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Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
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nek Offline
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Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
It's something I've been noticing a lot lately, but it seems to me the witty/funny guys get girls attention, but it's more friendzone like than sexual. As in, they want to hang out with these guys, enjoy their entertainment, but aren't sexually pining for them. When it comes to a raw sexual attraction, being laconic seems to appeal to them more. Even for me I've noticed it. I use to be the more gregarious, funny-guy type. I always had girls and people I was hanging out with, and they'd call to hang out, but sexually it wasn't working out as much as you'd think it should. As I've gotten older I've become more to myself, even in social settings. I don't have as many girls calling to hang out and my weekends aren't booked with events to go to but the female attention I get is more sexual in nature.

For instance, one of the guys I hang out with is really funny and he hangs out with the girls in this group quite often (they have each other's numbers and invite each other out all the time to events and what not), but when this guy tries to escalate with these girls it goes no where (they haven't hooked up with him according to reports, which I believe based on my observations as well). I'm more of a fringe guy in this group and I don't have as much to say as I don't hang out with them as much and come off as more laconic/terse. However, when I do interact with the girls it doesn't have the "friend" tone that I perceive in their interactions with the other guy. So all this is starting to make me think that the humor thing is a bit overrated. Does anyone else notice the same thing?

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06-02-2013 01:06 PM
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iknowexactly Offline
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
Good observations, for myself I see humor as an asset, but it has to be timed; much like calling her a dirty whore and ass-pounding has to be timed right.

The people I've known who are always joking- that's a sexual negative, as you say.

It keeps communication superficial and continually de-escalates sexual tension.

But to the degree you focus on sexual escalation and THEN (later) use humor so the relationship is more varied and enjoyable, I think it's a good thing. Also, if you are a naturally humorous person the sexual escalation witll have a background feel of humor which makes it more fun and less threatening. Also, I speculate humor shows reproductive fitness because it is evidence of cognitive flexibility and social awareness.

I speculate it's one of those things where you've got to prove yourself as willing to escalate FIRST, as this willingness is the more rare quality now in emasculated America. (In my SWPL area it seems emasculated as shown by the groups of 3,4,5 7+ chicks scouting around.)

Then when you're seen as a source of sex, you can add humor to keep it from being one dimensional.

I had a really hot squirter 18 YO when I was 30, ( l was lying saying I was 27) and the relationship was too limited to sex. She complained "I feel like your little call girl." and ditched me for a more romantic guy. This was decades ago, before femasculation, but I think it still true to some extent. Women want more than sex eventually unless they are particularly hardened. Sex itself is always available to them in its crudest, least artistic forms, like (in the US) you don't worry where your next drink of water is coming from, faucets are everywhere.

So naturally, they are spoiled and want more than just the sex act, they want fun, romance, your house and 30% of your income for the next 50 years.

It's optimal to give a good one some, but not all, of that.
(This post was last modified: 06-02-2013 01:27 PM by iknowexactly.)
06-02-2013 01:17 PM
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nek Offline
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
(06-02-2013 01:17 PM)iknowexactly Wrote:  I see humor as an asset, but it has to be timed; much like calling her a dirty whore and ass-pounding has to be timed right.

I feel like this should be a proverb

Civilize the mind but make savage the body.
06-02-2013 01:31 PM
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
Everybody wants to be around a fun person. However, in terms of getting laid, it depends on how you will use your humour. I have seen guys who were really funny and didnt get laid, i have also seen guys who were really funny and fucked a lot, and guess what was the difference between them? The latter guys made their sexual intentions clear. Its not just being funny, you need to act like you want to fuck and you will fuck her, otherwise you will be put on friend zone.

Also,limit the number of jokes. You don't want to be too funny. If you can't control your humour, convert your humour into sexual humour. Give her sexual jokes. Don't forget to touch her, neg her and go for the bang.
06-02-2013 01:55 PM
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
Honestly, besides my physique, I think the only reason why I get laid is because I can make bitches laugh. This is paired with game staples like (in)direct flirting, injection of sexuality, and kino of course. If you rely too much on one trait (body, laughter, boldness, money, status) you're eventually going to plateau so if you truly inspire to be a formidable play boy or whatever you need to be well rounded.
06-02-2013 03:26 PM
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All or Nothing Offline
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
(06-02-2013 01:06 PM)nek Wrote:  It's something I've been noticing a lot lately, but it seems to me the witty/funny guys get girls attention, but it's more friendzone like than sexual. As in, they want to hang out with these guys, enjoy their entertainment, but aren't sexually pining for them. When it comes to a raw sexual attraction, being laconic seems to appeal to them more. Even for me I've noticed it. I use to be the more gregarious, funny-guy type. I always had girls and people I was hanging out with, and they'd call to hang out, but sexually it wasn't working out as much as you'd think it should. As I've gotten older I've become more to myself, even in social settings. I don't have as many girls calling to hang out and my weekends aren't booked with events to go to but the female attention I get is more sexual in nature.

