Post: #1

I read a media story that isn't getting the circulation it deserves, for obvious reasons.

Here are some excerpts from the news story:

A Frenchwoman who kept her boyfriend as a "domestic slave", forcing him to ingest sponges and window cleaner, was Thursday sentenced to three years in prison, half of which was suspended.

Zakia Medkour, 43, was also ordered to pay 200,000 euros ($217,000) in damages to her ex-boyfriend Maxime Gaget, 37, for crimes which the prosecution said went "beyond violence" with a "female torturer and a male victim".

The pair met in 2007 on the Internet and seven months later moved into a Parisian studio where Medkour lived with her two children.

The court heard how Medkour stole Gaget's identity papers and credit cards, forced him to sleep on the floor near the front door and prevented him from accessing the toilet.

For over a year he suffered beatings, insults, she burned him with cigarettes or a white-hot knife, threw salt into his eyes and blocked his contact with the outside world.

This is Mr. Gaget:

   

Medkour told him that if he rebelled, she would accuse him of paedophilia.

"In the beginning there were feelings and then fear and then shame," Gaget told the court.

"It is hard for a man to admit he is being beaten by a woman. I also stayed to protect the children."

Gaget in February published a book about his experiences called "My Girlfriend. My Torturer" which has helped lift the taboo about domestic abuse against men in France.

In the book, Gaget said he wanted to publicise the fact "that such atrocities exist, and are unfortunately not isolated issues."

An estimated 7,000 men file complaints about domestic abuse each year in France, according to the SOS Hommes Battus (Abused Men) association.

Many more are believed to be affected but too ashamed to come forward.

During the trial Medkour tearfully apologised to her former boyfriend, saying she was "not heartless".

Links: http://news.yahoo.com/frenchwoman-jailed...17526.html

In French: http://madame.lefigaro.fr/societe/violen...0415-96000

This story didn't get the proper coverage in the Anglosphere. The French article is very detailed, but I had to pass it through Google translator, because I can't read French.

I hope someone translates his book into English. It's called "My Girlfriend, My Torturer" (Ma Compagne, Mon Borreau)

Interestingly, I couldn't find a single photo of the female abuser in this case, despite scouring the internet.

Also (not so) surprising is the extremely mild sentence:

Her lawyers ascribed her behaviour to her troubled past: her father committed suicide when she was a child, she grew up in children's homes and became an alcoholic.

They also said she suffered from a bi-polar mental disorder.

As part of her sentence Medkour has to undergo psychiatric treatment and rehabilitation for her alcoholism.

Medkour's prison sentence is considered "convertible" under French law, which means she could eventually escape jail time and perform community service, wear an electronic bracelet or be allowed to work part time.

Post: #2

Yo! This woman basically pimp out a grown man with a multitude of sick acts. Took his identity, manhood, and input threats of false immortality to make him submissive and to stay. What's funny is he willingly move in with her and her kids in seven months off the Internet. She won already, but whatever trauma she had in the past made her turn into a succbus. Hope this man reclaim himself back.

Post: #3

What a goddam pussy.

I don't care that she threatened to acuse him of being a nonce 'if he rebelled'. He's a motherfucking pussy for letting her even lay a hand on him once. He made his bed and had to lie in it.

Post: #4

When I first saw this news I thought to myself ''get the fuck out of here'' because I find it extremely difficult to emphasize with a man who is physically overpowered by a woman. Then I started reading the story and it terribly made sense.

Quote:The pair met in 2007 on the Internet and seven months later moved into a Parisian studio where Medkour lived with her two children.

Medkour told him that if he rebelled, she would accuse him of paedophilia.

He wasn't physically trapped. He was blackmailed into staying. Imagine the possibility that he broke loose and escaped. The woman goes to the police and tells them he let this stranger man in and he molested her 2 children. Even if the children don't testify against him, her word will be enough to destroy his life for good. She knows how the system works, he knows how the system unfortunately works, that's why this happened; because of the corrupt system that being a man puts you in a position where you're guilty until proven otherwise. Reverse the genders, a woman goes to the police claiming she's been imprisoned and the man says she abused his 2 children. The difference between the final outcome of these 2 scenarios is what's wrong with the system.

