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Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
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Post: #1
Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
A little bit about my background: I've never been a confident type alpha male, on the contrary, I've always been needy in relationships and it kinda made me develop a self-defense mechanism and girls end up pushing me away (they start to dislike me even when they tell me they like me a lot). Here's what happens, I read TRP, rooshV and a few other blogs (no PUA bullshit) and I've seen that being unreactive and having a strong frame works best. So I decided to implement this in my game. Whenever someone friends (or chats with) me I always play it cool, when they delay the reply by 1 hour, I do the same, but much longer. I never show any neediness, more than that, I always hint (strategically) that I have other options (I let my social profiles show that too) and this hooks them but not for very long. Basically, this is my game:

- late replies when needed
- super low amount of love/kiss emojis
- punishing them verbally when they say something stupid
- a lot of teasing
- ZERO (and I mean, ZERO) sweet talk
- never make the first move (be it "I like you" or "let's meet up")
- when they shit test me I call them out on their bullshit
- I make it clear I'm interested in sex, only

Therefore, this happens, this scenario plays out pretty well, they're hooked, bomb me with messages, but after a while they start losing interest (even though I keep it exactly the same). The thing is, I never take the initiative, maybe it's because of this. I see guys playing with girls, they say stuff like "who's my favorite girl", "I love u baby" n shit like that. If that's called having game, I got none, seriously. I make myself seem more relaxed, kinda like "whatever happens, happens, IDGAF". What the fuck am I doing wrong?! There was this nice girl recently, but she ghosted me after a week. We've been chatting a lot, sending nudes n casual stuff like that. But then I got busy, didn't pay attention to her, when I did, she was honestly thankful but it all faded away after a while. Am I meeting the shitty kind of girls every time, do I show my neediness somehow (even though I'm very careful and conscious about it) or chicks are just different in my country? I see guys who pretty much play the "I love u baby" game from the get-go and they are getting laid, I'm not that kinda guy, is it so wrong? I think this is my problem : I always see taking the initiative as a weakness maybe I pass the chance when the time comes, I think that I don't have to act up, ever.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not acting desperate, just need to know what the fuck is going on, LOL.
09-21-2018 01:54 PM
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[email protected] Offline
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Post: #2
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
(09-21-2018 01:54 PM)#_# Wrote:  I always see taking the initiative as a weakness maybe I pass the chance when the time comes, I think that I don't have to act up, ever.

You need to perish this thought. Women LOVE a man who takes charge. You have to lead the interaction. They actually think you're weak if you don't.

You need to mix in more 'Beta' with your 'Alpha' (I hate using that dichotomy). And you have to be able to read the situation and adjust your game accordingly.

Noir made an excellent post about this here: /thread-70470.html

"Once you've gotten the lay you have won."- Mufasa

"You Miss 100% of the shots you don't take"- Wayne Gretzky
09-21-2018 02:17 PM
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masta Offline
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Post: #3
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
The one thing I think you may be missing from your game is reward good behavior. It takes a lot for women to game you. Some of the women with the highest interest probably won't game you. So when she does make an effort, you have to reward her for her effort. This is called shaping women. If you don't reward her efforts, you shape her to think that her efforts are fruitless. It's like dog training. You have to say good girl whenever she doesn't something you like. And bad girl whenever she does something you don't like. You have to give women structure. They want to serve you, but just want to know how.

The whole "I love you baby" game is connection game. A woman is more likely to stay around if she feels like she has a connection with you. If it is strictly physical and nothing else, you run the risk of her running into a hotter guy. I usually try to connect with women after awhile. Afterall, why would I want her in my life if there is no connection?

Right now you are practicing passive non-neediness. However, anything passive is generally unattractive to women. All of their fantasies involved them being overtaken and them giving token resistance. Try to practice active non-neediness. For me, active non-neediness is over-escalation. I sexually escalate on women and don't give a damn if they like it or not. They can tell if they don't like it, I will simply replace them.

Active non-neediness is something most guys secretly want to do but are afraid to because of fear of rejection. This fear is actually neediness. So by being passive, you show your neediness anyway! The point of active non-neediness is being unreactive and doing what you enjoy and not giving a damn. The true meaning of being unreactive is taking what you want with no fear of losing her.
09-21-2018 02:57 PM
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blck Offline
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Post: #4
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
Would invite this IDGAF dude to one of your parties ? Never in your life !
You felt for the PUA meme, you won't get bees by spraying vinegar, the first thing is to listen, the second is to tell them what you know they want to hear then you consume...

If you don't understand that you already lost...

Tell them too much, they wouldn't understand; tell them what they know, they would yawn.
They have to move up by responding to challenges, not too easy not too hard, until they paused at what they always think is the end of the road for all time instead of a momentary break in an endless upward spiral
09-21-2018 03:18 PM
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Post: #5
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
@blck

thanks for the awesome contribution, umm, what language was that? lol

@masta

that's what I meant dude, thanks

@[email protected]

that was a nice read
09-21-2018 03:28 PM
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RatInTheWoods Offline
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Post: #6
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
You have learned that aloof game spikes attraction and gets you the girl.

