Post: #1

Whether it's social circle game, online game, night game or day game, flaking/ghosting is a fundamental part of the game that will always be there.

For example, let's say that I meet a girl from social circle, I have her on FB/snapchat or whatever. I ask them out to hang out, if they give me some lame excuse and they don't suggest another time to meet up, I might ask one more time again, but most likely know it's not going to go anywhere. In my experience, at that time they might not even text me back.

I am seeing some posts where a girl flaked and wasn't really interested in meeting the guy, but then they end up meeting later (maybe a month or 6months laters whatever), and they bang.

How does this happen???
Is it from online, day game or social circle?
So if a girl didn't respond to your text, you just text them some time later? For instance...keep them on snap/insta/fb and then contact them 3months or 6months later? Wouldn't it be the same and attraction has died down a lot?
How do you go about this? You just pretend that you not getting a text or being flaked on doesn't bother you at all and act nonchalant/indifferent? I feel like that's a low-value behavior and the girl will do the same thing again and either ghost/flake thinking that he doesn't care and she will continue to step over the boundaries thinking he has no backbone.

Post: #2

I tend to be needy when I genuine like a girl or she's extremely hot. I read some good post about how to handle flaking on roosh and mixed it with my personal experience on what I need to stay "mentally" healthy in the dating game, not just for me, but also for the girl that wants to date me on the very first text when I ask her. Would be not fair when I go pissed to a date with a nice girl, because some hoe nexted me a week before.
So, I always give her a second chance and if she flakes/ghost on that...bye bye.

Quote:For example, let's say that I meet a girl from social circle, I have her on FB/snapchat or whatever. I ask them out to hang out, if they give me some lame excuse and they don't suggest another time to meet up, I might ask one more time again, but most likely know it's not going to go anywhere. In my experience, at that time they might not even text me back.

I would also do it like you just did. Ask some days later for a second date. If she doesn't reply the second time, forget her. Delete and block her.

Quote:I am seeing some posts where a girl flaked and wasn't really interested in meeting the guy, but then they end up meeting later (maybe a month or 6months laters whatever), and they bang.

In the past when a girl flaked more than once, I saved her number from "Natalie" to "flaky1" and so on. When then a dry spell was coming, I mass texted all the "flaky" numbers and got lucky sometimes but mostly not.

Like I said, now I just block/delete but then you can't text them 6 months later and get lucky cause she's horny or broke up with her ex or whatever.

Quote:You just pretend that you not getting a text or being flaked on doesn't bother you at all and act nonchalant/indifferent? I feel like that's a low-value behavior and the girl will do the same thing again and either ghost/flake thinking that he doesn't care and he will continue to step over the boundaries thinking he has no backbone.

Yeah, that's why I stopped re-engage. I prefer a lower notch count than to run after some hoes.

Post: #3

If you have under 30 notches from pulling girls with your approaching then the only thing you do with a flake is delete her number.

The reasons why she flaked that have to do with your actions WILL NOT get fixed by the same logic that caused them to happen in the first place.

The reason why i say approaching in person is because a vast majority of flaking questions on the forum are from guys that used online game to get numbers and the girl flaked on them. That number is useless. You don't know the state of her energy levels/bordem/horniness when she gave out her number. So there's no guarantee that she feels that way about you.

If this is from social circle game why not try to take her room right from there. Be discreet and make is plausible so she doesn't look like a hoe.


Ultimately all of this theory doesn't matter because the main reason why girls flake is because you are not high enough value for her.
To put this in perspective. If Brad pitt asked these girls out they would show up to the date 15 minutes early, offer to pay for everything without a second thought.

A better set of questions is:
Do you look like you lift?
Do you lift?
Do you dress well?
Do you have your logistics setup right?
Are you known to be a "cool" guy?
In your social circle are you a follow or leader?
What kind of value do you have to offer an attractive woman?

Figure these things out and you wont worry about girls that flake on you.

