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Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
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jlev Offline
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Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
Hello,

I have been a lurker on this forum for a couple of months. Trying to read and understand the game. I am a newbie. Currently in Colombia for a month for work. I have had success beyond my expectations. I have only tried pipelining on colombiacupid. Got 2 single day lays in Barranquilla. I was visiting Cartagena last weekend. And almost got the 3rd. This question is about that girl.

Girl: 26, Paisa, living in Cartagena. Has two kids, I don't care. She is the prettiest girl I have dated. Probably a 8/9+ on the prettiness scale. Green eyes. Great personality. Found her on CC. Talked on whatsapp for a week or two.

Saturday night: When I went to Cartagena for the weekend, met her for dinner. We seemed to like each other. So we decided that we are going out that night. We went back to my hotel, because I needed to change my clothes. I didn't make any moves while we were in my room. Then went out drinking and later to a nightclub. All night, she wouldn't let me kiss saying that she doesn't kiss on the first date. She also would keep a distance while dancing, which is strange for girls in Colombia. Somewhere during the night out, I told her about my travels and pictures on my laptop that I wanted to show her. When we left the club, I told her that let us go back to my hotel because I wanted to show her those pictures. She agreed. She was 3/4 drinks down. Back at the hotel, we made out. There was a lot of resistance, but the clothes were coming off. I had to keep restarting every time she stopped/got alarmed. It got down to her being in her panties & I in my jeans. When I was taking of my jeans, that alarmed her, she wore her clothes and wanted to leave. Which she did, because I could not convince her to stay. I am pretty sure that this was the last resistance. If I could have had another try at it, I would be able to close the deal. Paid her cab money.

Sunday night: We decide to meet again for dinner. I was fully expecting to close the deal this time, based on what happened on Sat night. She shows up with a friend. Dinner. Then drinks at another place. For 3 of us. 100$ total. In the night, she came up with an excuse that she needed to wake up really early the next morning and that she can't come back to my hotel. Which she didn't. We take a cab to my hotel. She and her friend continued in that cab to their home. I pay cab money. She promised that she will come to the hotel next morning for breakfast before I am supposed to leave. I was of course pissed that she didn't come back with me that night.

Monday morning: She comes and doesn't want to do anything other than make out. And she wants me to take her out for breakfast. Which I don't at this point. I was pissed and there wasn't enough time. She tells me that she has only slept with 2 guys all her life and the sex is not going to happen between the two of us. Only kissing. If you can believe that. She said that Saturday night happened only because she was drunk. It usually does not happen.

She later texts me saying she is sorry for refusing the sex. But she is not that type of a girl. Now the question is, is it worth pursing her when I go to Cartagena next? I really want to bang her. But not sure if it is worth the time and money and how long it would take. Expert comments?

Thanks for your help. A detailed trip report to follow at the end of the trip.

JL.
(This post was last modified: 07-23-2014 12:39 PM by jlev.)
07-23-2014 12:29 PM
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Donkey_Riding Offline
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
(07-23-2014 12:29 PM)jlev Wrote:  Sunday night: We decide to meet again for dinner. I was fully expecting to close the deal this time, based on what happened on Sat night. She shows up with a friend. Dinner. Then drinks at another place. For 3 of us. 100$ total.

Dude, you let her bring her friend and paid for her too? That's ridiculous--you should never tolerate that. If she shows up with her friend you should make fun of her and get her friend to leave, or fuck off yourself.

Obviously this chick was just using you to pay her way and has no intention of fucking you. You let her walk all over you and use you as a free meal ticket. She now has zero respect for you. Eject.
(This post was last modified: 07-23-2014 10:52 PM by Donkey_Riding.)
07-23-2014 10:50 PM
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Post: #3
RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
The juice isn't worth the squeeze

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07-23-2014 10:56 PM
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
Oh my god.

Dont you ever fucking do this again in your life. DO NOT WINE AND DINE GIRLS before you fuck them. Jesus if you did it for her then ok I could see why, but for her friend????

Go read Bang and save yourself a lot of trouble and $. Seriously with 100$ you could have gotten some decent hooker. She is giggling with her friend right now how shes gonna milk you for $ and play the innocent girl all the while sucking some random guy's dick.

