Post: #1

Im in Suriname now, a former Dutch colony where everyone still speaks Dutch. Last night i went on my first of 3 nights out. The girls are stunning here by the way. Suriname has a mixed population of Indians,chinese, indonesian, bush indian, africans and the like. There were quite a few lightskinned hotties around and two girls i consider an 8. They were from javanese (indonesia) decent.

Anyway, unlike in neighbouring country Guyana finding girls was not a problem. It was the Dutch language.
I'm a dutch speaker myself so it would seem i could really express myself. But back in Holland i was a shy guy/beta having LTR's not used to gaming. I improved massively in the last 2.5 years while traveling and learning some game. The last 2.5 years i only spoke english and did all my game learning and picking up/seducing in english.

The last 8 months i have been struggling with the Spanish/portuguese language barrier but now i discovered possibly a new phemonenon.

Reversed Language barrier.

I cant game for shit in Dutch, don't know what to say, i found out what a uncool language Dutch actually is. All the cool icebreakers/funny stuff i used in English doesn't translate to Dutch. It would sound stupid.
I approached one girl in Dutch who showed some interest but i fucked it up. I had instant approach fear and looked like a chump standing around.

I decided to approach girls in English and come up with a bullshit story that i lived in Canada for twelve years and prefer to speak English.
I approached 7 girls with no results because my game was off because of previous instant approach fear. But it sure did feel a lot better.

This will be a problem when i go back to holland in 4 weeks.

Any advice on this ?

Post: #2

When she asks if you speak Dutch, say - Kannit verstat!
::

Post: #3

Maybe try using English back at home? Until you feel comfortable, practice.

Post: #4

Neil, I apologise if this is a silly question but are you of Dutch ancestry? Do your parents speak Dutch?

Post: #5

(11-25-2011 01:29 PM)Moma Wrote:  Neil, I apologise if this is a silly question but are you of Dutch ancestry? Do your parents speak Dutch?

Yep,i'm fully Dutch, an uncle tracked my moms family back to the 1600's. My dad is dutch too. It s not like i cant speak it anymore although sometimes i mix in a english word here and there.

Its that all the gaming i did in the last years was in English. I suddenly don't know what to say in Dutch. It would sound stupid to translate my style directly to Dutch.

Post: #6

Just down some beers and let your tongue roll....I'm sure some chick'll be charmed.
Post some pics of typical chicks there..I love mixes!
You must have mixed feelings coming so close to the end of your marathon trip.

Post: #7

(11-25-2011 07:01 PM)Pilgrim37 Wrote:  Just down some beers and let your tongue roll....I'm sure some chick'll be charmed.
Post some pics of typical chicks there..I love mixes!
You must have mixed feelings coming so close to the end of your marathon trip.

I'll see if i can take some pic tonight.

yep mixed feelings indeed. Im looking forward to going home now. See my friends and family,have a regular life again, go to the gym and buff up, eat good healthy food instead of crappy food, work on some projects.

But i also have to live with my parents for several months( unless i find a girl to crashpad at) i will have almost no money since i will be working on some projects and not having a job, only social benefit money. And i think i will be bored soon and want to return to the travel/bang lifestyle soon.

Other thing is that im getting old, im 35 next month. It will take some time to have new travel money and i cant really get young chicks outside South East Asia. ( although the last girl i fucked was 18 years old)

I dont see myself dancing reggaeton when im 40, although i always look and act younger.

Post: #8

The only solution I can think of is to study what you say in English, and try to break it down and think of something that captures a similar sentiment in Dutch, if not an exact translation. Sometimes when I'm trying to translate something from English to another language, it doesn't always make sense either. People that are trying to learn English often complain about how confusing the language is, because lots of words and phrases in English don't translate to their native language.

Post: #9

Niels, I can see what you mean here, this has happened to me too when switching countries or mingling with an international crowd and suddenly having to adjust communication codes.

I don't know if everybody would agree with me here, but different languages may also entail a different mindset, gestures, cultural bias, style of humor, the bloody way you move may change!