Post: #4

(09-07-2017 12:54 AM)kinjutsu Wrote:  Ultimately all of this theory doesn't matter because the main reason why girls flake is because you are not high enough value for her.
To put this in perspective. If Brad pitt asked these girls out they would show up to the date 15 minutes early, offer to pay for everything without a second thought.

True, but sometimes girls are just too nervous to come out, she has low n-count or even virgins. You might be too high of a value for her and she might be either intimidated or think that you don't even like her THAT much.

On top of that, I think girls just have either bad memory, bad at keeping up with shit and DO just forget and sabotage themselves from going out with a quality guy. They are just naive/ignorant/oblivious to the truth and just fuck ups.

Post: #5

(09-07-2017 01:35 AM)bgbusiness Wrote:  

(09-07-2017 12:54 AM)kinjutsu Wrote:  Ultimately all of this theory doesn't matter because the main reason why girls flake is because you are not high enough value for her.
To put this in perspective. If Brad pitt asked these girls out they would show up to the date 15 minutes early, offer to pay for everything without a second thought.

True, but sometimes girls are just too nervous to come out, she has low n-count or even virgins. You might be too high of a value for her and she might be either intimidated or think that you don't even like her THAT much.

On top of that, I think girls just have either bad memory, bad at keeping up with shit and DO just forget and sabotage themselves from going out with a quality guy. They are just naive/ignorant/oblivious to the truth and just fuck ups.

My friend, all of what you typed out is rationalization to make yourself feel better.

If you are TOO high value for a girl then go after hotter girls. If you're too awesome for that 6 at Starbucks then go after the 8 at the gym with the painted on yoga pants.

Nope it is you is the whole who is naive/ignorant/oblivious to the truth of the matter...the reason why girls are not fucking you is because you do not provide enough value at your current state. Full Stop.

Different girls value different things and whatever a specific girl values for herself you are lacking in that specific value.

Get Jacked.
Make more money.
Dress better.

Work on these for 6 months and then come back and tell us how many girls still flake on you.

Post: #6

(09-07-2017 03:04 AM)kinjutsu Wrote:  My friend, all of what you typed out is rationalization to make yourself feel better.

Nope. It's the TRUTH, homie.
Girls have told me that they think that they won't be able to see me the day after having sex. Straight up. Come back after you have talked to thousand Asian chicks. Surprisingly, many of them are virgins in late 20s and many of them just don't put up unless you are in a relationship with them.

(09-07-2017 03:04 AM)kinjutsu Wrote:  If you are TOO high value for a girl then go after hotter girls. If you're too awesome for that 6 at Starbucks then go after the 8 at the gym with the painted on yoga pants.

You said this... Then, you also said,

(09-07-2017 03:04 AM)kinjutsu Wrote:  Different girls value different things and whatever a specific girl values for herself you are lacking in that specific value.

You are right. That's the point. I can be 1~5 points higher than the girl in the sexual market, but sometimes it doesn't workout for the stupidiest reason.
That's the harsh truth. Have you seen girls saying that they wouldn't go out with a male model or a male celebrity because of x, y, z? I am sure you would have if you have any success with women and have any female friends. Exactly. I have seen girls complaining that a male model on GQ magazine are ugly because he has too big of an eye, or too small of a nose. Like the stupidest shit ever.

(09-07-2017 03:04 AM)kinjutsu Wrote:  Nope it is you is the whole who is naive/ignorant/oblivious to the truth of the matter...the reason why girls are not fucking you is because you do not provide enough value at your current state. Full Stop.

Sure, maybe. However you have to realize that just because you have a higher value than a girl doesn't mean she will FUCK YOU automatically.
It's not black and white like that. Lol. Maybe she had a bf, gave out her number out, but didn't respond to your text because her bf told her not to respond to guy's texts?

(09-07-2017 03:04 AM)kinjutsu Wrote:  Different girls value different things and whatever a specific girl values for herself you are lacking in that specific value.

No...sometimes you need more comfort with the girl or something else. Maybe they are scared that you just want to fuck them and leave them.
Too much value is also a thing.