You now have to learn comfort game keeps the woman in a LTR.

Balancing the two is a lifetime's work in study.

Too much bad boy, she will leave, too much comfort and you will end up sexless and orbiting.
09-21-2018 07:13 PM
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Winston Wolfe Offline
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Post: #7
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
(09-21-2018 01:54 PM)#_# Wrote:  or chicks are just different in my country?

Which country is this? Might be relevant to your approach.

Edit: or general region, if you don't want to reveal your exact country.
(This post was last modified: 09-21-2018 10:12 PM by Winston Wolfe.)
09-21-2018 10:12 PM
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Leaf Leap Offline
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Post: #8
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
(09-21-2018 01:54 PM)#_# Wrote:  on the contrary, I've always been needy in relationships

(09-21-2018 01:54 PM)#_# Wrote:  I always play it cool, when they delay the reply by 1 hour, I do the same, but much longer. I never show any neediness

You say you don't display neediness but the mechanical way you're going about it shows you still feel it. Is it possible that after a while they pick up on it?
09-21-2018 10:44 PM
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Post: #9
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
@RatInTheWoods

I don't want a LTR which is serious and love-oriented, if you know what I mean.

@Winston Wolfe

wouldn't matter to state the specifics, I would say one thing though - my country is traditional and religious (but there are sluts here as well)

@Leaf Leap

maybe, I wouldn't say I'm playing it perfect
09-22-2018 05:40 AM
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masta Offline
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Post: #10
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
let me teach you the 5 factors of attraction in order.

1- dominance - you always gotta be alpha
2- sexual tension - always look at her seductively and keep the tension
3 - intrigue - never solve yourself
4- credibility - she believes your status
5- connection - the final frontier that most guys hate

Nothing ESCAPES the attraction hiearchy. I dont care who the hell you are. Believe it or not, some women need connection. The only difference between you and a chump is that a chump makes connection number 1...when it fact it is number 5. She cares more about how socially dominant you are, how much sexual tension you can create, how mysterious you are, and how much status or credibility you got, before she even cares about connecting with you. With the attraction code, you can never lose. My guess is, you are missing number 5. You have everything else but connection with these women.
(This post was last modified: 09-22-2018 07:43 AM by masta.)
09-22-2018 07:42 AM
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RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
@masta

how the hell am I to connect with them?
09-22-2018 11:39 AM
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RatInTheWoods Offline
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Post: #12
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
(09-22-2018 05:40 AM)#_# Wrote:  @RatInTheWoods

I don't want a LTR which is serious and love-oriented, if you know what I mean.

Well mate, thats why you can hook them but not keep them around.

You are saying to me "I don't want to play the comfort game".

All assholf game without some comfort game may get you laid, but only in the short term and with more slutty, damaged girls.
09-22-2018 08:37 PM
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Post: #13
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
Delete
(This post was last modified: 09-23-2018 07:40 AM by ShuaiGe.)
09-23-2018 07:32 AM
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JackinMelbourne Offline
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Post: #14
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
(09-22-2018 05:40 AM)#_# Wrote:  I don't want a LTR which is serious and love-oriented, if you know what I mean.

But women do, not initially but after you've been tested. This is where you will keep loosing them because their goal is commitment, yours is non-commitment.

The fact is, you WANT to keep losing them (if I'm reading you correctly) but you're getting butt-hurt about it...

You can't have it both ways. Even the best of fuck buddies love to be your main fuck buddy Wink (commitment).

So what is it that you want? An LTR or a string of one night or one month bangs?

P.S. Hot posts from Masta!
(This post was last modified: 09-25-2018 12:13 AM by JackinMelbourne.)
09-25-2018 12:11 AM
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Post: #15
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
@ jackinMelbourne
So what is the solution to this ?
Pretending that you want commitment or let them go when they ask for it .
09-25-2018 11:25 AM
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Post: #16
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
I play aloof so the women seem to think I can be there special project to turn into there Idea Mate. I love to have women thinking they have found a gem in the rough and spoiling me because I am not as smart as the fantasy built in there mind. Thats after the honeymoon phase and everything is going great until there friend or friends competitive nature to sway my aloof gullible nature in which makes easy work to nuke communication with the former for the strange new friend. Read the Art of War as well as Roosh for prep for diff scenarios
09-26-2018 12:45 AM
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Post: #17
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
Supreme can you elaborate on this, I'm painfully familiar with the art of war

