(10-11-2014 10:25 PM)Alexanderthelarge Wrote: Just to make things clear, I'm talking about this in a daygame context.
Would you elaborate on getting her logistics and details?--Some girls will reply with "I'm going shopping" when I ask what they're up to, and I find it difficult to follow up from there.
I'm still relatively new to this and I'm still trying to figure out how to work around group dynamics.
One of the things I've found most challenging is group sets. I've opened direct on a few group sets and I've been blown out quite often (the friend just dragged the girl away) I've had one group set that not only didnt cockblock me, but actually helped me, a few days ago.
I've tried indirect like an opinion opener but I couldn't transition from there.
Before you go out
- sleeping with a girl is not easy, but it is natural
- for day game, you need a goal - phone #, instadate, 3some - pick something
The approach
- you see her
- walk over
- get her attention - *tap on her shoulder* or "say something"
- OPEN her - maybe the 1st thing you say to her opens her for conversation, but usually the first thing you say to a chick she doesn't hear, and it just alerts her to your presence
- Definition of Open - she's at least participating in the conversation, not 50/50, but nods, smiles, gestures, little helper statements...
- AFTER SHE IS OPEN
a) Coffee shop - "so when's the study group coming?"
b) mall - "who's gonna help you pick out that mini-skirt over there"
Remember, a chick may not clue you in, or give you any help.
So you assume/use a cold read.
OR
You can straight up ask her, where her friends are.
It will feel awkward at first. And your feelings and body language will communicate that to her. Which is why you need to do it a whole lot, so that it becomes normal.
You're becoming a better version of yourself. A more outgoing, assertive, friendly, cool version of yourself. There will be growing pains, and this is one of them.
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As I read what you've written, you sound tentative about this whole process.
Little bit of fear.
Sounds like you're putting your feet into her high heels.
Like you're empathizing.
"I wouldn't want be bothered by some random stranger"
But what is going on in her mind, you'll NEVER KNOW.
She may be overjoyed.
She may be a little bit feisty, maybe frisky.
She may be having a bad day.
She might be a lesbian.
She could just enjoy toying with your affections.
You don't know.
You also don't know if you're field tested opener, that has worked in the past 20 girls will offend her.
At this stage in the game, the "shaking hands" stage, you're not going to have any magic words that make every chick amenable to a discussion.
So you're going to have to kill your ego.
Or become delusionally confident.
You're going to have to lose your empathy, and stop trying to think about what's in her mind.
Most guys want to be super flexible and always have the right thing to say to any girl, in every situation. Not gonna happen Chief.
Sometimes "Hey" is offensive.
You have to push forward in general.
WIA