(09-07-2017 03:04 AM)kinjutsu Wrote:  Get Jacked.
Make more money.
Dress better.

Work on these for 6 months and then come back and tell us how many girls still flake on you.

Nope.
That's not the point. Flakes will always be there.
Please go out a little bit more and talk to couple hundred more girls who are way below your SMV and then tell us how many flakes you got.
At this point, I am not even sure if you even approach. lol.
Even the very good cold approach PUAs have said that they only fuck 1~5% of their total approaches. That is only handful of girls out of 100 chicks. That means they are still getting flaked left and right. And these guys who are doing it on elite level DO have more than enough value.

Post: #7

Your rationalization hamster is going over board.
Look at all the excuses you just gave me instead of making yourself better, you put all of the blame on girls for your lack of success.

Post: #8

You're deep in your own rationalizations and getting defensive over well known behavioural patterns of women. Ego is the enemy here.

A girl will not "forget" if she's interested in seeing you. Their memories are not any worse on average than men. Better actually most of the time because people often remember facts/things better when associated with an emotional response; and women are inundated with emotion constantly.

Taking it further when people value and look forward to interaction they attend the interaction instead of avoid it.

In summery; you're not that shit. If you were they wouldn't forget, they would show up on time, they wouldn't conveniently excuse themselves. Bradd pitt rule. Control your ego

Post: #9

Game enough girls and yes, flakes will inevitably happen. You just have to have abundance mentality at all times. You can just move on to the next girl and forget the flake or keep the flake on the lowest priority.

Having true Abundance Mentality gives you that 0 fucks attitude. You truly won't care if a chick flakes on you or not. You have so many other whores to contact that you forget about her quickly. Maybe you'll reach out again to her in a week if you think about her? Or maybe she'll reach out to you and crawl back into your frame. Either way it makes no difference to you as you don't fucking care.

(09-07-2017 03:24 AM)bgbusiness Wrote:  No...sometimes you need more comfort with the girl or something else. Maybe they are scared that you just want to fuck them and leave them.
Too much value is also a thing.

This is my problem. I come off a little too aggressive at times and my comfort game is terrible. I just don't have the patience to play the puppy dogs and ice cream bullshit. But you have to.

Post: #10

(09-06-2017 09:01 PM)bgbusiness Wrote:  I am seeing some posts where a girl flaked and wasn't really interested in meeting the guy, but then they end up meeting later (maybe a month or 6months laters whatever), and they bang.

How does this happen???
Is it from online, day game or social circle?
So if a girl didn't respond to your text, you just text them some time later? For instance...keep them on snap/insta/fb and then contact them 3months or 6months later? Wouldn't it be the same and attraction has died down a lot?

I can give you an anecdote about a girl I just hooked up with.

Contacted through Tinder. Chatted the first night and she was responsive and interested.

She flaked twice. Both times said she had no energy after a long week of work or study. From our chats, I see her as an introverted type.

I didn't make a big deal of it. Something like: "cool, if you're not feeling it tonight, let's do it another time".

I wrote her 10 days after the second flake and she didn't respond. First time that had happened. I didn't write further.

**

A week after that, she writes again on a Sunday night. She doesn't apologize for going radio silent, but seems a lot more motivated to meet.

I get her out for drinks and dinner the same night she contacts me. Then we go out mid-week and she comes to my place. Zero LMR.

Total time from Tinder match to +1: about 6 weeks.

**

The times when she flaked, I didn't mind too much. Even though she did it without notice.

I never felt she was canceling on me for a better offer. And I had other things to do, so the free time was welcome.

Post: #11

And you have to remember that men and women speak different languages. When we, as a man, make plans we mean it. Our word actually is bonding us to said future action. It is a logical process: We agreed to something, we intend to follow through with it (in most cases). After all, a man who doesn't follow through on his word isn't really a man. We are taught this at a young age.

