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Dating in your 20s vs your 30s
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kongzi Offline
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Dating in your 20s vs your 30s
I'm in my 20s, pursuing my Master's degree and hope to work as a statistician/programmer when I graduate. Many alumni from my program got jobs in Wall Street, making very good salaries. I didn't do well with American girls when younger, but got alot more attention from Asian girls during my recent short stay in Asia

I want to move out of the US permanently and build a career abroad, without having to resort to English teaching

I have no desire to start a family, have kids or get married anytime soon.

My main question is how is dating for guys in their 30s who are not interested in getting married? I definitely do have a preference for younger women. If I am well off financially, in shape, and pretty friendly dude, will I do well with women? I worry that the women that do want to date an older guy will only be in it for my money or because they see me as a stable provider/good marriage material.

Are foreign women (from 1st-world countries) more likely to be interested in guys in their 30s than American women? I highly prefer foreign women (especially the ones from the 1st-world Asian countries- Korea, Japan, Taiwan, etc) over American women

Thanks
(This post was last modified: 10-17-2014 12:10 PM by kongzi.)
10-17-2014 12:09 PM
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Phoenix Offline
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Post: #2
RE: Dating in your 20s vs your 30s
As an example, when I browse dating websites in Asian countries, 18 year olds set their 'preferred age' range higher on average than Western women. In Australia POF it was 30 or lower. In Asia dating websites they would often go up to 35. In some extreme cases they set their minimums to 30.
I have been with girls who's ex-boyfriends had been 40s and 50s whilst they were early twenties.

So yeah they are more lenient with age. Probably because they have more traditional standards of male quality. No sensible 20 year old woman wants to be with a 20 year old clueless kid if they have the option of a 30yo winner.

My advice, do not concern yourself any more with 'will this be acceptable, is my masters a good idea, can I get nice girls in my 30s etc'. Concern yourself with learning the language of the country you want to work in. It's hard work. If you have that and do your networking and career research, I think you'll be fine.
10-17-2014 12:28 PM
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kongzi Offline
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RE: Dating in your 20s vs your 30s
Quote:Concern yourself with learning the language of the country you want to work in. It's hard work. If you have that and do your networking and career research, I think you'll be fine

I'd say I'm most interested in Japanese culture and their low levels of feminism, but Singapore/Hong Kong seem like more realistic options since my Chinese level (although nowhere near conversational) is better than my Japanese, as it is currently very limited, and getting to a conversational level would take at least a year of intensive studying.
(This post was last modified: 10-17-2014 12:41 PM by kongzi.)
10-17-2014 12:40 PM
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lycosidae Offline
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RE: Dating in your 20s vs your 30s
A guy who says "I don't do well with American women" that has done less than 1,000 approaches is probably a guy who isn't willing to put in the work to learn game and get better at it. So that's my answer... do the work, take risks, learn the attitude, read Roosh's books... ect. ect.

The right attitude is: I don't give a shit... being 30 is the "prime" of your life and your life experiences will make you a better player... if you start now, of course.

If you don't like America because you don't like America, then leave (or travel like Roosh). If you don't like America because you can't get laid here, that's more your problem. I mean look around at the people who are having sex without regards to their looks, money, age, ect. If you can't get laid here, it's not going to be easier elsewhere...

Asia is not the magical answer for smart guys that lack self-confidence with women.
(This post was last modified: 10-17-2014 01:02 PM by lycosidae.)
10-17-2014 12:54 PM
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Phoenix Offline
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RE: Dating in your 20s vs your 30s
Well the ticket into Japanese employment is the JLPT N1 (and obviously a profession in demand there). It will be well over 1 year intensive studying to clear that if you are just a beginner (maybe a bit easier for you if you know Chinese characters). Yes, the Japanese women are very girly. Frankly though, you'll find pretty much any country in Asia to be a breath of fresh air compared to America. You can always move country later if you want. Note that Taiwan is a Mandarin country, and there are plenty of nice hotties there. I loved Taiwan, it's an awesome place.
10-17-2014 01:02 PM
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Phoenix Offline
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RE: Dating in your 20s vs your 30s
(10-17-2014 12:54 PM)lycosidae Wrote:  If you can't get laid here, it's not going to be easier elsewhere...

Jordan
10-17-2014 01:05 PM
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Neo Offline
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Post: #7
RE: Dating in your 20s vs your 30s
You have nothing to worry about.
(This post was last modified: 02-06-2016 04:51 PM by Neo.)
10-17-2014 09:26 PM
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El Chinito loco Offline
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Post: #8
RE: Dating in your 20s vs your 30s
(10-17-2014 12:09 PM)kongzi Wrote:  I want to move out of the US permanently and build a career abroad, without having to resort to English teaching

I did what you are thinking of doing back in my 20's but with a fairly self sufficient business back in the U.S.

Just have a solid plan with the future in mind and plenty of backup options. I know some guys will disagree but I don't recommend winging it. I see way too many older western guys who end up as total losers in Asia without a pot to piss in and without even the benefit of decent looking girls to show for it.