Take her on a simple and fun date where you spend max a dozen buck or drink. Buying dinner = beta provider game. Shit thats not even game. Kiss her and escalate, if she doesnt return the favor go on another date and do the same thing. If not, next the fucking gold digging bitch and go fuck someone' s else and their mother.

Go hit up some club for the rest of your trip, approach like Rambo and bang for free.

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(This post was last modified: 07-24-2014 05:08 AM by Dalaran1991.)
07-24-2014 05:00 AM
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Post: #5
RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
It doesn't necessarily matter if you don't bang her fast. Some girls just won't put out that quickly and that's ok (in Colombia it's not a death sentence like it would be in USA). However, there is no reason that she can't just enjoy some walks and cheap drinks/coffee with you in the meantime. That's what the real problem is here - you two haven't even had sex and she already feels entitled to bringing friends along to expensive dinners on your bill. Can you imagine what it's gonna be like afterwards (if sex ever happens at all)?

You are being milked and this won't end well. Stop seeing her and regain a sense of self-respect.

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07-24-2014 05:05 AM
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Post: #6
RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
You should give up pursuing her,period.

I doubt there is anything wrong with your game, you probably didn't score because that's really how lots of colombian girls behave. Hot colombian girls don't put out as easy as western chicks. Even though I found it really strange that she took off her jeans and she didn't want to put it out. When a girl takes off her jeans, 10 times out of 10 I am banging it. The next day that she brought her friend, you probably should have walked away from her right then.

When you take out a girl in Colombia, make it as cheap as you can or do it because you are the one who wants to go out, spend and have fun, don't do it because it will help you get laid. Food is usually cheap in Colombia, I don't understand why you spent $100 in one night. But If you did, it's because you can afford it,don't make it a big deal about it. Ignore the guys making fun of you because you did this.. I know guys who spent 2000 dollars wining and dining in one night and sure they are not writing on forums about this.
07-24-2014 05:19 AM
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jlev Offline
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
Thanks everyone for the replies. Really appreciate the insights.

For the record, the expense was 100$ because I am here for just 5 weeks and like trying out different restaurants and bars. Picking the restaurants was my decision and I don't mind picking a tab like that once a week. It would definitely be a different case if I was living here for a longer period of time.

That being said, I understand that a lot of what happened was beta-ish. Well, it is a learning experience. After the initial success here, I was a little carried away and wanted single or second night lays, however they come. I almost closed the deal with this one within 8 hours of meeting her. Just testing the waters and trying to understand the girls here.

Oh, and irrespective of what happened with this one, I dig the chicks here. They are hot and DTF. I might have found paradise. Thanks again.

JL.
07-24-2014 07:37 AM
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ChiTown Offline
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
Colombia is loaded with fine women, as you've said. Keep your head up high, and move on.

As others have already mentioned, never take a girl out to dinner before you close. It's an honest mistake that I think each and every one of us has been guilty. We all are indoctrinated into that mindset throughout our lives via subliminal messages in media and society as a whole. When I first read Roosh, it instantly struck a chord why this sort of behavior is unacceptable. By taking her out for dinner, you are immediately categorizing yourself in her mind as just a normal dude. Being alpha requires you to set yourself apart from the herd that she's used to. In addition to being cliche, dinner leaves you almost zero room to escalate. Between the actual physical barrier created by the table itself and the actual duration of the meal (depending on how many courses you might order), this really cuts you short on moving in.

Have fun down there.
07-24-2014 09:51 AM
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
(07-23-2014 12:29 PM)jlev Wrote:  Hello,

I have been a lurker on this forum for a couple of months. Trying to read and understand the game. I am a newbie. Currently in Colombia for a month for work. I have had success beyond my expectations. I have only tried pipelining on colombiacupid. Got 2 single day lays in Barranquilla. I was visiting Cartagena last weekend. And almost got the 3rd. This question is about that girl.

Girl: 26, Paisa, living in Cartagena. Has two kids, I don't care. She is the prettiest girl I have dated. Probably a 8/9+ on the prettiness scale. Green eyes. Great personality. Found her on CC. Talked on whatsapp for a week or two.