Women, on the other hand, don't mean it like we do. Sure, maybe at that exact moment when she agreed to meet she meant it. But the thought is fleeting. Her mind races and concentrates on the next emotional need.

Don't take it personally. Lashing out at a flakey female just makes you look needy and if she wasn't attracted to you before she surely won't be with your neediness.

Understand the type of creatures females are and learn to accept it.

Post: #12

(09-08-2017 10:56 AM)Tigre Wrote:  

(09-06-2017 09:01 PM)bgbusiness Wrote:  I am seeing some posts where a girl flaked and wasn't really interested in meeting the guy, but then they end up meeting later (maybe a month or 6months laters whatever), and they bang.

How does this happen???
Is it from online, day game or social circle?
So if a girl didn't respond to your text, you just text them some time later? For instance...keep them on snap/insta/fb and then contact them 3months or 6months later? Wouldn't it be the same and attraction has died down a lot?

I can give you an anecdote about a girl I just hooked up with.

Contacted through Tinder. Chatted the first night and she was responsive and interested.

She flaked twice. Both times said she had no energy after a long week of work or study. From our chats, I see her as an introverted type.

I didn't make a big deal of it. Something like: "cool, if you're not feeling it tonight, let's do it another time".

I wrote her 10 days after the second flake and she didn't respond. First time that had happened. I didn't write further.

**

A week after that, she writes again on a Sunday night. She doesn't apologize for going radio silent, but seems a lot more motivated to meet.

I get her out for drinks and dinner the same night she contacts me. Then we go out mid-week and she comes to my place. Zero LMR.

Total time from Tinder match to +1: about 6 weeks.

**

The times when she flaked, I didn't mind too much. Even though she did it without notice.

I never felt she was canceling on me for a better offer. And I had other things to do, so the free time was welcome.

This is a perfect of example of a seasoned player dealing with flaking. Non-reactive.
There's no magic words you can text her to change her mind if she's already decided to flake on you.
All of this makes sense to me because i have had similar situations.
I've had girls realized they made a mistake in flaking on me and made plans with me hours later hoping it wasn't too late and if she can have a 2nd chance.
I've also had girls out right disappear without a word for weeks/months and then i run into them randomly on the street or at a club and they are 100% down to leave with me on the spot or make plans for the next day.

Post: #13

(09-08-2017 10:56 AM)Tigre Wrote:  I can give you an anecdote about a girl I just hooked up with.

Contacted through Tinder. Chatted the first night and she was responsive and interested.

She flaked twice. Both times said she had no energy after a long week of work or study. From our chats, I see her as an introverted type.

I didn't make a big deal of it. Something like: "cool, if you're not feeling it tonight, let's do it another time".

I wrote her 10 days after the second flake and she didn't respond. First time that had happened. I didn't write further.

**

A week after that, she writes again on a Sunday night. She doesn't apologize for going radio silent, but seems a lot more motivated to meet.

I get her out for drinks and dinner the same night she contacts me. Then we go out mid-week and she comes to my place. Zero LMR.

Total time from Tinder match to +1: about 6 weeks.

**

The times when she flaked, I didn't mind too much. Even though she did it without notice.

I never felt she was canceling on me for a better offer. And I had other things to do, so the free time was welcome.

Thanks a lot. It really helps what I need to do next time and how this can work. I think I nexted like hundreds girls TOO FAST and should have been more persistent without coming off as a try hard or needy.

You organized this situation very well clearly and in succinct manner.
I really appreciate it. This is what I needed.

Other guys...not sure why they are talking non-sense typical self-development/pick-up bullshit without giving me how it went down. Ex. You need more value, dress well....etc? (Like really bro???? That's circle jerk. Everybody knows this shit, come on man)

Post: #14

(09-07-2017 01:28 PM)kinjutsu Wrote:  Your rationalization hamster is going over board.
Look at all the excuses you just gave me instead of making yourself better, you put all of the blame on girls for your lack of success.

I already do things to improve myself.
I am in top business school right now and study well, workout and game. I am not blaming on girls?