I'm a realist. I understand that men are physically superior and they're more likely to be the criminal in domestic violence and sexualt assault cases than the victim. However, if you're gonna assume this based on men's nature, you must also take women's nature into consideration, that they are impulsive, liar and manipulators who won't hesitate before playing the victim card or falsely accuse a man of rape out of jealousy or bitterness. When you take these 2 factors into consideration (that men are strong and violent and women are bitter and pathological liars), it restores the balance back in he-said-she-said situations. So you have to approach cases without bias against neither party. A man being a victim of rape or domestic violence is as likely as a woman telling the truth and nothing but the truth in a rape or domestic violence case.

If the society had accepted this simple fact, the man could have gone to the police without the fear of being charged with pedophilia and this unfortunate event would have never happened.

Post: #5

Incredibly fucked up story. But it does raise a good point: never live with a woman who has kids from a prior marriage.

When I was doing work with young children (all from single mothers save one case), one of the kids I worked with was a tyrant. He would break laws, run away from home, steal, etc. His mother's boyfriend one day tried to discipline him, and instead the boy called the cops and told them he was being sexually abused by the man. Luckily, the charges were dropped. But after that, the live in boyfriend just said "fuck it" and never spoke to the kid again yet continued to live with the Mom. It was fucked up. I was witness to these things.

Post: #6

(05-31-2015 07:22 AM)Samseau Wrote:  Incredibly fucked up story. But it does raise a good point: never live with a woman who has kids from a prior marriage.

There are no absolutes.

Since my parents' divorce, my dad has been with the same woman for the last 25 years (whom he also eventually married).

When they met, she had 2 young girls.

They've both grown up incredibly well-adjusted and for the better having my dad as their "father".

This is often labelled as a beta pursuit here, but if all parties are better off for the union, it's a moot point.

Post: #7

Yes, we can't just sweep under the rug the stark fact that there were children involved and call him a pussy. If this was a single woman with no kids, I would have fully agreed.

If someone threatened me with that, I'm not sure what I would do. It's easy to scream alpha and red pill but I don't blame the man for wanting to protect the kids. That's real.

Seems like he didn't have much choice; and his interpretation of repercussions to him based on modern law in the situation is pretty reasonable.

The other side of this is something I find even more real and disturbing for him as a man: he appears socially maladjusted. There was some serious shit going on and the man couldn't even "phone a friend." And not one friend or even family member either checked on him or saw an issue when they did. If he was socially stable, at least some of this situation could have been avoided.

So, if there is any advice to give this man for his own future, it would be to join the forum and build his social skills. He read the situation and the world wrong and paid for it. And, he's not the only one..

Post: #8

I also started with the headline and thought "how can she trap him for a year?" and then I thought "oh...thats how, it was like he was dealing with an ex wife in a divorce and was trapped in the same room with her.

She had the pedo blackmail AND she stole his "identity papers and wallet?" so his wallet and passport. So, if the blackmailed him to the police he would have rotted in jail as they tried to ID him as she had his papers.

That sounds like a shitty situation to be in, I would have thought the only way out would have been to murder her and present my case for self-defence if I was caught....because if she had him locked up...its not like anyone knew he was there to begin with.

Post: #9

(05-31-2015 07:43 AM)Windom Earle Wrote:  

(05-31-2015 07:22 AM)Samseau Wrote:  Incredibly fucked up story. But it does raise a good point: never live with a woman who has kids from a prior marriage.

There are no absolutes.

Since my parents' divorce, my dad has been with the same woman for the last 25 years (whom he also eventually married).

When they met, she had 2 young girls.

They've both grown up incredibly well-adjusted and for the better having my dad as their "father".

This is often labelled as a beta pursuit here, but if all parties are better off for the union, it's a moot point.

Not trying to be mean, but trying to set some perspective. That was a different time then, social media wasn't raging and people were built differently. There are quality people who will raise other people's kids and even adopt for their reasons.

But I just think in this day and age it is just different and the risks outweigh much reward. It is so easy to end up spending a little (overnight) or a lot of time in jail/prison as a result of a woman's action and words. For me it is not worth the risk, especially with another male element in the equation, the biological father. In your example, how was the biological father?

Post: #10

Thing is, you're right. There is no absolute and I can always be persuaded to re-think my rules or opinions.


I'm still going to treat it as an absolute rule because the risk is so high that I need to see an overwhelming amount of unambiguous evidence that I'm wrong in order to rethink that rule. The only one I'd easily consider is a widow.

Post: #11

(05-31-2015 07:22 AM)Samseau Wrote:  Incredibly fucked up story. But it does raise a good point: never live with a woman who has kids from a prior marriage.

