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Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
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augen sehen Offline
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Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
There's this club in Berlin, called Club Wilde Renate. http://www.facebook.com/pages/Wilde-Rena...2929775052

Now, I went there last time with a girl I hadn't really been thinking of banging, but was building a connection with. I think if we had gone to a slow bar it would've been different. However, at the club I felt like a chump and it showed. She bailed early on and went elsewhere and even after I did find her, she only used me to buy a drink because she was out of cash. I left the club "early" aka 7am and felt defeated. I was like, "Clubs aren't for me, man." She left at 11am apparently.

Now, I'm the first to admit I'm clueless at a club since I never used to go when I was younger. Can someone tell me what the hell I should be doing? I'm going with this girl who's an au pair and some of her au pair friends. We had a good time yesterday at a house party, which is much more my scene. With all the techno/edm music at a club I become kinda numb after a while and just want to sit down. Especially after drinking a bit and smoking some J's.

Your help is mucho appreciated. Idea
(This post was last modified: 03-29-2013 08:18 PM by augen sehen.)
03-29-2013 08:17 PM
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guerrilla Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
Hey same boat as you.

2 things:

1) the only way to get good at clubs is to go, GO, & GO SOME MORE. What makes this learning process hard is you dont always want to go to clubs and oftentimes cant motivate yourself to go even though you know in the back of your head you know that you if you want to win at life you should go, or rather, need to go.

2) normal people go to clubs to relax, unwind, and have fun (which includes dancing, joking around, flirting, etc). if you're "abnormal" (basically introverted, analytical, etc) then when you go a club you start analyzing shit, thinking about how to act, how to approach/be "cool". Basically if you're this type of personality you're going in there with a results-orientation rather than enjoying the moment and enjoying the process.
03-29-2013 09:51 PM
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augen sehen Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
I'm actually not even that worried about approaching since I'll be going with friends and there isn't a big approaching culture here. You're completely right that approaching makes me sweat though.

I guess its part me being worried how I'll be perceived and part that I run out of energy halfway through, which I'm gonna counter tonight with lots of red bull and no smoking. Are there some steps/moves to run on the dance floor, since this is a dance club, no Top 40/hip-hop shit.
(This post was last modified: 03-30-2013 08:28 AM by augen sehen.)
03-30-2013 08:27 AM
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BoiBoi Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
Just go to different venues until you find out what you like. I know the Renate and its a cool club, but if you need a "manual" on what to do there, then maybe it's just not for you.
You don't seem like you are into chemical drugs and in places like the Renate, at least 50% of the people are on Speed, XTC, etc. hence, its easy to feel a little out of place...
Berlin is full of smaller and less drug-fused clubs, check them out. Or go the other route, pop an e, feel the energy and let loose...
(This post was last modified: 03-31-2013 05:39 AM by BoiBoi.)
03-31-2013 05:38 AM
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augen sehen Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
Yeah yesterday I ended up going to a house party and skipped the club. If you say that other clubs are different, maybe I'll find someplace that fits me better. Is Katerholzig also the same story as Renate?
03-31-2013 06:48 AM
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BoiBoi Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
(03-31-2013 06:48 AM)augen sehen Wrote:  Yeah yesterday I ended up going to a house party and skipped the club. If you say that other clubs are different, maybe I'll find someplace that fits me better. Is Katerholzig also the same story as Renate?

Yeah, pretty much, just a little bigger. Also a cool venue, especially in summer. Check out http://www.030berlin.de, a pretty complete list of major every club/ party in the city.
03-31-2013 07:13 AM
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augen sehen Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
Thanks! I'm feeling good today, just got a room that was being vacated on the same day as I needed to move out, and it wasn't advertised anywhere plus its comparatively cheaper than most rooms on wg-gesucht, so now I feel a little more like a ~~true Berliner~~ haha.

