I will try to explain using a quote from Roosh. This is from the following post:
http://www.rooshv.com/men-are-nothing-mo...dern-woman
"One of the questions I used to ask was “Do you need a man?” Out of the dozens of times I asked it, not a single girl answered yes. [...] I started asking a different question to women: “Do you want a man?” I began receiving “I don’t know” answers. [...] Only in a few instances did a woman outright say yes, and these usually happened in Ukraine. It’s no surprise that I eased into mini-relationships with these yes girls without the standard flaking or game-playing you would normally receive from girls who see men as milk instead of water. The girls who said yes weren’t exactly hurting for food or shelter, and they didn’t try to reach into my pockets for resources, but through their attitude and demeanor it was clear that they did want a man in their life who could provide it with a measure of happiness that could not be gained from their environment or government. [...] From a young age, girls are brainwashed to believe that they don’t need men and that the key to their happiness is self-empowerment by sleeping around and becoming a corporate wage slave. [...] This is why even lesser alpha males fail to enter relationships with women beyond a few bangs."
"Do you want a man?" is a good question. I can attest to the fact that the predominant answer to this question in the West is a resounding no. I used to think women were not serious when they said this, and did not understand that this widespread mentality would have real-world implications. It is an example of an R-selected society. We see R/K selection as male strategies, but we rarely see them as female strategies, which are even more important. In this sense, a man looking for love in America may be disillusioned, as will a man looking for casual [free] sex in Belarus. Here are some of the reasons that have been mentioned up for this (remember this applies only to young girls who are under 28-30):
1. There is a cultural shift where men (at least alpha men) stop wanting relationships. Women get pumped and dumped, they get hurt, and protect themselves emotionally by rejecting the idea of love and of a relationship altogether. You hear Russian girls speak of love as if it were the most important thing in the world, an American girl would laugh at you for believing such a thing even exists. Female sexualization is a form of ego-protection. If you realize you cannot secure the commitment of the other sex, you may go "fuck it" and use them all for sex, pumping and dumping your way through hordes of women, perhaps even unknowingly discarding some who would have commited.
2. Women do not take experience well. A breakup from her teen years can destroy her to the point where she renounces the idea of emotional connection altogether. If you mix this with feminist ideology, which encourages women to be free of men and enjoy their sexuality, they degenerate into their purely sexual state, operating pretty much like men.
3. Heavy workload from college or career (often both at once), which serves as another hamsterization not to get into a relationship and enjoy casual sex.
4. Delaying of marriage until age 28-30. A 22 year old girl may meet the perfect man, and yet still not marry because her time, established by society, has yet not come. You'd be suprised how many Western women equate commitment with family and marriage (more so the more Western the culture).
5. Logical reasons: The boyfriend is the public man, the man who is introduced to family, friends... He must meet a certain profile, which is usually the responsible beta profile. There in an incongruence here in that she isn't attracted to this profile, serving as yet another reason not to get into a relationship.
This encompasses the R-selected female MINDSET. A girl with this mindset hasn't necessarily slept with a lot of men, but under the right circumstances she would (lives alone, frequents clubs, access to online dating). These circumstances are being met at higher levels than ever before across many of the blue countries, meaning the percentages of girls who act on their mindset is rising, and is higher the more Western the country. Therefore, there are three types of young girls you will meet from cold approach:
1. Long-term single: She still has sex with men, some of whom want to be her boyfriend, but she doesn't want a boyfriend. In Anglo countries this is probably 50+% of women. The percentage is higher the more Westernized the culture.
2. Girls with boyfriends: If the girl is pressured by her family, and sometimes if she is lonely, she will make the logical decision to get into a relationship with a man who fits the right profile as mentioned above (usually beta, long-term-boyfriends are very rarely alpha males). Since it is a logical decision, almost never an emotional one, there is no attraction, which is why it is usually so easy to get these girls to cheat, barring cultural inhibitions (which are less and less the more Western the culture).
3. Girls looking for a boyfriend whose desired profile you don't fit: These will be the grand minority of girls. As an R-selected player and a foreigner, you will rarely fit the profile. Also, the cold approach itself puts you at a disadvantage here, as usually Western girls will form these relationships through social circle. A player will always do more damage to a girl's reputation, especially if he is foreign and cold-approached, than a beta male who already knows everybody. The cold-approach makes you her indiscretion, she classifies you from the beginning as the lover, the indiscretion, and essentially most girls in these cultures will not frame you as a boyfriend.
For this reason, an R-selected strategy is the only one that works. You cannot frame yourself as the boyfriend unless you meet her through social circle and are extremely lucky. K-selection simply doesn't work, which is why we don't use it. With R-selection you get girls with boyfriends, you get the long-term singles who don't want boyfriends, and you get the girls who are looking but classify you as a lover. If you frame yourself as a boyfriend you lose the girl before even getting the bang.
And yet, the problem with R-selection is that affairs end as fast as they begin. The reason for this is not that you took her to bed fast, or buyer's remorse, it is the mentality of the girl you are dealing with. If the girl doesn't want a boyfriend, she will stay with you (assuming you didn't label anything) as long as her FEELS tell her to. The moment the movie gets a bit bland (and nobody can keep it going forever) she will bail. For this reason Roosh speaks of lesser alphas being unable to secure the commitment of young Western girls. Even in Romania, which I gamed in personally and can attest to, she didn't keep most girls past a few bangs, and lost many after just one. Surely some were his choice, but some were not.
Therefore the only way to get into a relationship with a young Western girl is by either meeting her through her social circle and getting lucky, or making her fall in love with. The second is a feasable strategy, but you must have very tight game (remember you will be dealing with high-count women) and it will happen less that 20-30% of the time. It can be done, but with a ridiculously low ROI. I remember one time, in Poland of all places, a girl told me on the first date she didn't want a relationship (I lost 5 girls until I finally figured out it was an R-selected society, not K as I thought at first). We got into an open relationship, and after about 2 months she fell in love with me and demanded commitment.
With regards to the map, there is of course some guesswork, but from personal experience I can guarantee these places: Poland, Romania, Hungary, Czech Republic, Russia, Ukraine, Brazil, Spain (and by extension Argentina). I assume everyone agrees on Western Europe and the Anglosphere. A good rule of thumb is that the more Westernized the culture (look at how women dress on the streets, what their general beliefs are...), the more R-selected it will be. Needless to say not every country is the same, ASD also plays a role. In Hungary, for example, you will have to overcome resistance to get the bang, but the mindset is in your favour and she has probably had one-night-stands before. In America, an extreme version of R-selection, ASD is minimal and you can often bang with virtually no LMR (though this is often the case in Eastern Europe and South America aswell).
My solution to this is what many men, I believe, have done without realizing. I focus solely on the sexual aspect of relationships with R-selected girls. If I want to feel affection or tenderness in a relationship with a girl, if I am at a point in my life where I want that, I find a way of travelling to the red countries (in my case, Russia) to get it.
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