Saturday night: When I went to Cartagena for the weekend, met her for dinner. We seemed to like each other. So we decided that we are going out that night. We went back to my hotel, because I needed to change my clothes. I didn't make any moves while we were in my room. Then went out drinking and later to a nightclub. All night, she wouldn't let me kiss saying that she doesn't kiss on the first date. She also would keep a distance while dancing, which is strange for girls in Colombia. Somewhere during the night out, I told her about my travels and pictures on my laptop that I wanted to show her. When we left the club, I told her that let us go back to my hotel because I wanted to show her those pictures. She agreed. She was 3/4 drinks down. Back at the hotel, we made out. There was a lot of resistance, but the clothes were coming off. I had to keep restarting every time she stopped/got alarmed. It got down to her being in her panties & I in my jeans. When I was taking of my jeans, that alarmed her, she wore her clothes and wanted to leave. Which she did, because I could not convince her to stay. I am pretty sure that this was the last resistance. If I could have had another try at it, I would be able to close the deal. Paid her cab money.

Sunday night: We decide to meet again for dinner. I was fully expecting to close the deal this time, based on what happened on Sat night. She shows up with a friend. Dinner. Then drinks at another place. For 3 of us. 100$ total. In the night, she came up with an excuse that she needed to wake up really early the next morning and that she can't come back to my hotel. Which she didn't. We take a cab to my hotel. She and her friend continued in that cab to their home. I pay cab money. She promised that she will come to the hotel next morning for breakfast before I am supposed to leave. I was of course pissed that she didn't come back with me that night.

Monday morning: She comes and doesn't want to do anything other than make out. And she wants me to take her out for breakfast. Which I don't at this point. I was pissed and there wasn't enough time. She tells me that she has only slept with 2 guys all her life and the sex is not going to happen between the two of us. Only kissing. If you can believe that. She said that Saturday night happened only because she was drunk. It usually does not happen.

She later texts me saying she is sorry for refusing the sex. But she is not that type of a girl. Now the question is, is it worth pursing her when I go to Cartagena next? I really want to bang her. But not sure if it is worth the time and money and how long it would take. Expert comments?

Thanks for your help. A detailed trip report to follow at the end of the trip.

JL.


Bringing friend to dinner=common move among low-class girls in Colombia (lack of class in general, not just socio-economically).

Move on.
07-24-2014 10:02 AM
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jlev Offline
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
Understood. Thanks.
07-24-2014 06:15 PM
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
(07-23-2014 12:29 PM)jlev Wrote:  There was a lot of resistance, but the clothes were coming off. I had to keep restarting every time she stopped/got alarmed. It got down to her being in her panties & I in my jeans. When I was taking of my jeans, that alarmed her, she wore her clothes and wanted to leave.

Did you try going down on her before you took off your jeans?

When you have a girl that's on the fence and giving this kind of resistance and you are able to get her down to her panties, it's a good idea to start going down on her. First with her panties on then slowly part to the side, etc. While you are on your stomach going to town and she is getting all hot and heavy, you slowly start taking your jeans off at the end of the bed. She won't be aware of it because she's off in happy land. When your pants are off and she's sufficiently warmed up you slide on up, kiss her and make your move. She'll be so worked up, it's doubtful she'll stop you, if anything some mild last minute LMR. If she stops you cold, then it's over, you gave it your absolute best shot.
07-24-2014 06:40 PM
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Post: #12
RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
2 kids and not that type of girl?

She used to be, and learned better.

As a girl's value decreases with age, her asking price starts going up.

So, find a girl who is that kind of girl. Go for a young girl without baggage.

Easy

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07-24-2014 07:16 PM
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
(07-24-2014 06:40 PM)Onto Wrote:  Did you try going down on her before you took off your jeans?

When you have a girl that's on the fence and giving this kind of resistance and you are able to get her down to her panties, it's a good idea to start going down on her. First with her panties on then slowly part to the side, etc. While you are on your stomach going to town and she is getting all hot and heavy, you slowly start taking your jeans off at the end of the bed. She won't be aware of it because she's off in happy land. When your pants are off and she's sufficiently warmed up you slide on up, kiss her and make your move. She'll be so worked up, it's doubtful she'll stop you, if anything some mild last minute LMR. If she stops you cold, then it's over, you gave it your absolute best shot.