BTW that link leads me to EUR 8,99 app on iTunes? https://itunes.apple.com/de/app/lernapp-...1354?mt=8/
03-31-2013 11:00 AM
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reino341 Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
Other way around it seems, http://www.berlin030.de/
03-31-2013 11:32 AM
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lush1 Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
I can reccommend katerholzig especially in the summer, large outdoor bit which makes it good for socialising, also people skinny dipping in the river but when I have been it gets very druggy after about 4am
(This post was last modified: 03-31-2013 04:56 PM by lush1.)
03-31-2013 04:55 PM
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el mechanico Offline
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Post: #10
RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
I thought this thread was about American clubs where things are actually difficult
03-31-2013 07:17 PM
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beaversarefun Offline
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Post: #11
RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
Try going for some very bold approaches, that is lots of touching right away and open with this: Hi, my name is ..., we are going to have a nice chat for a while and then we'll make out like crazy.

I may not work most of the time, but when it actually does, itll give you a legit push of confidence (as in 'I OWN THIS PLACE') and then you can build up on that.

I tried it for the first time when I wanted to get my first 'under 30 sec kiss close' and it worked right away. Stayed with it since then and I do it whenever Im about to venue change, feel bored or sense that Im loosing my vibe.

Note: Alcohol is a big help with this of course, but dont be buying drinks.
04-01-2013 05:37 AM
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XXL Offline
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Post: #12
RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
100% effective if you actually follow it.. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vuzOWmqGevw
04-01-2013 05:45 AM
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BoiBoi Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
(03-31-2013 11:32 AM)reino341 Wrote:  Other way around it seems, http://www.berlin030.de/

Yeah, I mixed that link up...
04-01-2013 05:48 AM
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K-man Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
Why do you go with a girl on a date at a club? That just does not make sense. Do you want to stay up all night, and in the end be too exhausted to bang?
If you got a number, take a girl out for drinks at some relaxed place around 8-9pm and then try to move things to either her place or yours.
Clubs are only good to meet new people.
Damn. Can't believe someone took a date to a club!

P.S. I gotta say German club culture seems weird. You said the girl stayed until 11am?!? You think anyone took her home, or even if he did, did she have any energy left to bang?
Is this only on Saturday night? I can't imagine even on Friday you'd do that after you've been at work all day.
So your best option may just be to not go out on Saturdays but stick to more normal nights of the week.
04-01-2013 07:39 AM
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Branimir Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
(04-01-2013 07:39 AM)K-man Wrote:  P.S. I gotta say German club culture seems weird. You said the girl stayed until 11am?!?

It's Berlin man, the saying that it's the party capital of europe has to have it's roots somewhere.
It can also only work as long as the rest of Germany pays for Berlin, keeping it bareraly alive.
04-01-2013 11:32 AM
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Greek kamaki Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
Drink lots of ice coffee before entering the club till your hands start to tremble. When you enter in full energy you should never let the power of music and movement in the club overwhelm you like it often happens in western European environments you have to feel like you are hovering above the club moving independently from the environment.
(This post was last modified: 04-01-2013 03:11 PM by Greek kamaki.)
04-01-2013 03:06 PM
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augen sehen Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
It wasn't an actual date, it was just a hangout with nothing implied or promised. I do think that a lot of hangouts like this can lead to sex, just not this time, not for me.

German (or at least Berlin) club culture is definitely a head spinner. I can't imagine being able or wanting to do this for long. Plus the drugs help.
04-01-2013 05:40 PM
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Amigoish Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
(03-29-2013 09:51 PM)guerrilla Wrote:  2) normal people go to clubs to relax, unwind, and have fun (which includes dancing, joking around, flirting, etc). if you're "abnormal" (basically introverted, analytical, etc) then when you go a club you start analyzing shit, thinking about how to act, how to approach/be "cool". Basically if you're this type of personality you're going in there with a results-orientation rather than enjoying the moment and enjoying the process.

I am very analytical. It's my job, I am a systems analyst. So I stay in front of a computer 9 hours a day, 5 days a week , analyzing shit. It's hard to shift my mental state into a more relaxed one. I often find my self at the club over-thinking shit instead of just enjoying the place, when I managed to shift my mental state, things go much easier.