"Thats after the honeymoon phase and everything is going great until there friend or friends competitive nature to sway my aloof gullible nature in which makes easy work to nuke communication with the former for the strange new friend."
(This post was last modified: 09-26-2018 01:28 AM by torridon747.)
09-26-2018 01:02 AM
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RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
I want to update this thread, I have another question: There's this girl that I haven't seen in person yet, we maintain contact (talk for 10 minutes once in every three days), she's VERY attracted to me and she shows it with her actions (easy sexual escalation, no resistance when I tell her to do something etc.). I'm kinda busy with my job so I'm not initiating contact on a daily basis, neither does she (I don't text her or put her on hold, she hesitates as well, but not being a bitch about it). She said she wanted to fuck me when we first met and I'm going to in a week or so. But, my question is this : she's texting other guys (she told me she was), I can see it too from her posts and their comments, it's nothing serious, the usual "sweet" talk (cute nicknames n shit), I also know she texts them quite a lot and those guys are probably the ones initiating the contact. On the other hand, I did none of that shit, she texted me first, said she'd fuck me and done. But what's the deal with this kinda girls? I tend to think of this situation like I'm the alpha that gets to fuck her and all the other boys are just needy shmucks and she's using them to have a "fun" time texting. I obviously do not care at all, I never said anything about it to her, playing it super cool. One time she mentioned that she got offended when she found out I was fucking other chicks, I was like "take it or leave it bruh" and she had to let it go. I'm not getting crazy or anything (no fucks given), just trying to learn the game and this is my question - what the fuck is she up to?! Big Grin Now, experienced lads, give me your two cents.
09-26-2018 06:02 AM
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JackinMelbourne Offline
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Post: #19
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
(09-25-2018 11:25 AM)Mizo1234 Wrote:  @ jackinMelbourne
So what is the solution to this ?
Pretending that you want commitment or let them go when they ask for it .

Tough answer, how cold is your heart? If you're icy then pretend commitment..

I personally let them go when time is up. If they come back for more good times then that's fine with me but I won't pretend that I want to get married or anything.
09-26-2018 07:27 AM
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Post: #20
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
(09-26-2018 07:27 AM)JackinMelbourne Wrote:  
(09-25-2018 11:25 AM)Mizo1234 Wrote:  @ jackinMelbourne
So what is the solution to this ?
Pretending that you want commitment or let them go when they ask for it .

Tough answer, how cold is your heart? If you're icy then pretend commitment..

I personally let them go when time is up. If they come back for more good times then that's fine with me but I won't pretend that I want to get married or anything.

Based af
09-26-2018 10:02 PM
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masta Offline
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Post: #21
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
(09-22-2018 11:39 AM)#_# Wrote:  @masta

how the hell am I to connect with them?


You just have to show genuine interest. I pulled a woman - in fact an lyft driver a couple weeks back by showing genuine interest. I hate driving when I am out drinking so I had her drive me home and sleep with me.

Basically my "connection" method is finding something cool about her and showing appreciation for it. That way, it looks genuine. If I say "I like you because you are nice" then that would be too generic and cheesy.

What I told her was "I really like your vibe. Not only are you sexy, but you're also very down to earth and chill. I feel that we connect on that level and that's why we ran into each other. Sort of like serendipity."

The more appreciation I showed for her vibe, the more chill she became. It's like shaping women. Or dog training. You tell her aspects of her personality you like, you reward her for it with validation, and she shows you more of that aspect. And eventually she is afraid to lose your validation so she gives you 100% compliance - and that could mean sex.

Remember, don't use my line. Just find something you like about her and reward her for it. If there is nothing that you like about her then you need to raise your standards.
(This post was last modified: 09-27-2018 03:08 AM by masta.)
09-27-2018 03:07 AM
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realologist Offline
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Post: #22
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
The problem is you have "The Dummies Edition to Game" version of game. You feel like you're doing everything right and nothing is a problem.

You have to read the chicks. How they respond. Know when to push. When to pull back. When to tease. When to compliment. It's basic getting anyone to like you that you're just meeting.

And for women a big key in that is spiking her emotions.
09-27-2018 01:23 PM
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Post: #23
RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
@realologist

I never claimed to be an expert in this, currently reading Attract Women Through Honesty By Mark Manson, seems realistic than most books on game.
09-27-2018 02:08 PM
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RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
(09-27-2018 02:08 PM)#_# Wrote:  @realologist

I never claimed to be an expert in this, currently reading Attract Women Through Honesty By Mark Manson, seems realistic than most books on game.

In the title you asked if your game is too tight. The biggest problem you seem to have is reading the girl and taking the lead. Taking the lead and saying you want a relationship first, saying you love her first, etc. are different things.

You need to grab her by the hand a bounce places. Kiss her. Take action and if she follows your lead you know she's down. Keep doing that until you get laid. It'll work. As much as women bash on men, that's who they want to fuck. That's who they want to be in a relationship with. Men. And men lead.
09-27-2018 02:34 PM
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RE: Girls end up hating me - is my game too tight?!
the thing is, whether I like or not I still find myself caring too much about girls, so fuck this, fuck women, until I get myself into an IDGAF mode I'm done being an emotional tampon. I've had it man and no chick is worth carrying emotional baggage. I'm out, temporarily.
09-27-2018 05:44 PM
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