When I was doing work with young children (all from single mothers save one case), one of the kids I worked with was a tyrant. He would break laws, run away from home, steal, etc. His mother's boyfriend one day tried to discipline him, and instead the boy called the cops and told them he was being sexually abused by the man. Luckily, the charges were dropped. But after that, the live in boyfriend just said "fuck it" and never spoke to the kid again yet continued to live with the Mom. It was fucked up. I was witness to these things.

This is a good point Samulus: The role that straight-up blackmail plays in modern couple staying together. I'm willing to bet that some form of blackmail plays a unwritten role in many couples' lives.

I think what we should take away from this story is:

1. Never move in with a woman who has kids. You are at her mercy. And you are at the kids' mercy. Come to think of it, you're probably also at the mercy of the dog or cat that lives there, too.

2. Don't believe ethnic stereotypes. Fucked-up women can come from "traditional cultures." I'm assuming from this woman's name that she was either Moroccan, Algerian, or Lebanese (Most Arabs in France are one of these). You might think that this sort of behavior is unheard of in a traditional-type of woman. But you would be wrong.

3. There still is a clear disparity in sentencing between men and women for crimes of this sort. If it had been a man imprisoning and torturing a woman for this length of time, he would have gotten 10 years, probably. She gets 1.5 years, and will probably not even do that.

At the same time, I think she definitely took advantage of his "nice guy" Western demeanor. This guy was probably raised to pedestalize women, and probably bought into all the media bullshit.

I wish someone here on the Forum who speaks French (maybe Nightwing or Mikado) would buy this guy's book and do a report for us on it. I would like to hear the details about this guy's ordeal.

Post: #12

I blame this man's emotional weakness, I think it's got nothing to do with kids or no kids, that's for another thread.

He was emotionally weak, so he ended up in this situation. Supposing this blackmail threat was credible and he had no escape, any sensible man would kill her and make it look like a mugging or suicide. She's threatening to ruin your life, so it's a proportional response. He can't because he lacks the inner strength, even if he talks some nonsense about 'morals' as a cover.

I have no sympathy for him or any other beaten men. Weak people get fucked, that's an absolute rule. To oppose that is to oppose nature.

Post: #13

(05-31-2015 07:22 AM)Samseau Wrote:  Incredibly fucked up story. But it does raise a good point: never live with a woman who has kids from a prior marriage.

That's a bit much. I agree for the most part (I don't wanna take care of some other guy's kids unless he died protecting my life or he's related to me), but not every woman is this fucked up. SHe had him as an actual slave and sounds like a straight up sociopath. Most women aren't gonna go that hard, but you never know....

Post: #14

Nobody wakes up one day and decides to start torturing their live-in. Bit by bit, this woman pushed the boundaries and gave him shit tests (which he obviously epically failed) until she knew she could get away with anything.

If this weak Frenchman would have fought back even once it wouldn't have progressed to this point.

Post: #15

(05-31-2015 12:32 PM)Quintus Curtius Wrote:  

(05-31-2015 07:22 AM)Samseau Wrote:  Incredibly fucked up story. But it does raise a good point: never live with a woman who has kids from a prior marriage.

When I was doing work with young children (all from single mothers save one case), one of the kids I worked with was a tyrant. He would break laws, run away from home, steal, etc. His mother's boyfriend one day tried to discipline him, and instead the boy called the cops and told them he was being sexually abused by the man. Luckily, the charges were dropped. But after that, the live in boyfriend just said "fuck it" and never spoke to the kid again yet continued to live with the Mom. It was fucked up. I was witness to these things.

This is a good point Samulus: The role that straight-up blackmail plays in modern couple staying together. I'm willing to bet that some form of blackmail plays a unwritten role in many couples' lives.

I think what we should take away from this story is:

1. Never move in with a woman who has kids. You are at her mercy. And you are at the kids' mercy. Come to think of it, you're probably also at the mercy of the dog or cat that lives there, too.

2. Don't believe ethnic stereotypes. Fucked-up women can come from "traditional cultures." I'm assuming from this woman's name that she was either Moroccan, Algerian, or Lebanese (Most Arabs in France are one of these). You might think that this sort of behavior is unheard of in a traditional-type of woman. But you would be wrong.

3. There still is a clear disparity in sentencing between men and women for crimes of this sort. If it had been a man imprisoning and torturing a woman for this length of time, he would have gotten 10 years, probably. She gets 1.5 years, and will probably not even do that.