I was looking for outer technique and I got it.
What are you talking about? Rationalization? How? I admitted that I am not perfect in game and I was trying to improve my game because although certain girls know that I am better than them, but they don't give me the time of the day.

How many times have you had time when you know that you have higher status than a chick, but they don't give you the time of the day? For me, numerous occasions. I didn't know how to deal with them, just wanted some ways to deal with them.

Thanks for your feedback though, wish you the best in game.

Post: #15

(09-07-2017 01:35 AM)bgbusiness Wrote:  

(09-07-2017 12:54 AM)kinjutsu Wrote:  Ultimately all of this theory doesn't matter because the main reason why girls flake is because you are not high enough value for her.
To put this in perspective. If Brad pitt asked these girls out they would show up to the date 15 minutes early, offer to pay for everything without a second thought.

True, but sometimes girls are just too nervous to come out, she has low n-count or even virgins. You might be too high of a value for her and she might be either intimidated or think that you don't even like her THAT much.

On top of that, I think girls just have either bad memory, bad at keeping up with shit and DO just forget and sabotage themselves from going out with a quality guy. They are just naive/ignorant/oblivious to the truth and just fuck ups.

This is rationalization.

You asked "How many times have you had time when you know that you have higher status than a chick, but they don't give you the time of the day?"

Cart before the horse.

It doesn't matter if you think you are higher value or have higher status than her in the interaction, if she doesn't think you are higher value than she is.
Please read that again until you understand it.

A great example of this would be those prank videos where the guy asks a random girl for her number and she shuts him down and says she has a boyfriend. Then you see him walk away and get in to a very expensive car and the girl is suddenly interested and sometimes admits she was lying about having a boyfriend.





The girl in the video clearly becomes interested in him once she realizes that he is rich.




I think a lot of guys new to learning about meeting women and trying to get a more fulfilling dating life, get it in their head that "Game" is a catch-all for every single girl they meet.
If you only have a hammer all you will see is nails.

Different types of game are meant for different types of situations and scenarios.
That 8.5/9 cheerleader in your university class probably gets hit on all the time.
You are going to have to break down her bitch shield and resting bitch face. Bust her balls and pass her shit tests with flying colours and you will have her begging for your cock every night.
It's great when it works.

On the other had, the nerdy bookworm 7 that works at the coffee shop near your work. Probably doesn't get hit on a lot, so any male attention will make her nervous/uneasy and she will do everything she can to remove herself from uncomfortable interactions. (including giving out her number just to get you to go away and making up an excuse as to why she can't meet you when you try to make plans)
Using the exact same type of game you used on the cheerleader will back fire. There will be hardly any shit tests to pass, she wont have a resting bitch face/bitch shield either
If you come on too strong you will fail with certain types of girls. If you don't come on strong enough you will fail with certain types of girls.

The skill comes in when you can figure out her personality type before you even approach her. Open with the right type of game and eventually take her to bed and fuck her.

Potentially you have a tough time reading social ques and don't realize you are making her uncomfortable and she's just giving you what you want to end the interaction as soon as possible. It happens a lot more than most guys realize.

I make it a habit not to take any dating advice from women. They are absolutely terrible at it. There are many examples on this forum.
Also i don't don't what my female friend find attractive. I don't care.
I don't ask girls I'm trying to fuck either.
What does do it do for me?
Will it magically make her fall in love with my dick?
Will it make her LMR go away?
It doesn't do any of that. When i'm with a girl the only guy i want her thinking sexual thoughts about is me.


Lastly, the comment you made earlier about PUA's only getting 1-5% success rate is because they spam approach for days on end.
They have very little value because they have to resort to "door to door" sales to get laid.
Also if you're talking to over 1000 Asian girls and not getting the success you want...take your ego out of the equation and go back to the drawing board because something isn't working.

All the advice i have been giving in this thread is to prevent flaking from occurring in the first place where as you want to try to recover with a girl who flaked on you.

I personally would prefer to never have the problem than trying to find a solution.