Quote:My main question is how is dating for guys in their 30s who are not interested in getting married? I definitely do have a preference for younger women. If I am well off financially, in shape, and pretty friendly dude, will I do well with women? I worry that the women that do want to date an older guy will only be in it for my money or because they see me as a stable provider/good marriage material.

Are foreign women (from 1st-world countries) more likely to be interested in guys in their 30s than American women? I highly prefer foreign women (especially the ones from the 1st-world Asian countries- Korea, Japan, Taiwan, etc) over American women

Thanks

I'm in my 30's now and regularly date women who are 10 to 15 years younger. The sweet spot for me is a middle class girl right before her mid 20's. You shouldn't have a problem. If you look fairly young for your age then you can do this for a long time. A lot of women I meet automatically assume i'm just a little older than they are and not a full decade plus. It's not a problem for most and if you're just going for quick bangs it's completely irrelevant. I never do the beta provider or potential marriage angle.
10-17-2014 11:12 PM
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Alexanderthelarge Offline
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Post: #9
RE: Dating in your 20s vs your 30s
Kongzi, are you Chinese by descent ?

I have lived in singapore and hongkong. I am from hongkong originally.
10-17-2014 11:21 PM
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Alexanderthelarge Offline
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Post: #10
RE: Dating in your 20s vs your 30s
FYI if you want to game in hongkong, mandarin will not help you. Although mandarin is beig mandated as a compulsory language in schools, cantonese remains the prevalent language.
10-17-2014 11:23 PM
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kongzi Offline
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RE: Dating in your 20s vs your 30s
No, I am not Chinese by descent. I mentioned Hong Kong and Singapore as the most realistic options not just because they are 1st-world where Mandarin/Cantonese is spoken, but also because it's easier to get by with just English there than in Japan or other Asian countries. Yeah, I know they speak Cantonese in HK, but it's probably easier for me at this point to pick up Cantonese than Japanese. Also, they have the strongest economies in Asia and in particular in finance, where I would like to work in, so it's probably easier for foreigners like me to get a job there. I'm also guessing they have the lowest levels of xenophobia towards Asian-Americans like me
(This post was last modified: 10-18-2014 12:13 AM by kongzi.)
10-18-2014 12:11 AM
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Alexanderthelarge Offline
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RE: Dating in your 20s vs your 30s
What kind of asian are you? Ill do a detailed write up for you when I logon to the computer about the demographics surrounding hongkong and singapore.
10-18-2014 12:22 AM
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kongzi Offline
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RE: Dating in your 20s vs your 30s
What kind of demographics?
(This post was last modified: 10-18-2014 12:56 AM by kongzi.)
10-18-2014 12:29 AM
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poutsara Offline
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RE: Dating in your 20s vs your 30s
(10-17-2014 12:09 PM)kongzi Wrote:  I'm in my 20s...I have no desire to start a family, have kids or get married anytime soon.

My main question is how is dating for guys in their 30s who are not interested in getting married? I definitely do have a preference for younger women. If I am well off financially, in shape, and pretty friendly dude, will I do well with women? I worry that the women that do want to date an older guy will only be in it for my money or because they see me as a stable provider/good marriage material.

If you maintain your health, build your career/business, and keep a strong state of mind you will have no problem in your 30's. In fact, you will have fewer problems than you do now.

Dating gets better with age. Actually, you get better. The girls are the same. The ones in their 30's may see you as provider but the younger ones that you desire may not be thinking that yet.

One thing to consider though, and this has been discussed recently on here, is that your view on life and game may change. A decade will change you. You will still desire younger attractive feminine women, but you may desire something more. What that is, I cannot tell you, but you will find out.
(This post was last modified: 02-13-2016 09:15 PM by poutsara.)
10-18-2014 01:30 AM
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Pinocchio Offline
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RE: Dating in your 20s vs your 30s
your sexual market place value should be increasing as you hit your 30s.
(This post was last modified: 10-18-2014 02:45 PM by Pinocchio.)
10-18-2014 02:44 PM
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Cyclone Offline
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Post: #16
RE: Dating in your 20s vs your 30s
(10-17-2014 12:09 PM)kongzi Wrote:  but got alot more attention from Asian girls during my recent short stay in Asia

Are foreign women (from 1st-world countries) more likely to be interested in guys in their 30s than American women? I highly prefer foreign women (especially the ones from the 1st-world Asian countries- Korea, Japan, Taiwan, etc) over American women

1) Just because you got "more attention" from Asian girls does not mean they're close to fucking you. they are insanely flirty, but if you have no game, your dick ain't gettin wet.

2) has nothing to do with "foreign" or not. It's modern vs. traditional. Generally the more traditional a country is, the more acceptable it is for a 20-year old to be in a relationship with a 30-year old guy. In Singapore which is modern, the girls still want a dude that is around her age as long as he's from a similar background. I wouldn't over-analyze it, just go out there and approach, and stay near a university campus if yr still young Wink
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10-19-2014 02:56 AM
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