I think being funny is one of the most attractive traits a man can have. It's one of the best ways to auto-correct an interaction that might have some bad vibes going on.

Also, what better way is there to sexualize a conversation than through humor? You can jokingly reference things like taking her back to your place. What's even better about this, is that since it is through humor, she cannot know for sure if you are serious but the idea of her having sex with you is implanted in her mind.

Humor is a tool that can be used in many ways.
06-02-2013 03:43 PM
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
humor is not overrated but you still have to be a man. cant be a beta and expect to be rolling in pussy even if your funny.

in the game of life there are spectators and players,which are you?
(This post was last modified: 06-02-2013 03:51 PM by GenJx.)
06-02-2013 03:51 PM
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Vakarian Offline
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Post: #8
RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
Humor is a great trait to have. My best openers are witty or off-the-cuff remarks about the environment or something I overheard her say. Sarcasm and Wit are also great ways to deal with shit tests.

The biggest caveat is one I had when starting out learning game. Humor can cause you to overvalue the girl if you make it your goal to make her laugh. You should view humor a tool for getting in her pants, not something to use to entertain her.

And always try to escalate and close because if you are funny but can't close, than you are just an entertainer.
(This post was last modified: 06-02-2013 05:06 PM by Vakarian.)
06-02-2013 04:26 PM
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savvylurker Offline
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Post: #9
RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
Like Mystery said- haha doesn't get you laid, playful helps you get laid. The frame is everything.
06-02-2013 05:05 PM
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Post: #10
RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
Humor helps. Cocky funny is a vibe that American girls just really dig, but gets much less of a positive reaction abroad. Humor's also one of the best ways to deal with a girl trying to push her bad frame onto you.

That said, there is the potential for overgaming with humor. The flawed thinking being, if some is good, a lot must be better, but that's not really the case. There's a time for laughing, but right before getting it in is not that time. And there's no reason to make her laugh 50 times in a row. That's too try hard. Humor shouldn't be your only response either.

Then, there's the type of material you're using. Richard Lewis/Woody Allen complaining about how much life sucks won't go over too well.

I don't think it's overrated, but I think there's a lot of ways to use it incorrectly.
06-02-2013 06:49 PM
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savvylurker Offline
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
Also, going to a good comedy club has been very effective for me as a way to close the girl on date 2 or 3. She gets all the right emotions and because she is following your lead it is all happening within the right frame.
06-02-2013 06:55 PM
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DVY Offline
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
Honestly, I do funny shit because I want to do it. I like cracking jokes. I like being w/my boys and clowning around, or talking shit.

All things being equal, have a few lines that you can deliver on point, deadpan, w/a sharp bite and light humour. This is very attractive to women. Just pepper 1-2 of these in every hour or so, and youll have a great night. You'll know your doing it correctly when her eyes light up like a Christmas tree. Then just go back to normal mode.

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06-02-2013 06:57 PM
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Post: #13
RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
While a good sense of humor can help build attraction, the reverse is also true: when a chick's attracted to you, she'll be more likely to find you funny. We've all been in situations where the girl will laugh at every other throwaway, snide comment just because she's so infatuated.

In particular, when the guy's established a truly dominant frame and the girl has happily accepted a submissive role, she'll bask in his presence to such a degree that she'll break out into laughter at the slightest excuse.
06-02-2013 07:13 PM
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
Great thread brah !

Being able to inject humor in a timely manner without losing frame and becoming an entertainment monkey is something i have been struggling with for quite sometime now.

Like nek mentioned, when i am chilled out and more reserved , in group settings girls might not feel as comfortable around me , but every word i say seems to hold more weight ... in short i get more respect, pure attraction and the mysterious guy thing going on. Moreover, girls actually put in more effort to interact with me. This leads to them being more invested than i am which leads to very easy bangs with minimal effort.

When I;m in a good mood i usually gain upward social momentum and quickly become the life of the party. Just yesterday, i was in that state at a Hotel Birthday party. I was talking to everyone, hopping from group to group making people laugh and feeling good all around.

Ended up talking to this really cool 7.25/10 chick for hours oscillating between serious talk and a cocky funny sexually suggestive humor. I really thought i had her in the bag since she was laughing to the point of tearing up and all the IOI's were there. After the party she even came back to my place to drink but when i tried to kiss her she wouldn't let me.

I tried using the RVF prescribed method of just picking her up taking her to my bed which worked. She took off her top and bra but still wouldn't kiss, bang or let me fingerblast her.

I made the mistake of attacking with even more humor and we ended up talkin, laughing and wrestling (me trying to take off her jeans) in bed for the next 4-5 hours . She eventually left around 11 am today with a " This is the most fun i've had in a while, we should definitely hang out sometime".

