Post: #1

Like most guys who grew up introverted, in the past I've had a hard time annunciating my words. I'd mumble or speak so damn fast that everything I said blurred together and I'd straight up be dropping consonants and vowels from words because they were coming out so fast.

It was so bad, that I saw myself speaking on video one time and it sounded like I was panicking because I was talking so fast!

You know you have an issue when people constantly are saying "what?" and "huh?" during conversations.

So I developed this little trick that seems to be helping a lot. The hard part is remembering to actually do it, and once it's in action I've noticed a real improvement in vocal clarity.

The trick is, when you're talking to someone just imagine you're speaking to them on a two-way radio. In my job I talk to people on radios and clarity is super-important because you don't want to have to repeat yourself, and numbers and words have to be unmistakable.

Even if you've never spoken on a radio before, you can probably imagine what it's like and how much clearer you would speak than just rambling on in normal conversation.

Once you flip this switch and imagine you're on a radio, your words will slow down and annunciation will be more deliberate. Each word will have it's own structure, instead of an entire sentence being spat out in one breath.

If you talk fast like I do, your speech rate will be slower and maybe even sound normal. Although I've noticed that even when I slow down my speech rate to what I consider "slow", it's still fast. So I have to make it "ultra-slow" to sound "normal" to other people.

I figured there are definitely some smart guys on here whose mouths can't keep up with their brains. Wanted to share this little tip and see if it helps any one else.

Post: #2

A trick i've learned from an old lawyer is to wait 5-10 seconds before responding in conversation.

Benefits:
1. You come across as more thoughtful;
2. Because you are. You have time to measure your words and thoughts and they come across as weighted and deliberate when you voice them.
3. Adds to the aloof vibe.

Try it.

(Steady eye contact as bonus intensifier)

Post: #3

(02-10-2013 12:52 AM)Sombro Wrote:  A trick i've learned from an old lawyer is to wait 5-10 seconds before responding in conversation.

Benefits:
1. You come across as more thoughtful;
2. Because you are. You have time to measure your words and thoughts and they come across as weighted and deliberate when you voice them.
3. Adds to the aloof vibe.

Try it.

(Steady eye contact as bonus intensifier)

Ten seconds is a long time. Maybe in a court room that works but in a one-on-one conversation, ten seconds without responding to someone will make them think you are ignoring them.

Conversation King by the Day Game guys from London talk about this. I had a phone interview for a job a while ago where I used that trick beautifully...Whenever the interviewer would ask me a question, I would count in my head, "One...Two...Three...", then respond slowly. He definitely thought I was thinking about his questions and not all jumpy.

Another thing I like is to just not say anything, and maintain eye contact. I do this at fast-food places with the cashiers. Convo will go,

Cashier: Hey, welcome to __!
Me: Hey, how are you?
Cashier: Good, you?
Me, smiling: Good!
Her, smiling: .................................
Me, smiling, direct eye contact: .................................
Her, laughing: What can I get you?

Think I'll start saying something like, "you just got lost in my eyes, didn't you?"

Post: #4

(02-09-2013 09:57 PM)Checkmat Wrote:  I figured there are definitely some smart guys on here whose mouths can't keep up with their brains. Wanted to share this little tip and see if it helps any one else.

I think this has to do with an poorly developed motor-jaw-tongue-movement pathways in the brain, which is a seperate section to that which decides on what to say.

Practice talking out loud will over time cement the pathways and make them more co-ordinated. Maybe even read out loud, if you have no one to practice speaking to.

Prolonged silence over several days is probably enough to cause the pathways to degenerate (the same way you forget stuff from your memory if you don't revise it often enough) so frequent practice is required, this isn't something you can do once a week.

Post: #5

There's also a nice CD series that would definitely help you if you're willing to invest a little money in it. It's called the sound of your voice by Dr Carol Flemming. I've used it personnaly and it's fantastic. You can buy it on Amazon or ebay I believe.