I was surprised that when using Portuguese or Spanish my body language tends to be more expressive when compared to my usage of English or a Germanic language, the bait thrown in the water changes too. This goes pretty instinctively so I wasn't fully aware of this.

It was funny when this girl who saw me switching languages told me "You seem a different guy when you are speaking a Latin language!"

To which I replied: "You see, here you have two guys in one! If you ever fantasized of a threesome this is your chance!"

That's the piece of advice I could perhaps give you here: When surprised by this, which is something that can really happen, try in the first place to control anxiety, that's the main threat at hand here IMO. I was caught off guard by the girl's remark but managed to appeal to her sense of humor, which is what ultimately saved me.

Work on it but don't take youself too seriously, you can adapt (as opposed to translate) your style and language. It can flow quite naturally if you allow yourself enough time and draw your own conclusions throughout this process. I wish I had a magical solution, but these are my 2 cents.

Post: #10

(11-26-2011 06:43 AM)Locksmith Wrote:  Niels, I can see what you mean here, this has happened to me too when switching countries or mingling with an international crowd and suddenly having to adjust communication codes.

I don't know if everybody would agree with me here, but different languages may also entail a different mindset, gestures, cultural bias, style of humor, the bloody way you move may change!

I was surprised that when using Portuguese or Spanish my body language tends to be more expressive when compared to my usage of English or a Germanic language, the bait thrown in the water changes too. This goes pretty instinctively so I wasn't fully aware of this.

It was funny when this girl who saw me switching languages told me "You seem a different guy when you are speaking a Latin language!"

To which I replied: "You see, here you have two guys in one! If you ever fantasized of a threesome this is your chance!"

That's the piece of advice I could perhaps give you here: When surprised by this, which is something that can really happen, try in the first place to control anxiety, that's the main threat at hand here IMO. I was caught off guard by the girl's remark but managed to appeal to her sense of humor, which is what ultimately saved me.

Work on it but don't take youself too seriously, you can adapt (as opposed to translate) your style and language. It can flow quite naturally if you allow yourself enough time and draw your own conclusions throughout this process. I wish I had a magical solution, but these are my 2 cents.

Thanks for the advice ! Ill try again tonight.

Post: #11

Its funny you post this because sometimes I have the exact same problem but I've found a way to get around it.

I speak both English and German, with English being my mother tongue. There are some times when i'll have a long conversation in German over the phone but when it comes back to switching in English I feel like Charlie in Flowers for Algernon (trying to find out where my intelligence has lept off too).

Sometimes here at home when i'm riding the train, or walking through the streets, i'll run into German tourists we'll have a small conversation about random things. I always found that it was usually towards the end of the conversation that I was able to gain a foothold.

So this is what I did.

Whenever I knew that I would have to use German or if I wanted to have a full on conversation, I gave myself a warm up period. In these periods I'd find a place where I could be around the language to hear it, read it, and speak it. Even if it involved asking little questions, etc. The funny thing is that I find thinking in German helps me focus on tasks a hell of a lot better than in English. I also thing a great analogy is a singer/performer, they don't just come out onto the stage (usually) and rock the crowd. They usually have a sound check before hand so that they can get a feel for the venue. I feel the same way with language but ultimately I think its an issue of switching back and forth.

Post: #12

(11-25-2011 07:23 PM)Neil Skywalker Wrote:  yep mixed feelings indeed. Im looking forward to going home now. See my friends and family,have a regular life again, go to the gym and buff up, eat good healthy food instead of crappy food, work on some projects.

But i also have to live with my parents for several months( unless i find a girl to crashpad at) i will have almost no money since i will be working on some projects and not having a job, only social benefit money. And i think i will be bored soon and want to return to the travel/bang lifestyle soon.

Other thing is that im getting old, im 35 next month. It will take some time to have new travel money and i cant really get young chicks outside South East Asia. ( although the last girl i fucked was 18 years old)

I dont see myself dancing reggaeton when im 40, although i always look and act younger.