I felt like the biggest bitch in the world !

The balance has to be set according to your body and persona i guess.

I think if being funny and hyper is your default state by all means be funny. If you are a naturally introverted guy who has to put effort into extraversion (like me) you might want to tone it down a bit. Skinny and fat guys should definitely use more humor. Jacked guys like me should hold their ground more and be more serious/mysterious.

I believe it is best to err on the side of too much mystery than on the side of too much humor. Less effort and most of all you will not be a time bitch & entertainment monkey which is emasculating as a man. " Having sex on your terms" like Giovonny said and retaining your dignity.
(This post was last modified: 06-02-2013 07:26 PM by LibertarianBootyHumper.)
06-02-2013 07:21 PM
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scorpion Offline
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
Be funny but don't be a clown.

"For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.” - Romans 8:18
06-02-2013 11:28 PM
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soup Offline
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
Humor can be used to display dominance.

Dominant men are attractive.
06-03-2013 11:43 AM
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
Humor connotes wit which connotes intelligence. Broadcasting you're funny = broadcasting you have brains. This is an essential quality to have as a man.

And here is my big thought of the day (shoot me down if I'm wrong):

This is why feminists like Lindy West are clamping down on humor. It's one of the last bastions where men can show off an instinctively male quality, and attract women doing it. Feminists HATE this because females, for the most part, cannot match men wit-to-wit. So they're trying to redefine some kinds of comedy as "hate," knowing once they do that, humor in and of itself will become suspect. And there goes your maleness.

Since they've made being a boy a "diagnosis" in schools and made acting like a man an offense in the workplace, they're now trying to clamp down on men having any personality at all -- hence their hatred for comedy.

The irony is, there is nothing funny about what feminists are doing so it's hard to have humor about it. But we need to ask ourselves why they chose to pick on comedy -- of all things -- and why now.
06-04-2013 04:07 PM
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
Soup has it right. Humor wins when you use it to show dominance. Chicks like dudes who are smarter than them and who can take the piss out of them without being outright insulting. Giving someone just the right amount of shit shows a high degree of social intelligence.

Just like having big muscles alone wont get you laid being funny is a tool that can help if you know how to use it.
06-04-2013 09:20 PM
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
Humor + well dressed + in good shape = good
06-05-2013 06:44 PM
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
Humor should be one tool in your game. There is nothing wrong with using dance game, cooking game, humor game, to game women.

If you have good humor(most people don't), then you should be using it to game women.
06-05-2013 07:41 PM
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
I'm funny as hell but I ain't no joke either.
06-05-2013 08:10 PM
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
(06-02-2013 01:06 PM)nek Wrote:  It's something I've been noticing a lot lately, but it seems to me the witty/funny guys get girls attention, but it's more friendzone like than sexual. As in, they want to hang out with these guys, enjoy their entertainment, but aren't sexually pining for them. When it comes to a raw sexual attraction, being laconic seems to appeal to them more. Even for me I've noticed it. I use to be the more gregarious, funny-guy type. I always had girls and people I was hanging out with, and they'd call to hang out, but sexually it wasn't working out as much as you'd think it should. As I've gotten older I've become more to myself, even in social settings. I don't have as many girls calling to hang out and my weekends aren't booked with events to go to but the female attention I get is more sexual in nature.

For instance, one of the guys I hang out with is really funny and he hangs out with the girls in this group quite often (they have each other's numbers and invite each other out all the time to events and what not), but when this guy tries to escalate with these girls it goes no where (they haven't hooked up with him according to reports, which I believe based on my observations as well). I'm more of a fringe guy in this group and I don't have as much to say as I don't hang out with them as much and come off as more laconic/terse. However, when I do interact with the girls it doesn't have the "friend" tone that I perceive in their interactions with the other guy. So all this is starting to make me think that the humor thing is a bit overrated. Does anyone else notice the same thing?

I think if anything humor is UNDERRATED. Remember that being funny isn't always synonymous with being loud, crazy, or a clown.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WdhFJ5uArUc
(This post was last modified: 06-05-2013 08:52 PM by Stun.)
06-05-2013 08:52 PM
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
It depends on what type of humor you use. If it's PC Seinfeld humor you'll be put in the friendzone. Beta orbiters on girls facebook pages always use safe mild humor.
Anthony Jeselnik humor done just right would put you on another level.
06-06-2013 11:20 AM
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DarkTriad Offline
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
When women say humor is great, you've just got to realize that women don't find funny men funny, they think attractive men are funny.
06-10-2013 12:52 PM
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Parlay44 Offline
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RE: Humor overrated as an attraction trait?
Humor is a way to display your intelligence. Smart guys make smart babies. Some girls are into that especially as they get older and around marriage age. Do you know how many " look how smart my baby is" pics I see on Facebook? It's sickening.

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06-10-2013 02:23 PM
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