At the same time, I think she definitely took advantage of his "nice guy" Western demeanor. This guy was probably raised to pedestalize women, and probably bought into all the media bullshit.

I wish someone here on the Forum who speaks French (maybe Nightwing or Mikado) would buy this guy's book and do a report for us on it. I would like to hear the details about this guy's ordeal.

Quintus Curtius, when I read the article, it spoke to me. I will purchase this book, give a summary of each chapter, and my impressions on what the typical traditional woman is like in the Near East, if there is time. Her name is unfortunately not an indicator of her nationality, but I can say for a fact that, once upon a time, these agglomerations of Arabs to the South of Europe were Phoenician.

And that's good enough for me.

Though there seems to be a big cluster of 'Medkour' in Algeria.

Of course, these traditional women have to be strong in order to hold their traditional values in the face of women who will shame them into not conforming to their femenazi ways. Medkour, took advantage of the poor Frenchman.
The French, many of them are made of nectar at the heart, which is why their country is now crying out in dismay.

Think of this case as a microcosm of what France truly is to its immigrants.
It keeps on giving, regardless of the turnout, regardless of how badly it is abused. Could the media have picked up on this aspect of it as well? Unfortunately, the situation is so out of control that even the Maghreb who do conform to the norms are marginalized, and it could lead to either adopting a subculture of 'racaille', or suicide.

Let us not forget the abuse men have to put up with, whether it be verbal, sexual, or physical on a daily basis, but confuse it with 'enduring'. A woman must respect a man's authority, not demean his presence. If there is no respect, there is no man. This man gave too much, ''he gave his balls'' (COLBERT, 2015) so to speak. If you ever meet a similar woman with problems, sever all ties, do not make her problems your own, it is toxic for your health (as evidenced by the consumption of window cleaner). There are many fish in the sea, don't settle with a piranha.

Hmmm

Post: #16

^^^

Thanks, much Nightwing, for buying that book. Please give us here a summary of each chapter as you go through it. I'm interested in how the social dynamics and mind games went down here.

Q

Post: #17

(05-31-2015 07:43 AM)Windom Earle Wrote:  

(05-31-2015 07:22 AM)Samseau Wrote:  Incredibly fucked up story. But it does raise a good point: never live with a woman who has kids from a prior marriage.

There are no absolutes.

Since my parents' divorce, my dad has been with the same woman for the last 25 years (whom he also eventually married).

When they met, she had 2 young girls.

They've both grown up incredibly well-adjusted and for the better having my dad as their "father".

This is often labelled as a beta pursuit here, but if all parties are better off for the union, it's a moot point.

Whoops, I made a typo. The original sentence should have read:

"Incredibly fucked up story. But it does raise a good point: never live with a woman who has kids from a prior relationship."

The woman I saw had two different kids from two different fathers, and she had never married. One white kid, one black kid. That puts things in perspective!

A married woman does offer different exceptions: she may have had kids from being a widow, or her husband cheated on her. In these cases the woman is not at fault. But if the woman was married but then decided she wasn't HAAAAPY, you'd be a fool to move in.

Post: #18

(05-31-2015 11:49 AM)samsamsam Wrote:  Not trying to be mean, but trying to set some perspective. That was a different time then, social media wasn't raging and people were built differently. There are quality people who will raise other people's kids and even adopt for their reasons.

But I just think in this day and age it is just different and the risks outweigh much reward. It is so easy to end up spending a little (overnight) or a lot of time in jail/prison as a result of a woman's action and words. For me it is not worth the risk, especially with another male element in the equation, the biological father. In your example, how was the biological father?

The biological father is not a dead-beat, and seemed to strike the right amount of balance in their lives, without disrupting what my dad was forging.

In this case, the biological dad cheated on my step-mother with another woman whilst she was in hospital with her second child.

Most people would scoff at this, but the guy is still with the same woman also. Oddly enough (after many years), everything is hunky dory and everyone gets along fine, getting together socially and genuinely enjoying each other's company.

Post: #19

This story was so disturbing when I first read this I didn't know what to say.

However, blackmail or not I think mentally healthy men would take the risk, or go to police first. Also I think he must still be emotionally weak to release a book called my girlfriend, my torturer.

I'll wait for nightwing's book review to see if there's something I'm missing here.

Post: #20

I honestly don't understand the French bashing going on in the comments. I find Americans and Brits as a whole a lot more obnoxious than the French.