.



http://www.amazon.com/Uncommon-Therapy-P...+H+Erikson

Post: #9

(11-11-2012 11:10 AM)defguy Wrote:  Assuming you havent thought about killing yourself you dont need a shrink. You need a friend, peferably a smart friend whom you trust to tell you like it is.

do these types of friend exist?

Post: #10

I addressed this before here:

/thread-17382.html

A lot of commenters here don't like the idea of therapy. There as always to my knowledge been a "wise man" character in all cultures in virtually all times to whom people go at transitional stages.

When religion was more universal, maybe it was priests, sometimes military leaders, teachers of various sorts.

You would have to believe you know everything you need to know and can objectively look at yourself ( this is what's basically impossible) or that your friends are objective and honest and know everything you need to know to think you can just do everything on your own, or chatting with your friends.

It saves a LOT of time if you can talk to someone who's seen something similar to your problem set hundreds of times.

Post: #11

@iknowexactly- I agree with your point. The ISSUE is that priest/military leaders/teachers goals were aligned with yours. They did it for personal/professional satisfaction and not as a way to make money off you.

I dont like haphazardly recommending drugs, but shrooms were my personal therapy.

There is a lot of research on it and PTSD victims. The best is to take a larger dose under controlled supervision in a quiet naturey place. Little risk of personal harm or addiction.

Post: #12

I agree with the other posters. Avoid a psychiatrist, they will write you a prescription in 30 minutes. A psychologist / therapist is who you want to talk to. Do you have insurance? You might be able to get a few free in person or even phone sessions with a therapist. Definitely talk to a man, not a woman. Look for someone that listens and makes you feel confident after the session. Don't let someone fuck with your head - some will!! If you don't like them on to the next one.

Post: #13

Therapists basically fucked my ex-wife up even more than she already was, and couples therapy was a fricken' joke. So I gotta admit, I don't have much respect for the profession. If you're bent on doing this, shop the hell around.

Post: #14

(11-19-2012 05:49 PM)Stitch Wrote:  Therapists basically fucked my ex-wife up even more than she already was, and couples therapy was a fricken' joke. So I gotta admit, I don't have much respect for the profession. If you're bent on doing this, shop the hell around.

This is for the USA--There were a LOT of pissed-off, not too bright feminists in my graduate school. I mentioned that in my post I linked to I believe. I'd say it's just like plumbers, car mechanics, etc-- most people are just not that good at their profession.

I'd say where I went 1/3 might be bad, 1/3 mediocre and 1/3 good overall. Better odds with the guys-- more humility and sympathy for what a guy puts up with. Probably better if you go with a guy, less self-delusion, especially an OLDER guy...Some of the feminist chicks are just going to ally with your chick to turn her against you.

Post: #15

(11-19-2012 04:54 PM)DVY Wrote:  @iknowexactly- I agree with your point. The ISSUE is that priest/military leaders/teachers goals were aligned with yours. They did it for personal/professional satisfaction and not as a way to make money off you.

Priests and military aligned with the individual? The church needs your money just like shrinks do. And the military guy if your superior... may want you to get killed.

Post: #16

(11-22-2012 08:57 PM)iknowexactly Wrote:  

(11-19-2012 05:49 PM)Stitch Wrote:  Therapists basically fucked my ex-wife up even more than she already was, and couples therapy was a fricken' joke. So I gotta admit, I don't have much respect for the profession. If you're bent on doing this, shop the hell around.

This is for the USA--There were a LOT of pissed-off, not too bright feminists in my graduate school. I mentioned that in my post I linked to I believe. I'd say it's just like plumbers, car mechanics, etc-- most people are just not that good at their profession.

I'd say where I went 1/3 might be bad, 1/3 mediocre and 1/3 good overall. Better odds with the guys-- more humility and sympathy for what a guy puts up with. Probably better if you go with a guy, less self-delusion, especially an OLDER guy...Some of the feminist chicks are just going to ally with your chick to turn her against you.

Yeah good point I used to hate doctors and think they were all incompetent quacks.
Recently I went to some real specialists to get my knee checked out and these guys were fucking pros and really impressed me with their professionalism and attitude. They restored my faith back into the profession of doctors. So if you can find a *GOOD* therapist I guess he could help.

Post: #17

What makes for good therapy though? Are there doctors that actually intend to retrain or reframe your views?

Post: #18

Yeah Cognitive Behaviour Therapy focusses on reframing your viewpoints and thought patterns. Thats the one I would go for, I think a good CBT therapist could really help and keep you on track.

Other forms of therapy will rely on medicating you or babbling about your childhood for hours and getting you co-dependent to your therapist. Not so good.

Post: #19

I heard once that if you go see a shrink it goes on your medical record, and can be accessed by people during thorough (IE Government) background checks or by your health insurance company. I don't know if it's true, but I thought I'd pass it along.