Trust me it's going to be hard going home. I spend 6 months of the year travelling and it's always really depressing going home hard to imagine what it would be like after 3 years. I get anxious and sad about it all as it feels like the end of the world. In all honestly it's not all that bad, it's good to get some proper rest, see family and friends, eat well if you're not already, lay off the booze and late nights and get some well deserved rest and relaxation. You will get the travel blues, guaranteed, but get some money together and you can be back on the road again soon.

You were brave to sell everything you ever owned and take off around the world solo spending every penny you had. You've been living the life that every man out there wishes and dreams about and fair play to you. Don't listen to anyone who says otherwise, they are jealous.

Post: #13

(11-26-2011 04:22 PM)KingofScotland Wrote:  

(11-25-2011 07:23 PM)Neil Skywalker Wrote:  yep mixed feelings indeed. Im looking forward to going home now. See my friends and family,have a regular life again, go to the gym and buff up, eat good healthy food instead of crappy food, work on some projects.

But i also have to live with my parents for several months( unless i find a girl to crashpad at) i will have almost no money since i will be working on some projects and not having a job, only social benefit money. And i think i will be bored soon and want to return to the travel/bang lifestyle soon.

Other thing is that im getting old, im 35 next month. It will take some time to have new travel money and i cant really get young chicks outside South East Asia. ( although the last girl i fucked was 18 years old)

I dont see myself dancing reggaeton when im 40, although i always look and act younger.

Trust me it's going to be hard going home. I spend 6 months of the year travelling and it's always really depressing going home hard to imagine what it would be like after 3 years. I get anxious and sad about it all as it feels like the end of the world. In all honestly it's not all that bad, it's good to get some proper rest, see family and friends, eat well if you're not already, lay off the booze and late nights and get some well deserved rest and relaxation. You will get the travel blues, guaranteed, but get some money together and you can be back on the road again soon.

You were brave to sell everything you ever owned and take off around the world solo spending every penny you had. You've been living the life that every man out there wishes and dreams about and fair play to you. Don't listen to anyone who says otherwise, they are jealous.

Thanks for the heads up !!

Yes, im sure you're right. All the people i met who are long time travelers hate it back home.
Ps, i didn't sell everything as for most things i would only get little money if i sold it and have to buy it back for full price. Like clothes,some furniture,kitchen stuff and electronics. i had a expensive home cinema room with a 100 inch projector screen full of speakers and amps etc etc. Selling it would not give me a lot of money since the market for second hand electronics is not that good. I still have a lot of things but no money to rent a house and put it in there. I sold all the big stuff like my car, big furniture. I already sold my house a few years before and was siting on that money.

You're right. i have a great lifestyle now but i've been doing it so long that i dont realize it anymore.

Post: #14

I love gaming in Portuguese and Spanish, it makes it 10x more interesting. I suck at Spanish but still love giving it a shot. My Portuguese is at the point where I'm pretty decent at gaming. My Spanish, it's definitely doable. And maybe also it's cause I can't stand American women, when I'm gaming in another language, it means the girl I'm gaming isn't americanized.

Post: #15

(11-26-2011 04:42 PM)Neil Skywalker Wrote:  Thanks for the heads up !!

Yes, im sure you're right. All the people i met who are long time travelers hate it back home.
Ps, i didn't sell everything as for most things i would only get little money if i sold it and have to buy it back for full price. Like clothes,some furniture,kitchen stuff and electronics. i had a expensive home cinema room with a 100 inch projector screen full of speakers and amps etc etc. Selling it would not give me a lot of money since the market for second hand electronics is not that good. I still have a lot of things but no money to rent a house and put it in there. I sold all the big stuff like my car, big furniture. I already sold my house a few years before and was siting on that money.

You're right. i have a great lifestyle now but i've been doing it so long that i dont realize it anymore.

Yeah I'm not a big fan of being back home either. I love my family of course but Scotland doesn't really do it for me and I'm sure I don't want to live here for the rest of my life. Having been travelling has opened my eyes to the big, wide, world and I like it. You've lived the dream for the past 3 years, never forget that. It's an experience that can never be taken away from you and you'll certainly never forget or regret it. I'm sure things will be tough when you get back home, especially as you have to go back to your parents at 35 with no job or cash but you've done something amazing with your life and it's more than most people ever will do.