Post: #1

Ok it seems all hell has broken loose in Paris.

There was a fucking homicide connected to terrorist activity 50 meters away from my house yesterday.

My buddy at the other part of the city said there was a hostage situation in his neighborhood.

My roommate already left the house to come stay with his girlfriend to make sure she is safe.

We don't know how the situation will develop. Let's just say it gets worse.

Specifics aside, in times of trouble like these, what precaution should I take? In France you are not allowed to have weapons. Barring the doors and don't poke your head out of the house? Stocking up on groceries? Never thought I would be asking this question, but the world has been going crazy the last few months.

I know some of you guys have been in dangerous lands. Any advice on what I should do just in case?

Post: #2

Convert to Islam.

Post: #3

Stock up on essentials:

Water and canned foods.

Weapons, a good solid baseball bat (not sure how hard those would be to find in France) will let you take almost anybody whatever size they are. Axes from a hardware store, sledgehammers, etc....

Batteries

Thick black contractor trash bags, tape them over your windows so light doesn't escape at night. Assuming power goes out and you have batteries for your devices people might notice the lights coming from your place. Have a way to cook without power. A camping stove with plenty of fuel, or a grill and a iron pan will work. Get pleny of charcoal.

But if shit really starts to get bad you have to leave the city. Get into the country in the south or towards the Ardennes.

Post: #4

Hide, fight or run.

Fight would involve joining whatever 'reserves' force your city has.
Hide or run is as per post 3

Post: #5

Post: #6

Find a nice french girl who lives in one of those upper-middle class communities to shack up with for awhile. You're asian so you should be considered a neutral party.

If not then carve your shower curtain rod into a pilum, fashion a cabinet facing into a shield, and prepare for the invading barbarian hordes.

Also, aren't you Vietnamese? Improvise, motherfucker. Paint a derogatory image of mohammad out in the hallway. Wait for them to come and tear it down and shank them in the liver while their back is turned.

Post: #7

Set your hair on fire and run around saying "the sky is falling, the sky is falling!"

Post: #8

(01-09-2015 09:44 AM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  In France you are not allowed to have weapons.

If THEY have weapons, you need to have weapons.

Post: #9

Join together with members of your local high school sports team, raid a convenience store, head to the mountains, and make periodic raids in which you defeat teams of heavily armed Spetznaz commandos with hunting rifles and grenades.

Post: #10

Secret words: Allaho Akbar

Post: #11

If i thought civil unrest was possible, i'd buy a crossbow at least. Plus two weeks of food. The foods more important really. Also you need to consider that your electric, gas and water might be cut off.

Post: #12

If you feel frightened as a guy, think about how much less safe the women feel.

This is the time to capitalize on that.

Over on another thread I was saying that aging Western women feel free to blow men off because they have less use for men -- whether it's for protection or to get married or for support. Well, you can bet that this incident has caused a lot of "liberated" women to rethink their priorities, sort of like Sept. 11 did to New York women.

Be strong and offer them the support they need, and reel in as many as possible while the getting's good. I've read that sex and fear of mortality are related, so I bet there are a lot of women in France now ready to get with the nearest guy possible.

European society might be going to hell, but that doesn't mean you can't have some fun on the ride down. What can we call this, though? "Crisis game?" "Sept. 11 game?" You can't call it "Terrorist game" since that just sounds wrong.

Post: #13

Get a gun

Post: #14

Call up Little Dark.

Post: #15

In France you can buy a kalashnikov for less than €800. If you know the right people. Just saying.

Post: #16

Move somewhere that you are allowed to protect yourself.

Post: #17

(01-09-2015 09:51 AM)Krusyos Wrote:  Convert to Islam.

Didn't they shoot a Muslim police officer? I don't think being Muslim helps.

(01-09-2015 11:03 AM)Ghost Dog Wrote:  Call up Little Dark.

Hopefully, I am not in the minority but little dark jokes still make me laugh.

Post: #18

Pretend you are Arno from Assassins Creed Unity during the French Revolution?



You could even find a sexy redhead named Elise to help your cause!

Post: #19

Post thread about surviving anarchy, got the best laughs in decades. Today's a good day.

Post: #20

(01-09-2015 11:48 AM)samsamsam Wrote:  Hopefully, I am not in the minority but little dark jokes still make me laugh.

Whenever I feel a bit down and the news is full of terrible crazy shit like the stuff going on in France, I think of Little Dark and it cheers me up.

What Would Little Dark Do?

Well, that's obvious, isn't it? He'd kick arse!

Post: #21

Have the terrorists sent to Florida we'll take care of them just fine you French wussies.

Post: #22

One other benefit of this crisis:

When the shit is hitting the fan, the busybody SJW and feminist crowd have no choice but to shut the fuck up. Because when there are bodies lying dead and people worry about their lives, all of a sudden complaints about "manspreading" and "video game sexism" seem really irrelevant.

I don't think it's a coincidence that the SJW/political correctness movement took hold in America in 1990, just around the time the Cold War ended. Before then, people would dismiss these wackos because "we have real problems." But once life got safer, they were able to take their demands mainstream.

Maybe the same thing will happen in reverse with an incident like this. Maybe people will come to realize hate speech laws and all that go with it helped create a climate where this could happen.

So you can think of that and be happy. Might even be a good conversation starter (kidding).

Post: #23

Overall best strategy in a crisis?

Be part of a tight-knit, capable group.

Post: #24

(01-09-2015 10:37 AM)Surreyman Wrote:  If i thought civil unrest was possible, i'd buy a crossbow at least. Plus two weeks of food. The foods more important really. Also you need to consider that your electric, gas and water might be cut off.

A crossbow?

Watch out, we've got a badass over here, hahaha!

Post: #25

Do French people really start boarding up the windows over a couple murders?