Post: #20

Strongly suggest you look at the newer cutting-edge psychotherapies:

-Internal Family Systems(not about families. it's about you, and your inner "family" of the different sides of your personality. Very effective)
-Ego States Therapy
-Coherence Therapy
(All a strong focus for healing issues safely, permanently and effectively)

-Client-Centered therapy
(not directly targetted to healing issues, but good for general support and being heard, which can also resolve things anyway)

and largely AVOID Cognitive/Behavioural therapy, psychoanalysis, psychiatry (drugs), NLP, hypnotherapy and any new-age energy therapies.

Psychoanalysis (endlessly intellectually exploring childhood) and Psychiatry( drugging you) are decades old and barking up the wrong tree. People can have 10 years of Psychoanalysis and still have the exact same issue. The other ones can have some value but the practitioners are too unpredictable and the models are lacking in some major areas.

(This post is all merely my own opinion and experience btw - don't take it as authoritative or any sort of mental health advice, by any means)

Post: #21

I've heard positive things about this book, it's about altering one's self-image.



Has someone tried the techniques described in the book?

Post: #22

(11-24-2012 06:39 PM)RichieP Wrote:  Strongly suggest you look at the newer cutting-edge psychotherapies:

-Internal Family Systems(not about families. it's about you, and your inner "family" of the different sides of your personality. Very effective)
-Ego States Therapy
-Coherence Therapy
(All a strong focus for healing issues safely, permanently and effectively)

-Client-Centered therapy
(not directly targetted to healing issues, but good for general support and being heard, which can also resolve things anyway)

and largely AVOID Cognitive/Behavioural therapy, psychoanalysis, psychiatry (drugs), NLP, hypnotherapy and any new-age energy therapies.

Psychoanalysis (endlessly intellectually exploring childhood) and Psychiatry( drugging you) are decades old and barking up the wrong tree. People can have 10 years of Psychoanalysis and still have the exact same issue. The other ones can have some value but the practitioners are too unpredictable and the models are lacking in some major areas.

(This post is all merely my own opinion and experience btw - don't take it as authoritative or any sort of mental health advice, by any means)

Can you elaborate why you dont recommend Cognitive Behaviour therapy?
CBT was proven to be more effective than drugs and has a strong scientific background. Im working with the book "Feeling Good" from Dr. Burns right now and its helping me alot so far. Its great to reframe negative self-talk.

Post: #23

Depending on your health insurance, it may be covered, thus eliminating the cost issue. I found it helpful in dealing with a temporary crisis type issue. Probably better to see a man. No therapist is going to tell you banging as many chicks as possible is the way to go, so just know that going in. They have their own biases, but certain insights are helpful. Their instinct will be to feminize you and treat your desire to dominate as a sickness. You don't need any drugs, so don't take them. It's that simple.

And yes, your therapist will never say, "Ok I think you're cured, you don't need to come anymore," so when you feel you're done just stop making appointments.

Post: #24

woot - As I said in the post, basically I think there's value in it but the practitioners vary too much ( some are really waaay too goal oriented and businesslike and can turn patients against their own emotions) and the method is misguided.

http://psychminded.co.uk/news/news2009/m...cbt003.htm

Oliver James has the right idea.
A review of patients two years after CBT found that two thirds have relapsed or sought further help for the same symptoms. 33% success rate isnt success IMO. That would suggest it's a temporary fix, not getting to the root causes.

Reframing negative self-talk can be useful, but for some people it's just setting up an inner conflict. Countering negative thoughts with positive doesnt always make the negative part of you any better, in fact it can make it more extreme.

I think the IFS / Ego states model is just far more accurate and respectful of our inner worlds. From their point of view, negative self-talk comes from a Part of you that has a reason for why it's being like that. "Answering" it or reframing it could help it soften or be more reasonable, or it could just make that part of you more adamant in it's negativity. This can set up what's called a polarization, and it doesn't make things better.

That said, if you genuinely find it's helping, it probably is. It definitely does help some people. I just dont think it's consistent enough, and I have big issues with their framework.

If you're having negative, self-defeating or undermining self-talk, I highly recommend the IFS book "Self Therapy for your Inner Critic". Really good stuff.

Post: #25

Hm interesting the article criticizes CBT and says its only a band-aid and doesnt work on root causes of anxiety and depression.
That is not true from my understanding of CBT, in the book I mentioned there is a technique specifically designed to uncover root causes of anxiety/depression and then reframe them.

I think the core technique of CBT is pretty genius because you dont just talk back and force happy thoughts, instead you discover how illogical and distorted thought patterns are and they lose their power. Of course it wont help or work for everyone but that doesnt discredit it as a technique (and is in itself a cognitive distortion "all or nothing thinking").

I will check out the book you mentioned.