That was probably the mistake. I was touching her with my fingers and she was providing some resistance for that. Maybe should have just gone down on her, the resistance could have vanished. Already tried this on another one, it works Smile
07-29-2014 04:32 PM
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
'When touching her with your fingers' as you call it, left hand side of her neck, midway through, there's a pressure point, whisk your tongue on it, it'll do the job.

Go for younger girls without kids. She's already played slutty bum bum and trying to play hard to get.

Don't wine and dine her. Though I have to say this is not exactly a bad thing as I've banged after eating but it is for a woman like her (2 kids says it all).

If you're hungry and need to wine and dine. You go and dine and let her watch you, I do it here all the fucking time but then again these girls hardly eat out.

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07-29-2014 04:43 PM
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
(07-29-2014 04:43 PM)bojangles Wrote:  'When touching her with your fingers' as you call it, left hand side of her neck, midway through, there's a pressure point, whisk your tongue on it, it'll do the job.

Hi Bojangles, can you elaborate more on this pressure point? Thanks!
07-29-2014 06:47 PM
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
You can find it on your own neck, poke around haha

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08-01-2014 05:11 PM
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Rubio93 Offline
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
It's at the base of the neck where it meets the shoulder.... works on 90% of women, no idea if it works on most men or not but I don't think any of us care Tongue

Women in Cartagena are known in the rest of Colombia for nasty attitudes. For such a hellishly hot climate, no one knows why they're cold and lame. I've experienced it first hand as have many others. Honestly, almost ANY town in Latin America is better.
08-05-2014 01:53 AM
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jlev Offline
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
Just to close the loop on this one:

After the events described earlier, I decided not to contact her. At that point, she started pursuing me on whatsapp. I was playing uninterested and responding with delays. A couple of days after that, she started asking me to come back to Cartagena and implied that she will sleep with me if I did.

Incidentally, I was already in Cartagena pursuing other women. I decided to give her one night. Told her that I am coming there from Barranquilla especially to meet her, just for the evening. A few hours before we were supposed to meet, she said that she is coming with a friend. I put my foot down and told her in stern words that her friend can't come. She acted annoyed but agreed.

Drinks. Nightclub. Back to hotel to close the deal. She is still pursuing me on whatsapp, but I ain't going back.

JL
(This post was last modified: 08-06-2014 01:03 PM by jlev.)
08-06-2014 01:03 PM
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Post: #19
RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
Wait.. so did you smash or what?


Its kind of hard to tell from your post
08-06-2014 05:01 PM
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jlev Offline
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
(08-06-2014 05:01 PM)AfgScarface Wrote:  Wait.. so did you smash or what?

Not sure what smash means. But I did bang her ("close the deal").
(This post was last modified: 08-06-2014 05:09 PM by jlev.)
08-06-2014 05:08 PM
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
Nice turnaround.
(This post was last modified: 08-06-2014 05:52 PM by BarryInSF.)
08-06-2014 05:51 PM
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
Did the neck work haha?

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08-07-2014 05:53 AM
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
(08-06-2014 01:03 PM)jlev Wrote:  Just to close the loop on this one:

After the events described earlier, I decided not to contact her. At that point, she started pursuing me on whatsapp. I was playing uninterested and responding with delays. A couple of days after that, she started asking me to come back to Cartagena and implied that she will sleep with me if I did.

Incidentally, I was already in Cartagena pursuing other women. I decided to give her one night. Told her that I am coming there from Barranquilla especially to meet her, just for the evening. A few hours before we were supposed to meet, she said that she is coming with a friend. I put my foot down and told her in stern words that her friend can't come. She acted annoyed but agreed.

Drinks. Nightclub. Back to hotel to close the deal. She is still pursuing me on whatsapp, but I ain't going back.

JL

Awesome recovery man.
08-07-2014 01:28 PM
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RE: Colombia,Cartagena: Girl refuses sex. Pursue or not?
Thanks guys.

Bojangles, yes the neck trick works.
08-11-2014 02:40 PM
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