I need to implement G Manifesto's-like rituals before going out.
04-12-2013 10:12 AM
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Nascimento Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
Dance floor game:
/thread-5002.html

It is not the only way to succeed at clubs, but it is the most effective I find. Enjoy the process, and the pulls will come.

Basically when it comes down to it, this is the nature of dance floor game, from 6:00 to 9:20:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z92ehuQ92lc

Takes TIME. You are looking at a few months of consistent effort to nail it down. It is extremely rewarding.
04-12-2013 11:56 AM
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Player_1337 Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
(04-12-2013 10:12 AM)beltoforion Wrote:  
(03-29-2013 09:51 PM)guerrilla Wrote:  2) normal people go to clubs to relax, unwind, and have fun (which includes dancing, joking around, flirting, etc). if you're "abnormal" (basically introverted, analytical, etc) then when you go a club you start analyzing shit, thinking about how to act, how to approach/be "cool". Basically if you're this type of personality you're going in there with a results-orientation rather than enjoying the moment and enjoying the process.

I am very analytical. It's my job, I am a systems analyst. So I stay in front of a computer 9 hours a day, 5 days a week , analyzing shit. It's hard to shift my mental state into a more relaxed one. I often find my self at the club over-thinking shit instead of just enjoying the place, when I managed to shift my mental state, things go much easier.

I need to implement G Manifesto's-like rituals before going out.

Computer nerds unite- the tendency to overanalyze is common amongst our kind.
04-12-2013 04:34 PM
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Don Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
Watch some RSD Tyler videos, he talks a lot about getting out of your head, how to get 'in the zone' etc. I also suggest you read this thread here on RVF, it changed my outlook on club game a lot. Gl bro
/thread-22626.html
04-18-2013 05:05 PM
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WestCoast Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
The issue is in your op.

"Clubs aren't for me man"

You have to dig and find why you feel inferior to other people in a club. Look around the dudes are usually broke losers or poorly dressed. Solution dress better and chill out. Repetition is your friend.

What kind of club is it? You may need TOc hange venues, going to a club full of hipsters when you are a water polo guy = not going to work. Just like going to a goth event when you are an athlete is apples and oranges

Did you map out the club? Honestly even when bringing sand to the beach like you did, still be scoping for new targets (yeah d-bag player remark but whatever). When she goes to the bathroom chat up another 7+ she catches you flirting with another 7+ = jealousy hits and you win. Be sure to stand in the "vortex" spot. Send me a floor plan I can tell you where to stand.

Change your body language. I have helped many guys with this, when you get shut down do you get "uncomfortable" that's a bad sign. When you get shut down you should laugh it off and truly not care. Getting shit down Ina. Club is a highlight because there are 100 more girls to approach. This is how club game works. Higher bitchiness just means more work. Oh well. Is what it is.

Hope that all helps.
04-18-2013 05:51 PM
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Nudge Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
Your problem is drinking and smoking Js while going to an EDM or techno club. Unless you are REALLY into the music (which I take it your not) this just isnt going to work. You need to be full of energy at these places and ready to dance all night so I suggest taking some molly, Es, speed or whatever or if thats not your thing find more mellow clubs. Something like reggae, live music, funky/soul/disco etc. I remember going to this great club by the river in Berlin which had a huge outdoor area and inside some live funk and latin bands were playing. Full of chicks too, cant remember the name though.
04-18-2013 06:17 PM
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Cyclone Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
This topic is so badly in need of this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=pla...d3Rs9FxguA

Especially for #2 posted by guerilla. This video floored me on how out-of-tune I am with the rest of a crowd at a club, I'm always looking for the next interaction instead of the DJ being the focus of my attention. However, its tough transitioning from dancing on your own to dancing w/ the girl... (for me)

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04-19-2013 10:10 PM
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ChocolateCockOfZeus Offline
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RE: Last time at the club was a disaster. I'm going again tomorrow. Help?
Oh Tyler...

"What's the difference between us.
We can start at the penis.
Or scream I just don't give a fuck and see who really means it."
- Marshall Bruce Mathers III
04-19-2013 11:22 PM
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